Deb Ball dress question

[Txsurfinwaves]

I would have to say, a floor length gown is a must. I went to a friends cotillion ball here in Texas ( I actually went to about 10 )...and they would check at the door and I know one of my friends wasnt let in with her knee length dress, and she looked VERY classy. Just think of Gone with the Wind..haha. The South is STILL stuck in the 1940's when it comes to debs.

[dekeguy]

Some comments from a guy on the subject:
Black tie for us can be paired with a ladies cocktail dress, but if the invitation says "Ball" then this is an evening formal. It does require long dress for you all and really should require White Tie for us. According to the temple dragons, er, senior ladies in my family, tea length is for an afternoon "the' dansant" but cannot be Black tie as it is too early in the afternoon. When my sister did her season in New Orleans she was presented by Le Debut des Jeunnes Filles de la Nouvelle Orleans, The Debutante Club, Bachellors Club, and Mid-Winter Cotillion. All required full evening dress long for the ladies and white tie and tails for us, with the exception of Le Debut which required White Linnen Suits for the men (August in New Orleans is HOT). She was presented as a Court Maid at four Carnival Balls and was Queen of the one of which our mother and our grandmother were Queen as well. All of this called for long evening dress for the ladies and white tie for us. Black tie was less used and generally to receptions given at the Country Club or the Orleans Club, and sometimes the Yacht Club or the Lawn Tennis Club where the family presents the daughter being introduced as an individual honoree. Growing up in St Louis, where Sis also did her season, allbeit a rather less elaborate and structured season, the rules were just about the same but Black tie was more used and you could get away with renting White tie a couple of times a year. In New Orleans my cousins told me it was standard for a guy to get a full tail coat rig as one of his high school graduation presents (if he didn't already own one) because he would have plenty of opportunities to use it throughout college and thereafter. They still have Tea Dances during the season, but for us its going to be white linnen suit, seersucker or cord suit, or blazer and white trousers. Black tie can't be worn before six PM and usually later. White tie should not be worn until after 8 PM.
Any ladies from New Orleans please join in and make sure I have this right but I believe the traditional formula for a 'successful' debut is presentation by at least one but preferably two or more of the major cotillions, a Tea for ladies at the Orleans Club, a family presentation as described above, as many luncheons, cocktail parties, and theme parties honoring the debutante as friends will throw for her, and preferably at least three Carnival honors (Queen or Maid at a Carnival Ball held from Twelvth Night to Mardi Gras) but usually not more than five honors. This limit is occasionally broken but seems a bit over the top.
My sister loved every minute of it, my brother and I had a great time, and the guys at Tulane, Loyola, and LSU turn out in droves. By the way, one thing the guys check out on each other is whether you have a pre-tied bow tie or whether you tie it yourself. Pre tied is gross and begs for a put down.
OK, enough from the guy's perspective.

[Cardinal026]

*BUMP*

My boyfriend and I will be attending a Debutante Ball the day after Thanksgiving - his best friend's new girl is a post-Deb, and invited us. I've tried e-mailing her with questions, and haven't heard back yet, so thought I'd try GC!

My boyfriend said its White Tie. Google searches tells me to wear a floor length gown and gloves. Should the gloves be to the elbow? Above? I'm assuming that since I'm not a deb, wearing white is out of the question. What about other colors? If I were to wear a black gown, could I wear black gloves? Or should they be white?

Also, do you suppose most women will have their hair done, elegant jewelry, etc? I want to fit in, and I definitely don't want to overdo it/spend more money than I need to, but for some reason I keep envisioning a high school prom!

Oh, and its in DC if that helps.

Thanks in advance!!!

[OhSoVeryLadylike]

^^^
Long gloves, up-do, elegant but understated jewelry, NO WHITE...black is appropriate.

Have a ball

[Benzgirl]

jeeeeeeeeez. All this formal talk and I want to crawl into my jeans.

All of my cousins and I were asked to be debs and we all declined. It just lost popularity by the time we came of age. There still are two of them held in my city, but very few girls come out any more.

[sageofages]

Originally Posted by Benzgirl

All of my cousins and I were asked to be debs and we all declined. It just lost popularity by the time we came of age. There still are two of them held in my city, but very few girls come out any more.

In light of the recently passed "National Coming Out Day"....the phrase "come out" just brought different images in my mind...

[SydneyK]

Originally Posted by Cardinal026

My boyfriend said its White Tie. Google searches tells me to wear a floor length gown and gloves. Should the gloves be to the elbow? Above? I'm assuming that since I'm not a deb, wearing white is out of the question. What about other colors? If I were to wear a black gown, could I wear black gloves? Or should they be white?

Since some of these questions weren't answered, I thought I'd offer my opinion. (I was unfortunately a deb. Pretty irritating experience through and through, but when your mom insists, sometimes it's just easier to go along with the charade than put up a fight.)

Yes, the gloves should be to the elbow. If you're wearing black, your gloves can (and some would argue that they should) be black. Definitely don't wear a white dress; I'd go so far as to recommend not wearing a pastel or light-colored dress. If your dress is any color other than black, white gloves are appropriate.

[Cardinal026]

Thanks SydneyK! You were a huge help

[SydneyK]

Originally Posted by Cardinal026

Thanks SydneyK! You were a huge help

You're welcome.

I feel the need to add this disclaimer. All deb circles follow similar guidelines. However, there are often small differences between what one circle finds acceptable and what another doesn't. You should probably ask your friend (the post-deb who invited you) whether these suggestions fit within that particular group's guidelines. What might seem like a small difference could be more important than it should be (like, this group might think everyone's gloves should be above the elbow; in my deb circle, only the debs coming out wore gloves above the elbow). Of course, it will ultimately matter only if you plan to continue to socialize with this group. If you won't see any of them again, who cares if Betsy Sue thinks your gloves were, gasp , two inches too short?

Have fun! Be sure to tell us about it!