aprilxo, I'm sorry to hear about your friend.
Kudos to anyone who has made the decision not to drink, especially recovering alcoholics! Kudos, too, to the designated drivers who choose not to drink at a particular event so that everyone can get home safely.
I do drink, as do most of my friends and family. When I go out with my nondrinking friends, I might or might not have a drink... it depends on how I feel and whether I have to drive. When I visit my nondrinking friends' homes, I'll gladly accept a glass of water or soda... you can absolutely have a good time without alcohol, and even if they invited me to bring beer or wine, I'd feel awkward doing so. When they visit me, I'll offer them water or soda, though I myself might have a glass of wine or a martini.
No one has ever lectured me about my decision to drink, nor would I ever lecture someone on their decision to not drink.