married but leaves ring at home - Page 3

CutiePie2000 · #31 07-21-2003, 12:25 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by James

Correct me if I am wrong . . . But:
People generally like to flirt and receive attention from members of the opposite sex even if they aren't going to know them in a biblical sense.

I have had seriously flirting conversations with girls at bars or parties where the girl is extremely flirtatious and somehow manages to avoid mentioning she has a BF/Husband all night long.
As have I with men who hid their married status, and I find it annoying and rude, because when I find out later, I know that I have wasted my time. To me, that's inconsiderate and rude.

In fact even her friends usually won't say anything unless they are jealous that she is geting attention and they are not.
Men will be tight lipped as well.

When asked about it later, I have been told that girls will hide their taken-status because they think boys won't talk to them if they are taken which means they won't have as much fun.

You're damn right. Married men and women BOTH do this. If I see a ring, as a single person, I am not going to waste my time. So I don't like it when someone hides their lack of availability. It's tantamount to lying and I will have wasted my time taking to someone that's not available, when I could have talked to someone what WAS. Both sexes are guilty of this. But that doesn't mean that it's not ANNOYING.

They deserve the smiley where you get smacked on the head with the fish.

Jill1228 · #32 07-21-2003, 12:28 PM

Ya know the funny thing? Men who are wearing their wedding ring are MORE likely to get hit on!

What up wit dat?

snuggles12 · #33 07-21-2003, 12:29 PM

Since you don't really know this guy who wasn't wearing a ring, he may not wear a ring on a regular basis. My hubby never wears his ring because he is not into jewlery. I don't wear my ring in certain situations (i.e., at the gym). I think his actions are more important than him wearing a ring or not.

Also wearing a ring proves nothing. A married person can cheat with the ring on or off.

Quote:

Originally posted by alphachiohmy
So, I meet my friends up out last night. And one of the guys who is a friend of my friend is out with. I didn't talk with him long, and don't know him. But I guess he left his wedding ring at a friends, and his pregnant wife at home. Question is, do you think it is OK for married people to go out without wearing rings. My friend has said that he acts single when out with the guys. Just thought it was odd and wanted to see if this happens all the time... Any thoughts?

sigmagrrl · #34 07-21-2003, 12:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jill1228
Ya know the funny thing? Men who are wearing their wedding ring are MORE likely to get hit on!

What up wit dat?

This is when I get very upset with my gender!!

I don't hit on men with girlfriends! Why would I hit on men who are clearly married!?!?!?

No wonder there are women with trust issues! They're shady characters themselves!!

Once I find out a man has a girlfriend/fiancee/wife, he is off limits...forbidden fruit...out of competition..

#35 07-21-2003, 12:47 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Jill1228
Ya know the funny thing? Men who are wearing their wedding ring are MORE likely to get hit on!

What up wit dat?

There could be a different take on it...

As someone who is not single, I am more likely to talk to a married guy out with his single buddies, because my friends can hit up the single guys and I can just chill out and know this guy isn't looking for anything other than conversation (and if he is... NASTY). There's a big difference between that and hitting on, though... I would NEVER hit on a married man!

Replying to a comment from the first page...

My fiance wears an engagement ring. And he never takes it off. How lucky am I?

DZHBrown · #36 07-21-2003, 12:49 PM

Well, if he leaves the house and forgot to put it on, I wouldn't be terribly mad. But if he knowingly goes out often (especially to places such as bars or clubs) then you bet I'd be pissed. It's obvious what he's doing.

deltaphi94 · #37 07-21-2003, 05:27 PM

[/B][/Quote]
All couples should spend time apart from each other occasionally, and to say that marrieds should only socialize with marrieds - I don't even want to start on that one. If someone's really your friend, you don't dump them or not do things with them because they're not married and you are (or vice versa).

If a married man or woman can't go out for a night with the boys/girls without getting into trouble, the marriage had problems to begin with. [/B][/QUOTE]

I agree with this. My husband goes and does his thing, and I have friends with whom I will go out from time to time. I also know, whether he's wearing his ring or not, he is not out to portray himself as single. If he were putting on like he were out to hook up, that would be more than a problem. Like you said, if one or the other can't go out without getting into trouble, the marriage had problems from the start.

As for socializing only with other married people... it isn't always so simple as to say that you shouldn't dump your single friends the second you get married. I do have single friends, but most of those I spend more time with are married. It isn't that I care about the marital status of others, but married people just relate to the responsibilities of family life more readily than someone who isn't married. For example, I have a single friend (who still lives with her parents, btw). She'll call wanting to get together, and then will be extremely upset if I can't go because I have to clean the house or have my son. My married friends, on the other hand, have the same duties to tend to and aren't likely to react in such a way. I've also had single friends who cut me off after I got married. So, it can go both ways.

ZTABullwinkle · #38 07-21-2003, 05:48 PM

I am not married, but my husband better be wearing his ring 24/7. (Or have a good reason not to!!!)

I was engaged once to an officer in the military. (THANK GOD I didn't marry him!!) We looked into putting a small cut in the bottom of his ring so if it got caught on something - it would "break away" rather than damage his finger. Ring injuries are called "degloving" and can be quite bad. I have seen quite a few. Pretty nasty!

The other option was to get him a "work" band that he wore while he was on board his ship. But he decided to cheat on me with my best friend...he made the decision for me. NO WEDDING BAND NEEDED!

texas*princess · #39 07-21-2003, 06:05 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by CutiePie2000
It's tantamount to lying and I will have wasted my time taking to someone that's not available, when I could have talked to someone what WAS. Both sexes are guilty of this. But that doesn't mean that it's not ANNOYING.

I definately agree that 'hiding' your availability status (when you're already married/engaged/committed relationship) is like lying.

Hiding things from your significant other & lying to others about your 'status' are both major red flags.

Eclipse · #40 07-21-2003, 06:10 PM

I agree with those who said red flags for a guy who is "situational" about his ring (unless it is safety related like some of you have mentioned).

Funny ring story...

My guy was SOOOOO not into jewlery when we got married. He never even did the earring thing like so many college guys were doing in the 80s, never wore a high school ring. When getting his ring sized he ordered his ring, against the advice of me and the lady in the store, big enough to easily slip over his knuckle. On the 3rd day of our honey moon we were climbing Dunn's River Falls and he decided to take a swim in one of the little pools. When we got back on the bus to go to the hotel I noticed his ring was missing and asked if he had left it in the safe, as I did with my ring. His look said it all. He lost in in the Falls. I bawled my eyes out for about 30 minutes. When we got back to the statesI made him immediately go to the jewlery store and get another one. I am SOOO glad I took the advice of a girlfriend who suggested that I buy him a "starter" ring, until I was sure he would wear it/not lose it. Her husband has lost about 5 rings in 15 years--but then again he is a Marine and refuses not to wear one, even after she told him it was o.k.

I think the ring I bought my hubby was like $45. Seven years later he still has ring #2. He's been hinting for an upgrade....
So, if you are ever in Dunn's River Falls and find a ring engraved with Forever Love SMB to TAB 4-27-96 let me know!!

texas*princess · #41 07-21-2003, 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Eclipse
Her husband has lost about 5 rings in 15 years--but then again he is a Marine and refuses not to wear one, even after she told him it was o.k.

that's so sweet

aephi alum · #42 07-21-2003, 06:57 PM

Some men don't like to wear jewelry.

Some men, and some women, work in professions where it's dangerous to wear a ring. In that case, safety first - the ring stays off.

And sometimes you just forget to put it on in the morning.

But if someone normally wears a wedding ring, but takes it off for a night out with the guys or the girls, big red flag.

My husband almost always wears his engagement and wedding rings. Trust me, if he went out with the guys and left them at home, he'd get an earful

Munchkin03 · #43 07-21-2003, 08:10 PM

Okay, the guys wearing engagement rings intrigues me. What do they look like? Are they just bands? Did you buy them? When did you start wearing them?

I ask because the boy and I have been wearing matching claddaghs for almost 2 years now. I know mine is being upgraded to a diamond or emerald solitaire sometime soon, but I wanted to do something similar to that for him.

Neither of my parents wear their wedding bands. My father because he never had one, my mother because she just didn't like the idea.

Peaches-n-Cream · #44 07-21-2003, 08:11 PM

I have never heard of an engagement ring for a man. Can someone please explain this to me? Thanks.

As for married men in bars, my friends and I went out one night and met a few guys. One guy kept hitting on one of my friends. I heard one of the guys say something about a wife. I looked at the guy hitting on my friend and his left hand was in his pocket. I asked him what time it was just to be a pain

. He bent his head over and looked at his watch without removing his hand from his pocket. He didn't want to show his wedding band. I told my friend that he was married, and we got out of there fast.

texas*princess · #45 07-21-2003, 10:52 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by Cream
I have never heard of an engagement ring for a man. Can someone please explain this to me? Thanks.

I've never heard of engagement rings for guys either?

Quote:

As for married men in bars, my friends and I went out one night and met a few guys. One guy kept hitting on one of my friends. I heard one of the guys say something about a wife. I looked at the guy hitting on my friend and his left hand was in his pocket. I asked him what time it was just to be a pain . He bent his head over and looked at his watch without removing his hand from his pocket. He didn't want to show his wedding band. I told my friend that he was married, and we got out of there fast.

what a dirtbag!