A Word of Caution to PNMs

[Alumiyum]

There's always the option of...just not reading them.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

There's always the option of...just not reading them.

No shit. You'll note I did not say "Don't do it because i don't read them."

They end up being hilarious and dramarific because PNMs are dumb, moms are helicopter parents, and no one's special snowflake is that interesting. Nor are GCers actually "helping" when they're flat out wrong about campuses they've never attended but are internet experts on exactly how dress A will look on PNM B.

And retro ones are just boring and rarely get finished. Really what's the point in a blow by blow except as mental masturbation, or a circle jerk by the other GCers - to use a metaphor.

[Chicago88]

This may sound silly but does posting questions about a certain university rush look bad?

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by Chicago88

This may sound silly but does posting questions about a certain university rush look bad?

"I didn't see my university listed in the thread where you absolutely need recs. Would you suggest getting recs for State U?" - Fine.


"I wanna know about the reputation of XYZ, PQD (or just "the sororities") at State U." - NOT Fine.


"Would you wear Lilly to Round 3 at State U?" - Fine.


"Would you wear a pink Lilly polo with Palm Beach fit Limeaid Floater Lilly pants?" - NOT fine.

[Chicago88]

Ok so just general questions not specifics

[AlphaFrog]

Originally Posted by Chicago88

Ok so just general questions not specifics

Exactly. But search first...chances are that the question has already been answered before.

[Jen]

And be aware that if you DO ask about a specific school, you've now told all of GC where you go to school. This is why the search function is awesome.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

No shit. You'll note I did not say "Don't do it because i don't read them."

They end up being hilarious and dramarific because PNMs are dumb, moms are helicopter parents, and no one's special snowflake is that interesting. Nor are GCers actually "helping" when they're flat out wrong about campuses they've never attended but are internet experts on exactly how dress A will look on PNM B.

And retro ones are just boring and rarely get finished. Really what's the point in a blow by blow except as mental masturbation, or a circle jerk by the other GCers - to use a metaphor.

The point is that not everyone shares your opinion. Nor does everyone else think having interest in the stories of others equates to a "circle jerk".

If they want to post about something they're super excited about, more power to them. If they hurt their own chances in the process, that's on them. If they take only advice from anonymous internet posters instead of also asking their recruitment counselors or Greek life office, that's on them.

[LadyLonghorn]

Here's the thing. Some people are expecting these things to be a big public blows up on GC when they go wrong, but that isn't always the case. The stuff is happening off of GC in the real world in real time. That was definitely the case of the situation this last fall. You would never know what had happened just by reading the thread here unless someone pointed it out to you and you were also able to read between the lines. It definitely isn't my place to point it out.

If you're the PNM and behave poorly here, that's one thing. You are the ultimate master of your destiny. But it isn't fair for anyone other than the PNM to crater her recruitment here.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

The point is that not everyone shares your opinion. Nor does everyone else think having interest in the stories of others equates to a "circle jerk".

If they want to post about something they're super excited about, more power to them. If they hurt their own chances in the process, that's on them. If they take only advice from anonymous internet posters instead of also asking their recruitment counselors or Greek life office, that's on them.

I'm well aware that you do not share my opinion.

The stories are pointless, and never in the best interest of those involved. Only sometimes can they turn out to be neutral, they never truly help, and they frequently hurt.

But you're right, some GCers would just, like, totally, die without any update from specialsnowlfake28940. So feel free to say what they do add to the forum, or how they help the writers do anything. Or why they couldn't be replaced with an intro post saying "Hey I'm a new member of XYZ, I just went through recruitment and enjoyed this, that, and the other. One of the chapters had a hilarious skit, but even so XYZ had my heart from pref night on." Done.

No, instead we can hear the deep, innermost thoughts of the PNM as she decides what shoes to wear and tries to figure out which GCer actually knows wtf they're talking about when they tell her what to wear or how gauche her favorite dress looks.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by LadyLonghorn

Here's the thing. Some people are expecting these things to be a big public blows up on GC when they go wrong, but that isn't always the case. The stuff is happening off of GC in the real world in real time. That was definitely the case of the situation this last fall. You would never know what had happened just by reading the thread here unless someone pointed it out to you and you were also able to read between the lines. It definitely isn't my place to point it out.

If you're the PNM and behave poorly here, that's one thing. You are the ultimate master of your destiny. But it isn't fair for anyone other than the PNM to crater her recruitment here.

My question is: how exactly is a PNM put in a bad situation by a parent who does not post their name, identifying information, or make stupid "that house must be skanks because they dropped my baby blah blah blah" comments?

I dislike the discouraging of parents who might legitimate questions or are excited for their PNM.

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

My question is: how exactly is a PNM put in a bad situation by a parent who does not post their name, identifying information, or make stupid "that house must be skanks because they dropped my baby blah blah blah" comments?

I dislike the discouraging of parents who might legitimate questions or are excited for their PNM.

How is a PNM helped by having a minute by minute update of her recruitment on the internet even if you think* she cannot be identified. How is the parent even helped by that? There's looking for support and then there's recruitment threads. The two have been and continue to be very different on GC.

*And that assumption has been wrong very frequently.

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by Drolefille

I'm well aware that you do not share my opinion.

The stories are pointless, and never in the best interest of those involved. Only sometimes can they turn out to be neutral, they never truly help, and they frequently hurt.

But you're right, some GCers would just, like, totally, die without any update from specialsnowlfake28940. So feel free to say what they do add to the forum, or how they help the writers do anything. Or why they couldn't be replaced with an intro post saying "Hey I'm a new member of XYZ, I just went through recruitment and enjoyed this, that, and the other. One of the chapters had a hilarious skit, but even so XYZ had my heart from pref night on." Done.

No, instead we can hear the deep, innermost thoughts of the PNM as she decides what shoes to wear and tries to figure out which GCer actually knows wtf they're talking about when they tell her what to wear or how gauche her favorite dress looks.

To sum up your post: in your opinion these threads are pointless. Many people feel differently. I personally don't give a damn either way, but am happy for people that are excited enough to come talk about it and dislike the vehement and cutting remarks towards people who do wish to share. Again, more power to them. If they hurt themselves, that's on them...and it's a drawback of everything from this to facebook.

No one has to hear any "innermost thoughts" if they don't want to. I think I've read 2.5 of these types of threads the entire time I've been here.

Originally Posted by Drolefille

How is a PNM helped by having a minute by minute update of her recruitment on the internet even if you think* she cannot be identified. How is the parent even helped by that? There's looking for support and then there's recruitment threads. The two have been and continue to be very different on GC.

*And that assumption has been wrong very frequently.

Because she is excited and wants to talk about it? Why does it have to be a therapy session? It can be nothing more than excited individuals wishing to share and finding tips/advice on the fly.

Furthermore why does it matter? Again, if they mess up, that's on them. Otherwise, it is an entertaining read for some and possibly an outlet for restless PNMs/parents. So what?

[Drolefille]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

To sum up your post: in your opinion these threads are pointless. Many people feel differently. I personally don't give a damn either way, but am happy for people that are excited enough to come talk about it and dislike the vehement and cutting remarks towards people who do wish to share. Again, more power to them. If they hurt themselves, that's on them...and it's a drawback of everything from this to facebook.

No one has to hear any "innermost thoughts" if they don't want to. I think I've read 2.5 of these types of threads the entire time I've been here.



Because she is excited and wants to talk about it? Why does it have to be a therapy session? It can be nothing more than excited individuals wishing to share and finding tips/advice on the fly.

You seem to enjoy stating the obvious and missing the point at the same time. Par for the course for you, hmm?

Glad you're white knighting the happy silent majority on GC who hate "cutting remarks" and enjoy happy fun recruitment threads.

GC should stop encouraging recruitment threads. They're a bad idea for everyone involved. And I will also note, since it was deleted from this thread before, that many of the posters pulling for parent posted threads are parents who have posted one or MANY threads for their own children. Moderators included. Funny that when the mods are criticized for the things they've posted in recruitment threads, they delete the posts involved - I'm speaking about carnation specifically here - and yet they post here about how gee, it's totally cool for parents to post. You know, just be more careful than they were, or something.

It's hypocritical and a circle jerk.

[DrPhil]

Originally Posted by Alumiyum

The point is that not everyone shares your opinion.

This is your favorite phrase. LOL. Overstating the obvious.

I hope the moderators don't edit or close this thread. Let discourse be as it is.