Thoughts on Elopement?

[Jill1228]

We did the Vegas thang and I wouldn't do it any other way!

[ShaedyKD]

I'm all about it! I would rather use the money that would be spent on the wedding towards a new home. My parents have always encouraged me to elope, jokingly of course...maybe they were serious, who knows! Anyways, I wouldn't expect my parents to pay for my wedding. I'm not all about the whole huge dress/reception/flowers everywhere kind of affair. I don't need that but if I did want it, I'd pay for it myself. Since I don't, I think I would definitely like to elope, or else have an extremely small ceremony followed by a dinner party. My English teacher in high school got married on a cruise ship, I thought that was pretty cool!

[AKA_Monet]

Originally posted by Jill1228
We did the Vegas thang and I wouldn't do it any other way!

I wanted to do the Vegas thang with an Elvis Preacher and Motown singers at the "Chapel of Happiness"... But my now Husband was too afraid and chickened out...

But, my husband and I eloped due to an arguement. His mother had issues with us as a couple "rushing into a relationship" too fast. But being 30-something and not getting any younger, neither he nor I wanted a huge shindig with legions of folks that act ignorant and who never RSVP'ed with the whole gambit of formalized invites... We wanted something small and family oriented...

But it did not turn out to be that way and no formal wedding planning ever is no matter what your belief is... Once you tell a location that you want to have your wedding there, the price goes up 100 fold... Then, once you tell family members, they blab to everybody and they mama's about coming...

My parent's eloped (see my past postings). Their marriage has gone 43 years strong...

The only issue with elopement is hardly any pictures. No bridal shower or bachelor parties. No gifts, but each other. There are a few websites on how one might do it.

But my elopement wasn't not a strictly planned event on my part other than showing up at the Judge's court and an appointed time. And I think it was more meaningful for us, as a couple, to do what we did and share that alone--a story we will tell our great-grandchildren one day...

Parent's do get upset... But they eventually get over it. We are all adults and have to live with our choices in life...

And many people have second ceremonies for the family... Some are 2-4 months after the actual legal marriage, some 1 year to 2 years afterward... I think most folks have 2nd ceremonies because they do not want any family member "carousing" the nupitals into getting "cold feet"... Or, that all the hecticness of actually being loving and married to each other would be missed if the paperwork was signed on the day of the crazy wedding... I dunno.

But I eloped because my now husband asked me to get married on such and such day. And I thought, now or never... When will it EVER be a perfect time to get married for me??? That was me...

[PennyCarter]

I've always thought I'd elope, and my mom always jokingly said she'd give me money for a house to do so (we don't have serious talks about weddings). I always thought this would be the most practical way to go...why spend so much money on a day when I will have student loans and other bills? I don't think anything is wrong with it and it may still be the way to go for me. But my biggest fear is regretting it. Ever since I started dating my boyfriend (who is the first man I can see myself marrying) I've imagined a traditional wedding. This is super odd because I was NEVER the girl who dreamed of weddings or planned it since I was young...I just always thought I'd take the money and run. Anyway...I don't think its bad, if it truly makes the couple happy. I will probably have a wedding (not anytime soon though) that isn't too large and on a limited budget and then splurge on the honeymoon and reception...the fun stuff definitely deserves more money!!!

[labeachgrl]

I say elope if:

you can't financially afford the wedding that everyone will pressure you into giving

your family doesn't want to go to the wedding, but wants to attend the reception

you take a few very important people with you that would make the experience exponentially more special


Don't elope:

when it'll deny both your parents (who love and support you) the sight of seeing their children getting married.

if you're big on rituals/traditions like dad walking you down the aisle (bridal showers, bachelorette parties, rehearsal dinners, post wedding brunch,

if you're parents would be absolutely crushed - like my dad would be if he didn't get to walk me down the aisle or my mom helping me get ready

[texas*princess]

One of my female cousins had the huge traditional church wedding last november that every girl dreams of when they're 7.

After it was all said and done, her brother, who is a couple years younger than she is, told my aunt "This was fun and all, but it's too much ...when I get married, I'll send you and dad a couple of plane tickets, and we'll see you in Vegas"

[AKA_Monet]

Originally posted by labeachgrl
if you're parents would be absolutely crushed - like my dad would be if he didn't get to walk me down the aisle or my mom helping me get ready

That's why folks are having 2 ceremonies: one with the J.P. and the formal ceremony with all the families involved...

Ironically, the one with the Judge in my legal marriage was better than the formal ceremony in Sedona, Arizona... See my other topic--how was your wedding???

[GeekyPenguin]

My parents eloped - this year was their 27th wedding anniversary. My mom drove down to El Paso where my dad was stationed and then when he got moved to Germany, she got a job as a civilian employee (she was a dental hygienist at the time) and went with him. They lived in Germany for a few years, then came home, built a house, and had me. Elopement was the best option for them for a variety of reasons.

The funny part is I never knew they eloped until I was SEVENTEEN - we had no wedding pictures lying around our house and I never even noticed. My friends families don't have wedding pictures out because most of them had shotgun weddings with a very pregnant bride, so I didn't think it was abnormal that we never had them out either.

GPDad has offered me a LARGE sum of money to elope but I think I want a church wedding.

[Munchkin03]

The Munchkin-parents eloped. They've been married over 30 years.

The Munchkin-grandparents eloped. They went diamond in June.

But, that's not happening for me. We both have large families and lots of friends we want to celebrate with. If money was an issue, we were really young, one of us was in danger of losing insurance, or a move was imminent, I'd be all about it. But, as it's not like that. So there will be a shindig like no other. I got to attend some weddings while I lived in Rome, and I wouldn't mind having an old-fashioned Italian wedding.