Lavalier?

[BabyPiNK_FL]

I got lavaliered by my TKE boyfriend of three years this past Sunday. He didn't do it at meeting or anything, he just had me close my eyes and put it on. It's so lovely and his chapter really isn't too fussy about it, especially since I've been around for practically forever.

In my chapter, you usually lavalier your little with the sorority letters after a year (or if you're leaving or going alumnae then when you do your alum ceremony since you may not be around if you don't live down here) I'm going to do one of my littles very soon, probably this Thursday. Usually the sisters do silver, but my boyfriend upgraded my original silver one that my big gave me to a gold one (since I was a REALLY good lil and am a very involved sister).

[ealymc]

Originally Posted by PhrozenGod01

Here's an out of the lane question,
Has anybody experienced or heard of a couple going through one of those lavaliering/dropping/pinning ceremonies, and then breaking up a short time later? I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that announcement.

The dreaded "Curse of the Lavaliere!"
With our dropping ceremony that is similar to some of the ones mentioned previously, that has DEFINITELY happened. Shortest period: one month. Sad story. She was then dropped again... this time, a different fraternity. Now she's engaged to a guy from home! More power to her because her powers of persuasion are unmatched! LOL

[DeeZeeOE07]

Originally Posted by PhrozenGod01

Here's an out of the lane question,
Has anybody experienced or heard of a couple going through one of those lavaliering/dropping/pinning ceremonies, and then breaking up a short time later? I'd love to be a fly on the wall for that announcement.

My big sis was dropped by her boyfriend of almost 4 years, but they were basically the worst couple together. They cheated on each other back and forth just for revenge and the only reason he dropped her was because she was bugging him about it and like 4 other girls had gotten dropped that same semester. This was last spring and they broke up this summer. Actually everyone who was dropped that semester broke up soon after. Now everyone's afraid to get "the curse of the drop" haha

[SthrnZeta]

Phrozen - the girl who was lavaliered by a TKE - they broke up less than a year later and now she's engage to someone else.

[shadowyi]

Hmm, how about the other way around? Say the guy isn't in a GLO but the girl is, could she lavalier him?

[BDdelt2010]

I'm thinking about lavaliering my girlfriend and I don't really know how to go about it. I can't ask my brothers because they want to tree me and I think that they are mistaking lavaliering for pinning. Is that correct or am I mistaken? Do I lavalier her? do I make a ceremony out of it or what? Any help would be appreciated.

Beta Delta
Delta Tau Delta

[bmerante]

alright i have a question thats been bugging me forever. what if the guy is in a fraternity but the girl isn't. can he drop her or do both of them have to be Greek?

[bmerante]

can a guy drop a girl that isn't in a sorority???

[kathykd2005]

Yes, unless it is expressly stated not to in his chapter or national by-laws. I've seen numerous non-Greek ladies dropped/lettered/etc.

[NinjaPoodle]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Lavaliering is a sign of commitment to your girlfriend - it's the step that comes before pinning, engagement and marriage.

To the OP - your girlfriend is probably hoping her man will step up and show that he feels strongly about her in this fashion. I think she wants that more than the actual piece of jewelry.

Some schools just don't do it very often. If there aren't a lot of people in committed relationships, it probably won't catch on, Greek school or not. It's not something you just do to everyone you date.

I dont know what fraternity this guy is in ( I couldnt hear the words in the song) but this is a great example of what you're talking about. He pinned her and proposed in front of her entire chapter and I assume his too. I thought it was sweet.

Bryan Hay's Proposal Grab a chair because it's almost 8 minutes long. The "Awww-ing" girls get a bit annoying but overall it's pretty cool.

[KMac]

I'm not sure about everyone else but at our school we do it in a very different order-
1.) Pinning- this was explained to me as an outdated thing that people did in the 50's to show that the couple was "going steady"
2.) Lavalier- the guy can only acceptably do this once (may choose to do it twice if they like, but most people do not) this means that the girl is allowed to wear his letters and he must go through some sort of ritual for this (i.e. treeing ) it is a very big deal and only a few girls receive it.
side note: promise rings are not done often and lavaliers normally replace this.
3.) Engagement- I think you can understand this.

Does anyone else do it this way too?

[Thetagirl218]

Originally Posted by KMac

I'm not sure about everyone else but at our school we do it in a very different order-
1.) Pinning- this was explained to me as an outdated thing that people did in the 50's to show that the couple was "going steady"
2.) Lavalier- the guy can only acceptably do this once (may choose to do it twice if they like, but most people do not) this means that the girl is allowed to wear his letters and he must go through some sort of ritual for this (i.e. treeing ) it is a very big deal and only a few girls receive it.
side note: promise rings are not done often and lavaliers normally replace this.
3.) Engagement- I think you can understand this.

Does anyone else do it this way too?

Thats how I have always understood it. I actually know a few girls who have been pinned by their boyfriends, but it was prior to engagements.

One thing I have always pondered...boys are only supposed to lavalier once...but what about girls accepting more than once?

[TinyDancer98]

At our school lavalierings are much quieter, and I don't think we've ever done a candle pass for someone getting lavaliered (although it is very special and will be announced in chapter, etc). Getting lavaliered means you can wear their letters, but it's done individually by the guy and I don't think there's a ton of chapter involvement. Pinnings, on the other hand, are a huge deal. We do a candle pass (twice around for pinning) and then the pinning itself involves the entirety of the two chapters. The actual pinning ceremony is a school tradition, but it is certainly an event to see and there are often tons of people (greeks and non-greeks alike) crowded around to watch when pinnings happen. Pinning is essentially the step right before engagement and it's a big deal because the entire fraternity (I think most chapters are in the realm of a 75% plus vote) has to approve the girl and deem her worthy of wearing their pin. This usually takes place at the end of a semester during the girl's senior year, usually second semester unless one of them is graduating early. Alumni will also come back to pin their girlfriends if the girl is younger.

[KMac]

Originally Posted by TinyDancer98

At our school lavalierings are much quieter, and I don't think we've ever done a candle pass for someone getting lavaliered (although it is very special and will be announced in chapter, etc). Getting lavaliered means you can wear their letters, but it's done individually by the guy and I don't think there's a ton of chapter involvement. Pinnings, on the other hand, are a huge deal. We do a candle pass (twice around for pinning) and then the pinning itself involves the entirety of the two chapters. The actual pinning ceremony is a school tradition, but it is certainly an event to see and there are often tons of people (greeks and non-greeks alike) crowded around to watch when pinnings happen. Pinning is essentially the step right before engagement and it's a big deal because the entire fraternity (I think most chapters are in the realm of a 75% plus vote) has to approve the girl and deem her worthy of wearing their pin. This usually takes place at the end of a semester during the girl's senior year, usually second semester unless one of them is graduating early. Alumni will also come back to pin their girlfriends if the girl is younger.

That's crazy- in a great way-. No one does any kind of pinning really at our school. The lavalier is a pretty big deal, we pass a candle twice for the lavalier and only once for pinning. That is a pretty amazing thing especially since everyone is involved, I kinda wish that was a tradition at our school but we have a very small greek system so that could be part of the reason

[DoveloveSigma]

We do what has been said by alot of other greeks. twice around the candle is lavaliered (And yes we see it as a promise ring, or pre-engagment. Some chapters see it as more important than others) 3 times is engagment, 4 is pregnancy.

However, what we do differently then what I have read is when you want to wear your own letters as your lavalier. You can't by your own (bad karma).. So what we do is your big sister lavaliers you when she feels you have "earned" it. It means you have acomplished a goal that you set for yourself, your graduating, you made a big commitment to the chapter.. etc! For instance, I was the Recruitment chair and I got mine on our bid day, after the hassle of recruitment is over! Each family gives theres at different time, but your suppose to get it sometime before your big sister goes alum!