PNM advice: the importance of personal connections in recruitment

[DesertRose]

Hi.

I just recently joined the GC forum and have been reading through many of the discussions. I appreciate the willingness to help and the candor of the GC members.

I am looking for some advice regarding OOS PNMs. Next year, my daughter will be attending an OOS university and will be going through Recruitment as a freshman. Recruitment week is prior to when school starts and she will have little opportunity to meet any members prior to Recruitment. We have a very strong Greek background in my family (14 of the women went Greek), and she is a legacy at two of the sororities where she will be attending and has a relative in three others. I will be working with her to obtain recs for all of the groups.

Are there any suggestions that you may have to help her with making connections prior to Recruitment?

Thanks!

Also - is it better to have recs from local alumni or from alumni in the area where the University is located? Some of the recs that she will have will be from alumni that do not know her personally.

[irishpipes]

Originally Posted by DesertRose

Hi.

I just recently joined the GC forum and have been reading through many of the discussions. I appreciate the willingness to help and the candor of the GC members.

I am looking for some advice regarding OOS PNMs. Next year, my daughter will be attending an OOS university and will be going through Recruitment as a freshman. Recruitment week is prior to when school starts and she will have little opportunity to meet any members prior to Recruitment. We have a very strong Greek background in my family (14 of the women went Greek), and she is a legacy at two of the sororities where she will be attending and has a relative in three others. I will be working with her to obtain recs for all of the groups.

Are there any suggestions that you may have to help her with making connections prior to Recruitment?

Thanks!

Also - is it better to have recs from local alumni or from alumni in the area where the University is located? Some of the recs that she will have will be from alumni that do not know her personally.

I'm not suggesting that you out her school, but without knowing it, it makes it somewhat difficult to answer this.

If she is going through recruitment at say, the University of Texas, and she didn't go to camp in the hill country or graduate from the right high school, she would have a real uphill battle. If she's going to the University of Illinois, it wouldn't matter much at all.

Having said that, she can't help that she doesn't have those connections, so there's no point dwelling on it now. Does her school have a Panhellenic Preview weekend for HS seniors or an orientation/campus visit program? At some schools this can be a valuable way to meet greek women on campus.

If that is also a no, try to get recs from women who personally know her. A letter written on her behalf by someone who knows her well could be weighted much more than a form that a stranger filled out. She does have time to introduce herself to alumnae, chat with them, answer any questions they have, etc.

Also, be sure her legacy forms are sent in for the applicable groups.

Additionally, keep in mind that OOS PNMs are getting placed at an extremely high rate all over the country. But, like all PNMs, she must be open to any and all groups on campus. If the ABCs only want in-state girls from Camp Mystic and Highland Park, she better be open to the DEFs who are willing to give her a chance.

[DesertRose]

Thanks!

[Pass the Pinot]

It wouldn't be outing you too much to say this if this is the SEC, the big 12, etc. It makes a difference. And by OOS, how out of state? Missouri going to Alabama, Ohio to Tennessee or more like California going to Ole Miss? The closer you are to the school, the more likely you are to find connections. Some of these big southern schools are reaching a much broader population every year; and every year more OOS are getting bids. You might be surprised to find who you know there.

Just like people are told on this site over and over to reach out to people for recs, you need to take the next year to do the same in making personal connections, be it with the NPC girls who may be from your hometown, or local alums that may have a connection to one of your 14 greek family members. Keep digging to find it if your daughter is to have a better than average recruitment next year. With all the neccesary requirements (grades, activities, recs, etc) and no personal connections, she will likely have some choices, but not as many as the well connected girls. Sadly it just comes down to sheer volume of girls in the mix.

We were in a similar boat as you a few years ago, and worked hard to make a handful of connections, most of them with one chapter. Ultimately, this is where my daugher ended up.

In my mind, it just seems like the population of legacies is getting bigger every year, particularly in the SEC. This fall, we have watched several high quality hometown girls get dropped by double and triple legacy houses where the mom, aunt or grandmother attended. They counted on the legacy connection being enough and sadly, it just isn't enough anymore.

[Titchou]

Originally Posted by DesertRose

Hi.

I just recently joined the GC forum and have been reading through many of the discussions. I appreciate the willingness to help and the candor of the GC members.

I am looking for some advice regarding OOS PNMs. Next year, my daughter will be attending an OOS university and will be going through Recruitment as a freshman. Recruitment week is prior to when school starts and she will have little opportunity to meet any members prior to Recruitment. We have a very strong Greek background in my family (14 of the women went Greek), and she is a legacy at two of the sororities where she will be attending and has a relative in three others. I will be working with her to obtain recs for all of the groups.

Are there any suggestions that you may have to help her with making connections prior to Recruitment?

Thanks!

Also - is it better to have recs from local alumni or from alumni in the area where the University is located? Some of the recs that she will have will be from alumni that do not know her personally.

If the school has a "Panhellenic Preview Weekend" in the spring or some other such event, she needs to attend. That will get her started on the connections. Often shining at this event will get her on the chapter's radar and they'll be looking for her down the road. It's especially true at Alabama

[DesertRose]

Hi. Thanks for all the great advice. She is going to a school in the Pacific NW, and we live about 1, 200 miles away.

I will be reaching out to our local NPC tomorrow to start connecting.

[Pass the Pinot]

She is going to a school in the Pacific NW

Oh my! My SEC snobbery is showing! I just naturally assumed it was the center of our little southern universe. I just know you'll find connections, and maybe strike up some new friendships along the way.

[DesertRose]

No offense taken!

Btw I love Pinot!

[TAMUAlphaPhi]

Originally Posted by DesertRose

Hi.

I just recently joined the GC forum and have been reading through many of the discussions. I appreciate the willingness to help and the candor of the GC members.

I am looking for some advice regarding OOS PNMs. Next year, my daughter will be attending an OOS university and will be going through Recruitment as a freshman. Recruitment week is prior to when school starts and she will have little opportunity to meet any members prior to Recruitment. We have a very strong Greek background in my family (14 of the women went Greek), and she is a legacy at two of the sororities where she will be attending and has a relative in three others. I will be working with her to obtain recs for all of the groups.

Are there any suggestions that you may have to help her with making connections prior to Recruitment?

Thanks!

Also - is it better to have recs from local alumni or from alumni in the area where the University is located? Some of the recs that she will have will be from alumni that do not know her personally.

My daughter just finished a very successful (though not flawless) recruitment at an SEC school as an OOS PNM. Until she started recruitment, she essentially knew no one at her university. While I completely agree that personal connections could have worked in her favor -- particularly between the third round and pref (where she saw the most significant cuts), she was able to have a very good week -- including a full schedule through the entire process -- and landed a great chapter that's absolutely the best place for her.

I believe my daughter's success was due to a very strong GPA, a solid resume of activities that included both volunteering and school activities, and having recs for every chapter. She also kept an open mind throughout the process and didn't let minor disappointments -- like finding her first back up chapter on her schedule instead of a favorite -- affect her.

There are some things that your daughter is not going to be able to change in the next 12 months. My guess is that "personal connections" might be one of those. If that's the case, I'd suggest that you encourage your daughter to maximize the factors she has more control over -- grades, activities, finding personal recommendations, and honing conversation skills. Just my two cents . . .

[DesertRose]

Thank you. Great advice from everyone. I really appreciate it!

[AXOrushadvisor]

Desert Rose if you have an opportunity to travel to the university try to tour the chapter houses. With all your connections it will give her an opportunity to meet some girls and get tours.

[DesertRose]

We will be heading out to the school in Spring and touring the chapters at that time.

I will continue to monitor the GC site and post occasionally over the next several months. I have really enjoyed all of the recruitment stories and all of the sage advice from the GC members. After DD goes through recruitment in next Fall, I will post her story.

Thanks again everyone!

quick question. What happens if a girl rates her favorite house a #1, her legacy house a #2.... and then her #1 does not pick her? Does she still get in her legacy house?
Especially if the Univ. uses the quota system so there are limited matches.

The house she is a Legacy at seems very interested but it might be #2 for her...

[Titchou]

Under RFM, if a PNM maximizes her options (attends all parties for which she has an available slot and lists the maximum number of chapters on her bid card), she will get a bid to one of them. And she's going to be on both chapter's bid list, she may just be too far down #1's to match to them, in which case she would go to #2.

And there are not limited matches under quota. Quota isn't set till all women turn in their bid cards so there is room for all of them. ALL women, under RFM, who maximize their options will get a bid - unless, of course, they act poorly at pref or some previously unknown negative information is learned at the last minute and someone drops her.

[33girl]

She posted this same question in an IU thread so that changes things a bit due to the varying sizes of pledge classes.