where are YOUUR babies: spin off of why arent you married - Page 2

MIDWESTDIVA · #1 06-15-2004, 11:30 AM

I'll be 30 this year and I don't have children. First, I'm not married and second, the lifestyle change that parenthood creates doesn't appeal to me.

Several people have told me that I'm selfish for not wanting children. Oh well. It's nice to know that having children automatically makes a person generous.

TRSimon · #2 06-15-2004, 05:23 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MIDWESTDIVA
I'll be 30 this year and I don't have children. First, I'm not married and second, the lifestyle change that parenthood creates doesn't appeal to me.

Several people have told me that I'm selfish for not wanting children. Oh well. It's nice to know that having children automatically makes a person generous.

Wow!! There must be some really tacky people in y'alls circles... I mean, asking someone when they are going to have kids is bad manners enough.

jojapeach · #3 06-16-2004, 10:20 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MIDWESTDIVA
Several people have told me that I'm selfish for not wanting children. Oh well. It's nice to know that having children automatically makes a person generous.

They're narrow-minded idiots. You're being more generous for not having kids that didn't ask to be here but still have to be taken care of. I actually heard on Clark Howard's radio show (such good money advice!) that adolescence has started to stretch until 24 because of all the young adults returning home. That's 18-24 years of responsibility...for a life besides your own.

People like us that know we don't want kids are doing society a favor by not having kids that may become dysfunctional because they were raised by parents that didn't want them and may possibly resent their existence. Hmph...

reddawn18 · #4 06-18-2004, 11:35 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by cammykaze1920
I hear the 'When are you gonna be married/have kids' line at least once a week from my parents.

I get it from my half sister. Her line is, "I don't want my child to be the only one in her generation!"

I *politely* told her to have another kid then!

ntrestednsgr · #5 06-19-2004, 10:29 AM

ntrestednsgr · #6 06-19-2004, 10:32 AM

I agree 110% w/Steelstrap, Cali is ridiculous w/the cost of living. I can barely afford to breath in L.A County. I think I need to relocate to South Dakota or Wyoming.

Eirene_DGP · #7 06-24-2004, 02:06 PM

Oh, I get this all the time. The worst and most embarrassing part is that I have gained a lot of weight since I left home and graduated college and people who haven't seen me in a while always ask if I'm pregnant.

Steeltrap · #8 06-24-2004, 02:12 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by ntrestednsgr
I agree 110% w/Steelstrap, Cali is ridiculous w/the cost of living. I can barely afford to breath in L.A County. I think I need to relocate to South Dakota or Wyoming.

Naaah, playah. Don't relocate to either of those places. Even Las Vegas is better than that.

Conskeeted7 · #9 06-26-2004, 03:06 PM

I've been married a little over a year and am constantly asked when am I going to have kids. I think that it is very rude for anyone except for the closest of friends and family to ask this, but not even those people have the right to be annoying with it.

What if I was having infertility issues and wanted to keep it private? I just think it's inappropiate to think that everyone woman under 30 and without children deserves to be questioned on her life choices.

I don't like to explain myself. The only ones responsible for making this decision (my hubby, me, and God) have already had this conversation and when we're ready to have children...the world will know.

winneythepooh7 · #10 06-26-2004, 03:13 PM

Well I am still young I think, 28 and only getting started in my life. I chose career over marriage and kids and I am happy in my choice. You know, last summer I had my 10 year high school reunion and I was extremely offended (as were others) because in the "Memory Book" that was made about what everyone has done with their life, everyone who had kids had paragraphs written about them and their kids. For those of us who are single or in some cases, divorced, that was written in big bold letters under our name. A little blurb was written about what we were currently doing. Not to toot my own horn but I think I have accomplished a lot since highschool. Under my name it said "Single, works in mental health agency, in graduate school". I guess if I had kids at the time I would be one of the CHOSEN and WORTHY LOL. Needless to say I left early because I felt like I didn't have much in common with anyone and most of the people who showed all still live in the same town and are on like kid #6 or something. Okay vent over............

Queencece · #11 06-28-2004, 07:47 PM

I am 22, single and no kids.

I had to be about 19 or 20, but do you know what my mother said to me. We were at the mall and there was no parking up close to the door, but way in the back (Sat afternoon, beautiful day). She saw one spot open and it was a maturnity spot for expectant mothers. She turned to me and said "Too bad you ain't pregnant". I just looked at her and my mouth was on the floor. I was like how can you say that and for a parking spot. I didnt talk to her for at least a week after that day. She apologized for it, but I will NEVER forget that.

I mean come on now. She won't even mention kids in my presence. I do have a 2 yrs old nephew who has been with me on some weekends and everyone always says that I am getting ready to have my own. I go not a chance in h#ll. At least give me another 5-6 yrs.

Q

Chiante9 · #12 06-30-2004, 03:46 PM

I'm a single mom with an eleven-year daughter and I still get asked when am I going to have more kids. My response is "a baby out of wedlock-been there, done that" so "no husband-no baby"!

rho4life · #13 02-16-2006, 05:48 PM

I LOVE babies. Doesn't mean I want one. Recently a friend's mom [whose daughter just got pregnant] kept saying "Oh Rho4Life, you look so good holding the baby! When are your having one?"

My response was, of course I look good, but I'm not having any babies."

Alouette · #14 02-16-2006, 07:40 PM

I feel y'all. I didn't marry until I was 31 and just had my first at 36. Between 31 and 36 I was CONSTANTLY harrassed about children. It wasn't the right time.

It just isn't anyone's business.

I have people NOW asking me: When are you going to have the next one?

Can I recover from the first one, please?!

GoldenGlow2000 · #15 02-17-2006, 02:00 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by MIDWESTDIVA
I'll be 30 this year and I don't have children. First, I'm not married and second, the lifestyle change that parenthood creates doesn't appeal to me.

Several people have told me that I'm selfish for not wanting children. Oh well. It's nice to know that having children automatically makes a person generous.

I am 28 years old and get the same thing told to me! I am not married/no kids. Not really looking to have any. If I do, the will be on accident (Sorry). I don't think of it as selfish, I just don't think I could be a complete parent to a child. I have 4 nieces and 1 nephew. I have been around them since birth and have to thank god that they are not mine. I love them but I could not do it everyday on the day. However, I do commend my sisters everyday for being able to and doing it VERY WELL!!