Should you join a "lower tier" sorority?

[Ggirl617]

while searching for the UF thread (i didn't find it) i found the controversial thread from bamadad with the PM about Dz. this sickened me. i know it is not recent and maybe shouldn't be brought up again but i am really appauled (sp?)

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Ggirl617

while searching for the UF thread (i didn't find it) i found the controversial thread from bamadad with the PM about Dz. this sickened me. i know it is not recent and maybe shouldn't be brought up again but i am really appauled (sp?)

We don't know what that particular poster who got on BamaDad's ass was smoking, but none of what she said was accurate (i.e. saying DZ was a teachers' sorority, etc).

[oncegreek]

I looked up the "offending thread" and was, of course, appalled. Sickening! But there was something really off- not just off-putting- about it. You've heard of "drunk dialing"? Well, I suspect drunk posting, judging from all of the misspellings and grammatical errors. Also, the tone...I was half suspecting to hear about sequin pantyhose and "that one thing" from the poster addressing bamadad.

[Psi U MC Vito]

Juicy Campus is dead. never heard of Greekrank.com myself.

[Benzgirl]

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

never heard of Greekrank.com myself.

Not as bad as JC but still not great. It's strictly Greek and doesn't attack individuals personally.

[SigmaCat]

I always had an ambivalent sense of the whole tier thing, probably because I went to Berkeley, land of the Greek system that defies categorization. We both did and didn't have a culture that encouraged competition and tier-oriented thinking, and that confused the hell out of a lot of us.

Granted, I graduated before Greekrank and social media were things, but we did all develop at least a vague sense of which chapters were considered "top." That said, even members of said "top" houses might have a hard time articulating why, because most of them simply joined the chapters they liked best, usually where they already had friends.

Honestly, we had quite a few chapters that always met quota and campus total, had high GPAs, and attractive, kind, high-achieving members. It never really made sense to me to try to split hairs on rank, because most chapters were functionally alike. Certainly, they all tapped into different regional networks of friends and acquaintances, and people who were in activities together outside of the house tended to follow each other into one sorority or another, but since most chapters benefitted from the phenomenon, it wasn't exactly an advantage. Honestly, the one thing we could really point to was numbers, and as someone else mentioned upthread, it's not really being judgey or elitist to say that you like a chapter but don't want to be strapped to a sinking ship.

End of day, if you want to be in a sorority, then join one if the opportunity presents itself. If you're so concerned about getting into the "top" house that you'd rather drop out of rush than pledge a mid- or bottom-tier house, then you really weren't all that into Greek life anyway. You wanted to win a popularity contest.

[carnation]

Originally Posted by SigmaCat

Honestly, the one thing we could really point to was numbers, and as someone else mentioned upthread, it's not really being judgey or elitist to say that you like a chapter but don't want to be strapped to a sinking ship.

You know what? This says it all. There's a huge difference.

[WregleXO]

I know a very sweet girl who went through rush twice at her college - her mother had determined what the “top” sororities were on campus and had convinced her daughter that she had to be a member of one of those groups. Each year after she was cut by the “top” groups, daughter would drop out - even though she was still being invited to parties to the groups that her mother deemed not good enough. After her second rush, her mother actually asked me what schools she could transfer to and go through rush as a junior. Luckily she did not go through with the transfer. And the mother quit talking to me after she didn’t need me to write another rec.

[NYCMS]

Originally Posted by WregleXO

I know a very sweet girl who went through rush twice at her college - her mother had determined what the “top” sororities were on campus and had convinced her daughter that she had to be a member of one of those groups. Each year after she was cut by the “top” groups, daughter would drop out - even though she was still being invited to parties to the groups that her mother deemed not good enough. After her second rush, her mother actually asked me what schools she could transfer to and go through rush as a junior. Luckily she did not go through with the transfer. And the mother quit talking to me after she didn’t need me to write another rec.

Is this young woman now out of college? If so, how has she handled being on her own? Because when I see mamas like that, I cringe at the difficulty their children will have into becoming an adult and having to make their own decisions.

[WregleXO]

She graduated this past spring. She is back home and has a job - but I don’t know if she has moved back home or if she has her own place. The family dynamics are very weird.

[carnation]

I'm surprised that she didn't transfer and pledge one of her desired groups and come back and try to affiliate. Though that rarely works.

[Jen]

How different would the experience in a "lower tier" sorority really be?

You'll have sisterhood events. You'll have mixers with some fraternities. You'll have formals and semi formals. Scholarship opportunities. Can participate in Greek week. Will be able to attend regional events, conferences and conventions. Will be able to attend parties, host philanthropy events and volunteer with your philanthropy. So where are the real differences?

Maybe you'll have less numbers than the others (but, potentially, a closer sisterhood)? Maybe your alumnae network in that area will be smaller (especially if you're a newer chapter)? You'll maybe have a better COB program because your formal recruitment style is a bit weaker than others? People might say "they're lower tier"?

I can't think of too many differences, especially when it comes to the social aspect. The low tier sororities at my alma mater and the top tier groups do the exact same things. The experience is the same, ultimately.

[AlphaXi_Husky]

Originally Posted by Jen

How different would the experience in a "lower tier" sorority really be?

You'll have sisterhood events. You'll have mixers with some fraternities. You'll have formals and semi formals. Scholarship opportunities. Can participate in Greek week. Will be able to attend regional events, conferences and conventions. Will be able to attend parties, host philanthropy events and volunteer with your philanthropy. So where are the real differences?

Maybe you'll have less numbers than the others (but, potentially, a closer sisterhood)? Maybe your alumnae network in that area will be smaller (especially if you're a newer chapter)? You'll maybe have a better COB program because your formal recruitment style is a bit weaker than others? People might say "they're lower tier"?

I can't think of too many differences, especially when it comes to the social aspect. The low tier sororities at my alma mater and the top tier groups do the exact same things. The experience is the same, ultimately.

Is it similar? Yes. The same? Not entirely.

One of the bigger differences I can think of is if you're needing to constantly COB (as in not just two or three people). That can be really draining on members and take up time from other activities (school or sorority related). I've worked with chapters who rarely have to COB and those who have to COB constantly. It's a lot more work for the latter chapters and definitely affects chapter dynamics.

And of course, there could be reasons for the need to constantly COB that affects chapter dynamics as well (high turnover indicating poor chapter health).

[33girl]

Originally Posted by AlphaXi_Husky

Is it similar? Yes. The same? Not entirely.

One of the bigger differences I can think of is if you're needing to constantly COB (as in not just two or three people). That can be really draining on members and take up time from other activities (school or sorority related). I've worked with chapters who rarely have to COB and those who have to COB constantly. It's a lot more work for the latter chapters and definitely affects chapter dynamics.

And of course, there could be reasons for the need to constantly COB that affects chapter dynamics as well (high turnover indicating poor chapter health).

Too often, the people telling chapters to COB constantly (as in parties every week) are from chapters who never had to do it and consequently, have no idea what they’re talking about.

How do you do it effectively? Maintain a wish list year round of qualities the chapter is looking for in sisters and women who are possible members. Every sister is in an extracurricular activity outside the sorority where they can meet unaffiliated women. Bring women to meet your closest friends (your sisters) with no pressure. Maintain the friendships you make. The woman who may not want or be able to pledge this fall may be ready for it the next fall and be a much more dedicated member. You should be able to keep the parties to one a month and when it’s time for a pledge class, you can bid women you’ve gotten to truly know.

Most of all, look beyond the freshman class, and don’t just get a list from the Greek life office of the women who weren’t bid and run around pell-mell trying to remember who they were from rush and bidding them. That is a sure way to have crazy amounts of chapter turnover.

Finally I don’t know how a sorority that is far behind in numbers can effectively catch up without having a pledge class in the spring (if formal rush is in the fall). Shoving everyone into one huge class is a sure way for women to feel lost in the shuffle and quit.

[ASTalumna06]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Too often, the people telling chapters to COB constantly (as in parties every week) are from chapters who never had to do it and consequently, have no idea what they’re talking about.

How do you do it effectively? Maintain a wish list year round of qualities the chapter is looking for in sisters and women who are possible members. Every sister is in an extracurricular activity outside the sorority where they can meet unaffiliated women. Bring women to meet your closest friends (your sisters) with no pressure. Maintain the friendships you make. The woman who may not want or be able to pledge this fall may be ready for it the next fall and be a much more dedicated member. You should be able to keep the parties to one a month and when it’s time for a pledge class, you can bid women you’ve gotten to truly know.

Most of all, look beyond the freshman class, and don’t just get a list from the Greek life office of the women who weren’t bid and run around pell-mell trying to remember who they were from rush and bidding them. That is a sure way to have crazy amounts of chapter turnover.

This. The main problem that COB chapters have is that they try and cram those parties into a week or two, bid who they can, and essentially give up after, or they're constantly having parties with a bunch of PNMs and requiring that all sisters are present. That certainly gets exhausting.

Making friends in a more natural way year-round should be the goal.