DO NOT.COM..... - Page 3

DELTABRAT · #31 01-08-2001, 05:03 PM

DO NOT...

Ask me if I have a boyfriend and when I say yes, say "That's cool, we can just be friends then."

Wear a 3 carat diamond in your nose (Da Brat style).

Wear the HUGE cubic zirconia earrings and try to act as if no one can tell they are not diamonds.

Have a perm and be a male and NOT be a musician (Andre in OUTKAST can do this, YOU CAN'T).

Ask me about anything having to do with being Black at work because I am the only Black person as if I am the honorary informant on Black issues.

Ask me to type a paper and when I ask what length it should be say "You decide."

Put water and grease in your little girl's hair and slick it up ina ponytail and then wonder whe her edges are falling out.

As seen in the DST forum, name your children afer shoes, alcoholic beverages, etc.

Wear colored contacts if you are really dark-skinned.

Have clear braces and fail to brush.

OOHLALA · #32 01-08-2001, 05:14 PM

DELTABRAT, I FEEL YOU! ON THE TYPING THE PAPER WITHOUT DIRECTION....
BUT THE KICKER IS (THIS JUST HAPPENED, SO I AM STILL PISSED!) THEY KNOW WHAT THEY WANT TO SAY BUT WHEN YOU ASK, THEY CAN NOT TELL YOU. THEN WHEN YOU GET INSIDE OF THER PEA-SIZED BRAIN, THEY MAKE ALL THE CORRECTIONS, THAT THEY SHOULD OF JUST WROTE OUT IN THE FIRST PLACE. HMMMMM, DO I LOOK LIKE A SECRETARY?

ManndingoNUPE · #33 01-08-2001, 05:21 PM

For my gym heads,

Do Not - fellas sit on the machine or weights talking to a woman for an hour, when I am trying to use them. I will embarrass you in front of her.

Do Not - Ladies, don't get mad at me for staring when you wear tights, and the liatard that has the string that goes in the crack of your behind. I am going to look. Deal with it.

Do Not - stay on the cardio machines for hours when I am waiting for them. I will hurt you.

Do Not - Fellas make all kinds of noises when you are lifting. You just sound stupid. You can lift without yelling so that everyone in the gym looks your way.

DO NOT - DO NOT - DO NOT - DO NOT, Do I have to say it again. Don't walk around the mens' looker room butt naked without a towel for like 1 hour. Cover yourself please. No one wants to see what you have, and if they do, you two can handle that when you leave the gym. Especially if you are a wrinkled older White man, my God have they no shame?

MN

Bobby Earl · #34 01-08-2001, 05:56 PM

MN,
You are crazy. I am laughing so hard that I can barely breathe. You need help...

[This message has been edited by Bobby Earl (edited January 08, 2001).]

kitten03 · #35 01-08-2001, 06:22 PM

DO NOT - DO NOT - DO NOT - DO NOT, Do I have to say it again. Don't walk around the mens' looker room butt naked without a towel for like 1 hour. Cover yourself please. No one wants to see what you have, and if they do, you two can handle that when you leave the gym. Especially if you are a wrinkled older White man, my God have they no shame?

MN [/B][/QUOTE]

The same Do Not applies to women...including but not limited to fat, old, wrinkly, saggy etc

Wait there's more..

DO Not steal lawn furniture.

DO NOT have the most expensive shoes on, a beeper, a cell phone and teeth that are busted. Put your money where your mouth is

DO NOT, when asked why you don't have a job, blame it on immigrants. Do you really want the jobs they have?

DO Not worry about my man

DO NOT ask me what happened in class...I was there. Why weren't you

DO NOT run out and buy the cute outfit your friend had on. it's not cute on everyone.

DO NOT have a barbecue and expect the guests to bring the food

[This message has been edited by kitten03 (edited January 08, 2001).]

DELTABRAT · #36 01-08-2001, 06:23 PM

DO NOT...

Drive a bus and/or 18-wheeler like it is a Porsche. Just making turns and changing lanes like the length of your "vehicle" is not like the length of 5 or 6 cars. Geesh!

Drive with your blinkers on for hours.

Try and drive when it is raining in Los Angeles (like now)

prettypoodle6 · #37 01-08-2001, 09:19 PM

see, someone just did this to me at work and needs to be on the list:

do not ask ME to check inventory levels in the warehouse when YOU have the same #%$! program on your OWN computer!

Do it YOURSELF - YOU WANT TO KNOW, NOT ME!!! Sheesh, I got my own job to do..

exquizit · #38 01-09-2001, 12:21 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by MaMaBuddha:

DO NOT: come up with some crazy behind ghetto name for your newborn.

You mean like um.......Bonequishia? Or Sheiniquah? LMAO!!!

Bobby Earl · #39 01-09-2001, 01:21 AM

This is some very funny stuff.

Here are two more:

Fellas, DO NOT tell a lady that you are also looking for a relationship, soulmate and something permanent in life when you know you just wanna hit. (You will end up like MARTIN on "Thin line between Love and Hate")

Ladies, DO NOT believe a guy when he tells you that he loves and cares some much for you after he just BEAT YOUR A$$.

mccoyred · #40 01-09-2001, 10:36 AM

Heres more!

DO NOT...

...ask me to do YOUR job (don't you get a paycheck too?)

...keep calling but don't leave a message (I have caller ID)

...wear lipliner (esp. if it is darker than your lips AND your face)

...be decked out in the latest designer gear and have your children looking homeless

...wear an outfit that costs more than your entire Welfare check

...be LOUD AND WRONG

Y'all have me crackin' up in hea'!

------------------
MCCOYRED

Dynamic
Salient
Temperate

Mu Psi '86
BaltCo Alumnae

LadyAKA · #41 01-09-2001, 10:46 AM

DO NOT slurp your drinks - when they are done, they are DONE!

DO NOT come to a step show with (and I know we don't own colors) but DO NOT come to a step show with the colors of any Sorority or Fraternity and you know you are not close to being a member, even if you are close - Don't do it! This chick and her girls were all up in Pink and Green at the last step show and were not Sorors and they had the nerve to want to stand next to me...you know the association thing ...that pissed me the hell off ...

You guys covered most all of them, but I will say that Tattoo is spelled with 2 T's and I have a tattoo, don't worry it is not on the neck!!

DELTABRAT · #42 01-09-2001, 02:33 PM

Do NOT...

...Amost kill me and my family because you are dialing a telephone number on your celly while driving and therefore, are not concentrating on what you SHOULD be concentrating on!

...Hold a conversation with me in the stram room at the day spa/gym while being butt naked...I'm cool on that!

This could go on foreva! Everyday something happens to all of us and we add it to the DO NOT.com list.

toocute · #43 01-09-2001, 03:06 PM

DO NOT take your children to R rated and NC-17 rated movies. They don't belong there.

If you do take them to the movies DO NOT let them kick my seat and chatter during the flick.

DO NOT get mad when I turn around and tell your bad azz kids to STOP kicking my seat and acting up. If you don't do it...I will.

DO NOT allow your children to pronouce desks like "desses" asks like "asses" and the letter R like "are-rah" You would think I was a teacher the way that bothers the pooh out me!

You guys have covered everything else. This thread made me LOL for real!

AKA2D '91 · #44 01-09-2001, 05:43 PM

DO NOT drive a LEXUS, CADILLAC (ESCALADE), SUBRUBAN, or other luxury vehicle with a "flag" on the back which indicates you have NO INSURANCE!

DO NOT laugh in my face while stabbing me in the back!

DO NOT use EYEliner as LIPliner!

DO NOT dress from head to toe, then tell me you don't have enough $$$ for books!

DO NOT come to a soup kitchen looking for a meal, dressed from head to toe, jewelry, etc. (You always see this on the news during the holidays!)

DO NOT send your child to school claiming you don't have money for his or her uniform, school supplies while you are dressed from head to toe!

MaMaBuddha · #45 01-09-2001, 06:04 PM

this by far is the best thread beside ghetto wedding stories....

eclipse...i'm from down south where they refurbish weaves. an old roommate of mine was so cheap on buying weave she use to get my neighbors old weave and hook it up. i mean, as college students we are poor but that is ridiculous.

on to the don nots:

DO NOT ask me if live an alternative lifestyle.

DO NOT ask me if i am an AEO girl (pretty poodle, i feel ya, mah)

DO NOT ask me if i am rastafarian because i have locs

DO NOT do not ask me if i wash my hair because i have locs (this chic had the nerve to tell me that bob marley had 26 different species of insect in his hair because he had dred locs after he died)

DO NOT get a tattoo of a panther on any part of your body.

hey, can we get some sympathy with tattoos on the neck...i have one from the back of neck going down my back.

DO NOT bring you infants to the movies.

DO NOT ask me what set i am from because i am sporting a red shirt with my sorority letters on them...dang gangs!

DO NOT think you are better then me.

DO NOT get gold fronts or teeth.

DO NOT wear leather shorts in the summer time.

i got an million of them.

MaMaBuddha
______________

imagine a subway filled with fallen angelz...