Does college delay real world maturity?

[AGDee]

I think it varies even between those who go away to college and those who live at home while in college. I think of college as a half-way house in life, a bridge between dependence and independence. You have to start to learn to become self sufficient but, for the typical student, there is still a safety net in the parental units at home. You have to learn to cook and do laundry, balance your checkbook, budget your money, etc. You have to become more assertive in handling things when they go wrong with registration, roommates who don't pay their share of the phone bill, etc. I think it's a valuable experience that helps ease the transition.

ETA: Good to see you posting here again, James.

[tld221]

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

Now, is it not true, that is where the GLOs come in to focus for the finer things of after college education? Oh, say social functioning, running a small business of officership, accounting, recruitment, social functions, ECT?

I learned things such as this is what Business Recruiters are looking for. GPA, and running or being a member of a GLO.

So, I guess there is a very valuable reason GLOs are looked at at least the first time they get a job.

if im understanding you correctly (and who know with an Earp post), i feel like your last statement contradicts the one before it.

if GLO members are more likely to be exposed to "the finer things after college" ie social functioning, business dinners, presentation skils, leadership ability, etc. then shouldnt that make us looked at the most when pursuing work after college?

or, does that work as a disavantage because we potentially have these skills and therefore makes us less impressionable?

[KatieKate1244]

Yes, college delays "Real world" maturity. One of my greatest sources of entertainment right now is spelling out dirty words on my Lite Brite. Who does that past the age of 30?

The article on over-progammed kids was interesting. However, neither me or any of the kids I can recall growing up were ever over-programmed. I played soccer for a few years in grade school, but we had practice Thursday nights and a game on Saturday and that was it. I had never heard of traveling teams until I was in middle school. However, it was different for my little sister (whose 15). She wanted to play T-Ball when she was roughly 6 years old, but my mom thought all the local leagues were too competitive (not to mention most of the kids had already been playing in the league for a year or two). I think the delay on maturity comes from the the pressure parents are putting on kids nowadays, and they really don't get much of a childhood.

[Tom Earp]

Originally Posted by AGDee

I think it varies even between those who go away to college and those who live at home while in college. I think of college as a half-way house in life, a bridge between dependence and independence. You have to start to learn to become self sufficient but, for the typical student, there is still a safety net in the parental units at home. You have to learn to cook and do laundry, balance your checkbook, budget your money, etc. You have to become more assertive in handling things when they go wrong with registration, roommates who don't pay their share of the phone bill, etc. I think it's a valuable experience that helps ease the transition.

ETA: Good to see you posting here again, James.

How true it is ?

Second school, had roommates in an apartment and lived and ate well! While we thought of af a neato place it was a dump, but it was our palace. Went to the laundry mat weeklly to do laundry, the grocery store to buy food for three guys!

Living in a GLO with house mother, we did clean up as pledges and still went to wash clothse .

When started a local did all of the above! Still!


I now what you are refering to! Mamas Boy/Daughter neeed to come home for help! Oh, and do dirty clothes. Except, I learned to do that early on!

Guess age does make a difference!!!

But GLOs do give a better perspective if only it is learned!

[LeslieAGD]

I teach high school students and they are exactly like the article TxAPhi posted. They think they are just "due" because they show up. I have had so many problems with kids asking me to change grades or parents who think their child is "so close" to the next grade that they should automatically get the grade they want. It is so annoying!

[KSigkid]

Originally Posted by Tom Earp

Thanks!!!

Excellent question!

Do Colleges Prepare Students of the after college life? No. They teach Robotic people. Go to class, study, get grades and graduate.

Are they prepared for the after college life, of course not.

I think this statement generalizes the point too much.

That is, there are situations where people go from small towns to big city schools, or vice versa. There are situations where people are working their way through school, juggling full-time jobs with full class schedules. There are also situations where people do learn a great deal in college that they are able to directly translate into their post-collegiate lives, whether it be from classes or relationships.

Is someone who never went to college more likely to mature faster than someone who went to school? What about distance away from home?

I just think there are too many variables associated with the college experience. For me, I think college accelerated my maturity. For others, I can see where it was a break from maturity. I don't think either is necessarily a bad thing.

[Jimmy Choo]

Originally Posted by AchtungBaby80

Of course college delays "real world maturity." That's what's so great about it! Who wants to be a hardened, jaded, world-weary person by their 21st birthday? Not me! I look at myself and the kids I graduated with who didn't go to school and got married at 18, and I'm thinking, "Whoa...glad I didn't go down that road"...because now those people have multiple kids, way too much responsibility, and they've never experienced anything except their hometown. College is a good thing!

I agree with his completely!! I grew up in a small, rural area. The night I graduated high school I saw a guy propose to his sweetheart. While I was personaly appauled, most of my class thought it was cute. Where are those two now? Divorced and both have been remarried 2 more times. So 13 years out of high school they both have multiple children and multiple failed marriages. For the kids who didn't leave our town and go to college, that story is fairly typical of what their life was like. I'm tickled pink that college delayed the onset of those types of adult issues!!!!

[BigRedBeta]

I absolutely think being a student does delay maturity.

Being in medical school and thus, still in that student phase, I look at my friends with jobs and feel like they're a lot more mature than I am. I often feel very young in a non-medical school group of people my age. And when I consider what I'll be like as a 25 year old 4th year medical student (or looking at my friends who are 4th years) it doesn't seem like I'll be the same as the people who have held a job for 4 years while I've been in school.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by Betarulz!

getting just totally wasted on a thursday night. You can't do that in the real world (or so I've been told )

You have been lied to.

How much or how little fun you have, how seriously or not seriously you take yourself, is up to you. All the options are out there if you look and if you don't get hung up on smallminded people telling you how you SHOULD be.

[RU OX Alum]

did college prepare me?

moreso than highschool, but not really

I could trust maybe 1/3 of my professors wanted me to learn something.

That was a drastic improvement from highschool

[shinerbock]

Depends on the person, depends on the college. I think it somewhat delays reality, but for me and people I know it fostered some maturity. I mean, sure, you get drunk a lot and whatnot, but thats only half of it. During the 2004 elections, tailgating on campus was like tailgating at a campaign rally. Plus, when your tailgates and fraternity gatherings include CEO's and congressmen, you obviously get experience networking. I think at SEC schools and others, there is some amount of pressure to dress and act in a more adult manner, which I think is beneficial. At our fraternity, our late night drunken conversations at the bar would often turn into projecting the 08 race, financial markets, etc...Which is something I can't do with some of my older friends who went to other schools. So I think it obviously delays the real world, but in some situations it can make the transition a lot more smooth.

[DeltAlum]

This is a bit of a digression, but I think related thought which may reflect somewhat on the question -- and perhaps a reason that colleges work the way they do.

I had an English Lit professor (very young PHd) in college who went off on a real tangent one day in class talking about his theory that the real reason for college as we know it in this country is to keep "us" off the real world job market for four years. (or more)

His thought was that high school graduates, by and large, lack the skills to participate in industry, etc.

He felt that there should be a mandatory four year government service -- be it military, Peace Corp, etc. Considering that it was the middle of the Vietnam War, this was not a particularly popular thought on campus.

His contention was that during those four years of maturing, we would all learn a lot about life, ourselves and how to organize our time, which would make us much better students and more ready to learn.

I must say that "non traditional" students who had come back from Vietnam did have a maturity and sense of purpose that many of us didn't seem to. That is not to say that they didn't do their share of hell raising.

Personally, I dropped out of school to take a job with only a quarter left, and when I finally returned to finish several years and much experience later, I found it much easier to study and finishing the degree did seem more important to me.

Having said that, with the experiences (life and professional) I had at that time, the degree probably was not necessary. It just seemed like a sentence in my life that didn't have a period at the end, so I felt compelled to finish.

Finally, as I've said before, what I learned in my major area of study, even at a recognized leader in that area, didn't teach me much of how the broadcast industry really was/is. Many people will tell you that you will learn more in your first few months on the job than you learned during your entire college career.

That's the way it was with me -- and when I finished my degree, the honest professors actually told me that they had learned a lot from me.

And I'm not that bright.

[VeniceIsSinking]

IMO:
Not only does it delay maturity, it also delays a serious reality-check. Sure college is about having fun and getting a great education in the process, but when students skip right to, I think they miss out on a lot of valuable life lessons. I can't tell you how many of my peers I see on a daily basis taking their higher-education for granted by literally not learning. You can't expect to learn if you don't do any homework and don't show up to class because you're hung-over from that rockin' party you went to. There are millions of teenagers that cannot go to college because they cannot afford it, while these kind of people get to take the spot of someone who truly deserves it. Sure people have their whole lives, but having maturity that is at least equivalent with your age group will make a big impact on your overall quality of life. The more mature you, the better decsions you make, the more confident you appear in interviews etc.

I'm honestly glad that things worked out the way they did for me. Sure I'm a bit older then my freshmen peers, but I value every minute of my education. I worked in the real world for 3 years and saw how a degree will take you so much further in life. So I'm not taking any moment in college for granted.

Which leads me to another point... a lot of college students leave undergrad thinking they will instantly land a $60,000+ job. If you graduate from an extremely prestigous school and have some great resources to utilize, then this may be true. However, most students don't have the previously mentioned advantages and are devestated when they realize they won't get that dream job right off the bat. Spending some time out in the workforce during school or before it shows you that experience goes a looonnng way. Most likely when students leave school they have no experience in their field, meaning they will get paid less. I had to go through this struggle with my husband who is incredibly bright, had an excellent gpa, lots of activities and did some networking. Needless to say he didn't get his dream job and began feeling pretty down. He refused to understand that having a college degree doesn't mean you will be able to skip all of the b.s. You just get to skip out on some of it! Many of his peers he graduated with suffered from the same "Why did I even bother?" syndrome.

This is life, darlings, the things you want aren't just handed to you on a silver platter. You have to be willing to work for it. Plus you can only put off the real world so long. THe sooner you realize what its like out there, the easier it will be to cope. I think that's a lesson that many students coming out of college miss out on...

[macallan25]

"Its not the grades you make.....but the hands you shake."

[adpiucf]

I think just being that age in general delays real world maturity. College is a bubble. I think it should be treated less as the culmination of your high school achievements and more as a cushion to embrace failure. I'm not saying you should try to fail every class, but it's ok to try something new (as long as it is legal) or to not succeed at something. I think I speak for many of us when I say that I've learned more from my mistakes than my successes.

That also being said, I think a lot of young people would benefit from a gap year between high school and college. Whether you work or travel, or have a combination of both, I think it would be extremely beneficial for the average traditional 18-year old to get up off his arse, work to pay for his own rent without mom and dad's help, and to take that once in a lifetime chance to spend a month abroad taking in cultural highlights or volunteering with a third world country, a rural Appalachian community or an inner city Head Start program. I think he'd come into college with a few missed hours at work because he slept through his alarm, and the memories of the repercussions, a few hangovers and the memories of the repercussions, and a few dissapointments, rejections and setbacks and the satisfaction of knowing the sky wouldn't fall because someone didn't want whatever you were selling. And possibly, yes, some maturity. I think he'd take school a little more seriously. I would hope, anyway, that he would have a stronger focus. But that's unpredictable and depends on the person. A year will make some difference, but there is still plenty of maturing to do, not to mention the peer pressure that can influence the most mature and rational person to make some really stupid decisions.

Whether you go straight to college or take time off, you have unreal expectations. Kids in the US have unreal self-esteem because they have been built up and told how great they are by their family, friends and teachers. Not everyone can be the valedictorian, but it seems more and more schools don't want to reward the hardest workers on actual merit. Everyone needs to feel like a winner! There have to be losers, too-- you have to have some incentive to want to try harder.

And we're so confident that we're the best because everyone has told us our entire lives that we're the best-- And we still can't do math because we're too busy congratulating ourselves on winning a blue ribbon at the pony rides at the petting zoo. The trouble is that everyone else who rode the pony rides got the same damn blue ribbon. I like Ricky Bobby's take on things: "If you're not first, you're last," right? Ranking matters. There can't be 100 people in a group of 100 who are first place winners.

We may not be mature at 18, but we sure are confident.

So no, college doesn't necessarily delay real world maturty. Age delays real world maturity. College helps soften the blow a little bit.

And if I ever have kids, they're taking a year off to attend the School of Hard Knocks so that when college comes around, they get more out of it. I wish I had.