DO NOT.COM.....

[AKA2D '91]

Big Props to MN...
you are soooooo krazy!

ROTFLMAKAAO!

YOU ALL ARE MAKING ME FEEL MUCH BETTER!

[Audacity44]

**DO NOT wear combs in your hair(not hair combs, but the combs you use to comb your hair)
**DO NOT ask me "Do I have good credit?(I am a bill collector, not the credit reporting agency)
**DO NOT wear weaves so long that YOU start to belive it is really your hair
**DO NOT tell everyone you have White, Indian, etc in your family because you are fair skinned or have a good grade of hair.
**DO NOT call me at 2a.m. and ask me "What are you doing? That is a given!
**DO NOT wear Pink and Red together, that doesn't match, sorry.
**DO NOT take R's off words. Ex. The word is door not doo(said dough)

Oh well I think I have made my mark!!

[mizzkes]

DO NOT- speak to me in ebonics.
exp. "Hey gul, what 'cho name is?"
DO NOT- get mad when I turn you down.
DO NOT- ask for my notes from class when you have been absent for 3 weeks.
DO NOT- ask for my notes in class when you are sitting right next to me. Why did you not hear the professor? I did.
DO NOT- (Men) wear those tight "muscle shirts". They are tacky. If your muscles are big, believe me, they will be noticeable in a regular shirt that you can breathe in.
DO NOT-(Ladies) wear black stockings with white shoes. Aww damn, just dont wear white dress shoes at all.
DO NOT- let your huge dog jump up on me, and when I am afraid, tell me "he does not bite". Of course he does, he has teeth doesn't he?
DO NOT-(Men) bathe in cologne. A little dab will do. A sista has allergies.
DO NOT- (Men) come to the door with your shirt off, if you have not been to the gym in months. Believe me, it shows.
DO NOT- buy rims that cost more than your car.
DO NOT- wear white deodorant with a sleeveless shirt. The clear stuff really works.
DO NOT-wear a regular bra with spaghetti straps. Strapless bras really work.
DO NOT-(Ladies) loan men money. If their mom won't loan it to them, that should tell you something.
DO NOT-tattoo your neck.
DO NOT-(Ladies)wear a bikini if you have not shaved/waxed the pertinent areas.
DO NOT-ask me to ask my famous friends for autographed 'nalia. They don't keep dozens of extra starter jackets in the closet.
DO NOT-refuse a mint. If it is offered, you probably need it.
DO NOT-play loud, offensive music in your car. That is very country and none of us care to hear what you are listening to.
DO NOT-talk about marriage on the first date, there will be no second date.
DO NOT-ignore this list.


------------------
I'm not conceited, just convinced.

[CONTENTASCANBE]

Do not say same difference. I HATE this. Something can not be the same and different at the same time.

Do not go and spend money on clothes, renter cars, and hotel for the Kappa Beach Party when your home phone is disconnected.

Do not say Oh I am going to be a member of xyz sorority of fraternity.

Do not tell someone that they was wrong for doing something and then you do and try to justify.

Do not wear black and brown together.

[DoggyStyle82]

LADIES:

DO NOT:
A)refer to me as a Q-Dog
B)ask me to bark for you
C)ask me to set out your favorite hop
D)ask me why I am not wearing gold boots
E)ask me if I graduated
F)ask me if we slept with the pearls
G)ask me if a certain stereotype is true, unless you want first-hand knowledge.
H)ignore all of the above if you are asking while naked

DO NOT: remove any clothes during foreplay and then say no
DO NOT: try to hold a serious conversation about our relationship while the game is on
DO NOT: dress like a hoochie and then get offended when treated as such
DO NOT: date brothers from the same chapter
DO NOT: try and kiss a brother after doing that thing. You might get your feelings hurt
DO NOT: ask me to take you to a Meg Ryan movie
DO NOT: make me guess how you feel. Chances are I will be wrong.
DO NOT: compare me with the men from your past failed relationships
DO NOT: start a convo with "we need to talk"
DO NOT: call me homophobic because I don't want to wait for you at the salon
DO NOT: ask a closed ended question and then not really want the answer. "Does this dress make me look fat?" No, you look fine. "I think I better get the other one" "Do I look better in red or blue?" I say red but you wear the blue anyway. UGH. Why ask our opinion if you have your own plan.

[PrettyPetite]

I have to jump in on this one.


When dealing with me, Do NOT, under any circumstances:

1. Call me and tell me that you saw my ex-boyfriend with so-and-so. Like I care...we aren't together anymore!

2. Call me after 1 am Sunday-Thursday, and ask me what I am doing.

3. Get a tattoo with chinese/japanese letters....you don't know what they are putting on your body!

4. (Men) Walk around the beach with no shirt on...and you have a bird chest or a beer belly.

5. Ask to ride with me to the club, then get mad at me because I refuse to get you there before 10 so you can get in free (why are you going to the club with no money ANYWAY?!?!

6. Call me and ask me what I'm doing, and when I tell you I'm sleeping, try to hold a conversation with me anyway


7. Send me email where I have to scroll through email addresses for five minutes just to read a stupid 3 line forward.

8. (men) Try to get my attention by saying, "Hey Mami" or "Hey Red" (I can't believe they still say that) or anything of that nature

9. Tell me that you aren't cold because "You are from New York" and it's 40 degrees outside...plus the wind is blowing at 25 mph and all you have on is a t-shirt, shorts, and sneakers

10. Wear a thick winter jacket with a little sundress and sandals on.

11. (Men) Grab my hand while I'm walking by just to get my attention (when I don't know you from Adam)

That's all I can think of for now...


PrettyPetite

[mccoyred]

How about...Do not use IRREGARDLESS, it is not a word!! LOL!

[quote]Originally posted by Traylee:

Originally posted by Ideal08:

DO NOT use "conversate," it's not a word.

Thank you. That is one of my pet peeves.

Here's more...

Do not...

...pull out of a driveway in front of me and slam on the brakes
...pull out in front of the last car in traffic when you could have waited 3 seconds and pulled into a clear lane
...tailgate (and I don't mean football! Go Ravens!)
...drive 55mph in the speed lane
...forward e-mails w/ 2Mb attachments
...forget to change your voicemail at work if you are not going to be in the office, and please leave a backup contact for immediate assistance
...call the backup contact if you do not need an answer that day


...more to come!
------------------
MCCOYRED

Dynamic
Salient
Temperate

Mu Psi '86
BaltCo Alumnae

[This message has been edited by mccoyred (edited January 08, 2001).]

[jazbri]

I'm back with more..

DO NOT wear that backless halter to the club when its 20 degrees outside. You're cutely ridiculous.

DO NOT choose the thong to go with those paper thin pants so that everyone knows you made a bad a$# decision.

DO NOT (men) wear suits that matches a box of crayolas. (PURPLE, SEA-GREEN, MAGENTA, RED) You know what I mean.

DO NOT (men) wear that same suit with matching shoes and hat.

DO NOT (men) wear that dingy white dress shirt that ends before the wrist bone.

DO NOT wear a really nice suit with turned over shoes.

DO NOT (ladies) wear heels that are worn down to the metal.

DO NOT (ladies) wear that midriff top with the serious gut lined with stretch marks.

[Bobby Earl]

This is some very funny stuff.

Here are two more:

Fellas, DO NOT tell a lady that you are also looking for a relationship, soulmate and something permanent in life when you know you just wanna hit. (You will end up like MARTIN on "Thin line between Love and Hate")

Ladies, DO NOT believe a guy when he tells you that he loves and cares some much for you after he just BEAT YOUR A$$.

[MaMaBuddha]

i had to jump on the band wagon as a reformed ghetto girl:


DO NOT: get your three letters and act as if you are to good to chill with your regular friends.

DO NOT: act as if we all have never been a little bit ghetto in your whole life.

DO NOT: forget where you can from.

DO NOT: to want to be a DELTA because you heard we were the best steppers.

my truely ghetto people

DO NOT: ask me if we finna go to the sto (i emphasize with the slang, but ebonics? No)

DO NOT: use *69 if i accidentally dialed the wrong number by mistake and ask me "did you just call here?"

DO NOT: come up with some crazy behind ghetto name for your newborn.

DO NOT: smack and pop your gum in class when the teacher is talking.

DO NOT:

Men:

DO NOT: leave the seat up in the bathrooom.

DO NOT: forget to give your seat to the elderly lady on the bus or the train

DO NOT: be at the club and grab your crotch when an attractive young lady walks by.

DO NOT: call a young a lady a b*tch when she gives you no play.

DO NOT: wear those tight shirts wear you nipples are showing.

Women

DO NOT: wear those tight behind shoes where you feet will hurt.

DO NOT: post your picture picture on the web from 10 years ago and then look like magila gorilla...

DO NOT: wear the wrong kind makeup for your face.

DO NOT: borrow your friends weave because your is jacked up *i've seen it done*


more to come....

MaMaBuddha

[Eclipse]

Originally posted by MaMaBuddha:

DO NOT: borrow your friends weave because your is jacked up *i've seen it done*


more to come....

MaMaBuddha
[/B]

O.K. MaMaBuddha,
I'll ask....how do you 'borrow' someone's weave? Help a sista out! ha ha ha

[AKAtude]

I'm ROTFLMAO! This is a good thread. I don't think I have anything to add to the list. This has been my comic relief for the day!

[OOHLALA]

AKATUDE: I just figured out what ROFTLMAO, MEANS.....I ride the short yellow bus sometimes.

[prettypoodle6]

do not put bumper stickers on NEW cars.

do not sweat up a machine at the gym and not wipe it off before moving to the next one.

do not wear tight/too small bras thinking it gives the same effect as a push up bra - it doesnt.

do not ask me what E.T.P. stands for on my jacket. #1. that's not my letters and #2 if you insist that's what it looks like, I'll TELL you what ETP stands for....

do not come to an informational (mine or any other sorority's) and your only question for the night is "who are your fraternity brothers?"

do not order a greasy cheeseburger, double chili fries with onions, a side of pork chops, and a DIET coke - WTF?

ladies, do not consider YOURself ballin if your man is the one keeping you in the latest clothes, a nice ride, hair tight, and nails done. Cause if he leaves so will the money..

[DELTABRAT]

Hmm...

DO NOT...

Wear make-up that is 3 shades lighter than your skin tone.

Hug me when you have a ton of make-up on your face.

Hold a conversation with someone driving next to you in a car for like MILES!!!

Wear another sorority's colors to my informational/rush.

Have braces and not brush your teeth after every meal (greens/spincah is the absolut worst).

Lack the understanding of the proper context in which the three there's (there, their, they're) should be used and have graduated from high school/college.

Come up to my window at the drive-thru and ask me to buy you some food.

Ask me for money and when I say I don't have any change tell me you have change for a dollar.

Wear the fluorescent color nail/toenail polish.

Smile REALLY big when there are teeth missing.

Ask me what you could do to lose weight and when I tell you say "Oooh, girl, I can't be doin' all that."

Try to get at me by acting as if you want me to be your personal trainer an you have no intentions on getting in shape.

Schedule me for a hair appointment and five other people at the same time.

Whew! I have to think of more.