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In southern Ohio, just north of Cincinnati
I beheld a vision, next to the expressway.
Was a 60 foot jesus, with his hands in the air
looks like he’s carved out of butter,
just like at the state fair.
Big butter Jesus
Sweet cream Jesus
Oh country fresh Jesus
Unsalted Jesus
Oh Promise Jesus
Imperial Jesus
Can’t believe it’s not Jesus
Oleo Lord.
Well you see him from the chest up
like he’s about to do a back flip,
like he scored a touchdown
or maybe melting or about to drown.
Well I’ve been to the state fair
seen a cow made out of corn cobs
Garth Brooks made of string cheese
and the virgin out of olives.
Big butter Jesus
Sweet cream Jesus
Oh country fresh Jesus
Unsalted Jesus
Oh Promise Jesus
Imperial Jesus
Can’t believe it’s not Jesus
Oleo Lord.
Shipped in pieces on a flatbed
staring backwards was his big head
Driver stuck in traffic backups
desperately avoiding eye contact
Well don’t make no graven images.
That’s one of the 10 commandments
I hope the grading curve is kindly
You get to heaven with a 90
Big butter Jesus
Sweet cream Jesus
Oh country fresh Jesus
Unsalted Jesus
Oh Promise Jesus
Imperial Jesus
Can’t believe it’s not Jesus
Oleo Lord.
Can’t believe it’s not Jesus,
Oh spread the word.
UPDATED VERSE – following the June 14, 2010 lightning strike that burned the statue to the ground.
One night Big Butter
got hit by lightning
It burned to the frame wire
like a giant grease fire
Some blamed it on Satan,
and boy, that would be frightening
But I thought it was Jesus’ father
who was in charge of lightning
Extra crispy Jesus,
Flaming shot Jesus
Fireball Jesus
Opa Jesus
Charbroiled marshmallow Jesus
Bananas foster Jesus
I’m put out it’s not Jesus
Charcoaly lord
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