Do you care about getting married? - Page 2

PhoenixAzul · #1 11-12-2004, 02:57 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by valkyrie
Why don't you propose?

Well, I was the one who initiated the action in this relationship. We have a 5 year age difference, and I definitely had to be aggressive to get him to consider me. But this is the one instance, the only instance, where I will not do the asking. I've always been the initiator, kissing, dating, etc etc. This is ONE TIME I want him to do this on his own. Plus my parents want him to ask for permission. My dad won't give him permission unless he has a ring...my dad proposed to my mom without a ring, and now he's totally against it...kinda odd.

NinjaPoodle · #2 11-12-2004, 03:04 PM

Do you care about getting married?

Nope. Got better things to worry about

norcalchick · #3 11-12-2004, 06:31 PM

Quote:

Its about having kids and raising them with two parents.

Yeah. That's one reason I would want to be married. I also don't want to have to explain or have my kids explain to their friends or who ever that thier mommy and daddy aren't married, but have boyfriend and girlfriend for a long time. The kids see parents as being married, having last names, etc.

emleepc · #4 11-12-2004, 06:52 PM

I do care. It's something that I do want in my life, definitely, but not right now. I'm not ready. But one day......

AKA_Monet · #5 11-12-2004, 09:31 PM

I cared about getting married, but I waited until I was 34ish-35 years old...

I HIGHLY suggest that if you truly know yourself and you do find that magical person that you want to marry that you seriously have "marriage education"...

Many churches have these kinds of classes... If you can ignore the religious connotations, then the actual classes are pretty good because they teach you on how to argue, fairly rather than explosive arguing...

But secular marriage education classes are on the lines of that from The Gottman Institute that teaches you how to be in a relationship with somebody else...

Do a "google search" on marriage education/enrichment and you will find that there is a whole subculture out there on improving the quality of lives of couples. The government has an invested interest in this prospect because it releases funds lost when a couple divorces and one spouse becomes destituted--especially along with children...

Divorces do impact the state monetarily... The issue is when couples divorce at no fault (i.e. they are tired of each other--irreconciable differences) there are some courts that will force the couple to go through some level and months of counseling before the divorce decree is signed... That is true with states that have covenant marriage laws.

So at some level, I'd say in the next decade or so, marriages will be rather rare and couples will cease the knowing the logic of being married. And those fancy free and foot loose single at 40 something will be the norm, whereas those who are married with children will be the oddballs... Folks will still be in monagomous relationships, but the legalities will not be there of a maritial relationship. And marriage will be like going and joining a church--something that seriously religious/spiritual folks do...

AlphaSigOU · #6 11-12-2004, 11:21 PM

Nope. No wife, no kids, and in no hurry for either.

Peaches-n-Cream · #7 11-13-2004, 12:57 AM

I think about it, but I'm not worried about getting married. I am happy the way things are right now. Maybe that will change one day.

Taualumna · #8 11-13-2004, 01:00 AM

I'd like to get married...or at least move out (I have a feeling my parents want me to live at home until I'm married....cultural issues, you know?)...my parents' tastes are a little too much on the modern/contemporary side for me. There are some things that are nice, but there are also things we have that aren't!

chideltjen · #9 11-13-2004, 02:09 AM

I'd like to eventually. But at my age... I couldn't dream of being permanently attached to one guy right now. I'm enjoying my independence and just sorta taking guys as they come and go.

It's funny... the guy I'm sorta seeing now asked about if I ever dressed up as a kid and dreamed about big fairy tale weddings. I didn't really.

dphies00 · #10 11-13-2004, 11:16 AM

I want to get married - definately! - because I really want a family of my own. I've always wanted four or five kids and a husband and a house and soccer practices. Its not so much about getting married as I can't wait to be a mom and have a partner in life. My parents are each others' best friends and will be celebrating 25 years together in April. I can't wait for that kind of friendship and love in a family.

Wait yes I mean I can wait, for chrissake's I'm only 22. I'd like to meet a guy in like three yearsish - or five yearsish - that really inspires me to make the commitment. But definately not right now.

Sistermadly · #11 11-13-2004, 11:47 AM

I didn't care, and if it weren't for the fact that we had to deal with immigration, I would've been happy to live "in sin" with MisterMadly for the rest of my life instead of getting hitched.

It's never been a big priority in my life. I'm glad I found the person who makes me happiest, but on my list of "to dos", marriage was way, way down there.

cash78mere · #12 11-13-2004, 12:13 PM

i definitely care about eventually getting married. my boyfriend and i talk about it all the time, it's just a matter of having enough money for a wedding and house, since we'll be paying for everything ourselves.

i've always been the one to want a husband and kids. i always thought i'd get married young and have 2 kids by now (i'm 26), but obviously that didn't happen.

James · #13 11-13-2004, 12:18 PM

I have no problems with getting "married" so long as I am not legallly and financially liable for the dissolution of that "marrriage" because its a state entity.

Marriage has become a state sponsored economic unit, a sort of mini-corporation. No man in his right mind should enter into a corporate contract that has such an enormous penalty clause for leaving early (before death).

Its just insane.

However, I would agree to any religious or cultural ceremony the lady wanted .. . as long as it isn't llegally binding.

That should make her happy right?

I mean, why would she want more?

ADqtPiMel · #14 11-13-2004, 12:50 PM

Yes, I do care. But obviously, we're waiting until we get out of college at least.

AlphaGamDiva · #15 11-13-2004, 07:51 PM

i want to get married, but i'm not exactly worried about it. i'm only 23....my sister was married at 21 and divorced a year later. she'll be 25 in january and getting married again in may. i wanna find the right one.....not get married b/c everyone else is, or i'm getting older, or i'm bored or whatever......and if that happens, fantastic. if not, i will also be that old bitter lady at the end of the street throwing rocks at little kids when they get into my yard.

both plans sound fun to me.

the only part of that i'm concerned with, is that i DO really wanna have kids. two of my own, and then, like, 6 adopted.

but i don't think i can handle that by myself, ya know?