Easily Offended?? Don't Click Here!!!!

[librasoul22]

Originally posted by Dionysus
*In the organizations cubicle area

LOL...hey, if the circmstances were right...

[Jadey28]

Originally posted by ilovemyglo
Funny story..
mom and I went to dinner last night and we started talking about stuff (I had a few LITeas and She has some beers) and we get on the subject of sex and I am totally honest with her for the first time in my life. She about dies, but handles it really well I thought. Then she started asking me questions like your girlfriends do and I swear she looked me straight in the eye and said "Do you spit or swallow" Good thing I didn't have anything to drink in my mouth cause I would have been a spitter for real!
So then we continue to talk about oral action and she says "I don't know about you but good cunnilingus just makes me want to get F%^$ Hard"
Queue me falling over so hard from laughing that I spilt shrimp linguini everywhere. The entire place was looking at my mother and me.
God help us all!

Sounds like you have an awesome mother! I can't imagine talking to my mom like that and we are pretty close! BTW, I am an exhibitionist and so is my boyfriend

[Dionysus]

Originally posted by librasoul22


I've done 2 off of this list too...I am goig to the club tonight, so maybe I can make it 3 or 4, lol.

Let me guess the two.
1. On your dining room table
2. On a parad float

[librasoul22]

Originally posted by Dionysus


Let me guess the two.
1. On your dining room table
2. On a parad float

Nope!

Wait, dining room table was an option? Okay, three off that list, lol!!

[LXAAlum]

Originally posted by Tom Earp
I am AGAHST at this type of thread and what is being posted!

I would never tell of exploits on this site about my escapades in my much youger days a few years ago!

I must be getting much to mature as some of the things are even beyond my knowledge!

It is like what the hell are you talking about!?

Oh by the way, a Circle Jerk is a Bunch of Jerks floggin the Mule, whipping the weenie, slammin the sausage, priming the pump, etc.!

Ah off to another battle to quell!

LXAALUM, welcome Back!!!!!

Welcome back? I'll tell ya...what the hell happened here on GC?

Two observations:

1: Someone owes me a new keyboard after spraying coffee after reading this thread.

2: We're all going to hell for reading this thread....

[HotDamnImAPhiMu]

Oh wow.

I JUST got on the bandwagon. I swear I'm calling in sick tomorrow to see what y'all come up with!

Since this is CLEARLY a great way to get information -- what's a rim job? I thought it was when a girl used her teeth......?

[ZTAMiami]

Originally posted by HotDamnImAPhiMu
Oh wow.

I JUST got on the bandwagon. I swear I'm calling in sick tomorrow to see what y'all come up with!

Since this is CLEARLY a great way to get information -- what's a rim job? I thought it was when a girl used her teeth......?

Same thing as having your salad tossed. Read back a few pages.

[aephi alum]

LOL @ ilovemyglo - My mother *would* die if we had a conversation even remotely like that. I've been married over 3 years and I think she thinks I'm still a virgin.

[ilovemyglo]

Actually my mother cried when she found out. I was talking to my friend on the phone and I got off and was talking to my mom and told her that my friend and I were laughing because at the end of every letter she would send to her it said "Practice safe sex"
So my mom was like "But SO and SO is a virgin..." and I was like "uhm mom, no she isn't" and my mother got all aghast!! So then she looks at me and says all serious "Well, I guess you are the last virgin out of your friends, huh?" and I wanted to look at her and say, yes mom, I am still a virgin, even after having a boyfriend for three years during the most tumultuous times a person has with their sexual hormones raging throughout their body, I told him no, I was waiting for him to put a ring on my finger so that I could engage in sex with only one man in my entire life and only him.
That didn't happen, though. No matter how bad I wanted it, my brain reacted too fast and I burst out laughing so hard that I peed on myself. Yes folks, I pissed on myself telling my mother that I had banged before. She started CRYING, I mean HUGE TEARS, Puffy face, I think someone has died (just my hymen!) tears. I am laughing, she is crying and saying "Oh GOd, Sarah, Oh GOd" and I couldn't control it. When we finally came to I told her not to worry I didn't regret it and that I made the right decision for me. I then reminded her I was 20 (when this happened) and by that time in her life she was married with a kid. She could just bang dad whenever she wanted and even though I may not be married, I still have desires. After that talk we really opened up about sex. This from the mother who told me if I had sex before marriage I was going into a convent when I was 12. I told my brother what happened and he was sayng "Oh I could lie to her, no problem, I could do it!" and I said, well I thought I could too. Two weeks later we were eating dinner at the table and my mom looked my brother dead in the eye and said "Are you a virgin" my brother proceeded to laugh so hard he had tears in his eyes, my mom turned bright red and my dad and I started rolling!!! Then my brother (tears in his eyes and all) looks at me and says "Your right, you can't stop laughinG!"

Anyone else want to share their "how my parents found out I had nookie before" stories?
BTW My dad didn't care. He pretty much knew, but that being said my poor mom is gullible. Dad just told me to trust my womanly instincts. He was in a band in the 60's- hippy parents are great! (they aren't hippies anymore, but you can always say- but you did it!)

[Honeykiss1974]

Originally posted by librasoul22



HILARIOUS!!

Although I think in the context of THIS thread, this smilie:



looks a little suggestive! LOL

I will now NEVER, EVA be able to look at this smilie in the same light EVER AGAIN!

[valkyrie]

I'll really try anything (except butt sex, which I may have mentioned already) but I don't know...the thought of a McDonald's bathroom really doesn't get me all hot & bothered. They're so, ick!

I think that at least some of the suggestions Ludacris made in "What's Your Fantasy" need to be added to the scavenger hunt list, like:

on the stage at the Ludacris concert
in the back of the VIP (this is my personal favorite)
in a candy store
on the top of an Escalade
in the garden/dirt

Oh, and to anwer the question: exhibitionist, definitely.

[Optimist Prime]

Originally posted by HotDamnImAPhiMu
Oh wow.

I JUST got on the bandwagon. I swear I'm calling in sick tomorrow to see what y'all come up with!

Since this is CLEARLY a great way to get information -- what's a rim job? I thought it was when a girl used her teeth......?

Never use your teeth. EVER. I had a bad experinece with that. It turned red for a week.

[sororitygirl2]

Did anyone mention the 50-yard line yet?

[librasoul22]

Originally posted by valkyrie
[B]I think that at least some of the suggestions Ludacris made in "What's Your Fantasy" need to be added to the scavenger hunt list, like:

on the stage at the Ludacris concert
in the back of the VIP (this is my personal favorite)
in a candy store
on the top of an Escalade
in the garden/dirt

LOL! That whole song is a freaking sexual scavenger hunt. I DOUBT I would do it on stage at the Ludacris concert (cause you know that it's sold out). VIP? Hmmm...could be a possiblity, depending on who exactly is in the VIP.

In the garden/dirt...NEVER. MAYBE if there is a blanket or something between myself and the earth. The grass in the south ain't no joke when it comes to the little creatures and organisms that live in there.

McDonalds bathroom? *dry heave* NEVER! I have NEVER seen a clean McDonalds bathroom.

[Optimist Prime]

I want to have sex:
In a garden
In the woods
By the bank of a river
On a trampoline
In a car (road head)
My professor's desk (not with the professor, just go in there while he is at lunch)
On the stage in the theatre dept.
In an aeroplane
In an airplane