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hey- ok so i'm studying abroad in london right now- i came over with three friends sand have made a lot of other american friends and British friends... and i consider myself a pretty friendly person... but i have found british people to be incredibly rude... not everyone of course- but on the whole i would defiantely say that they are the most rude people i've ever come across... americans may be obnoxious... but at least we are courteous.... has anyone else ever noticed this?
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<------ Please notice my "location" - I lived in the UK for a good, long time.
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Firstly, congrats on making the decision to do something new and exciting!
Having been there a long time myself, I have to say that I do not agree that the British are a rude people. They're actually rather polite. They believe in being patient, waiting their turn and so on.
You mentioned in a later post that some professor made rude comments about the US.
That's a bummer; I'm really sorry that happened to you and your friends. That must seem so unfair. Please let me assure you that, just because a professor decided to spout his agenda, that does not mean that all Brits are rude.
I'm not sure what your other situation(s) are (as described above). I mean, people are "rude" in big cities everywhere. It also depends on *exactly* what you're describing? Bus drivers? Yes, rude. Taxi drivers? Yeah, maybe.
I have a few things to say:
1) It has been pointed out by RACooper that the British are pretty upset about "being lied to" regarding the reasons for going to war. This is true. I was still living there during the war and I know that the British public and media were irritated that the Prime Minister was not forthcoming. Now that the WMDs *still* have not been found, people are mad. That could very well carry over to an irritation with Americans as well since "we" were the ones who came up with the bomb Iraq idea. Though, they're not very happy with their Prime Minister either both for the war issue but for other dumb things too. (Boo! Down with top-up fees for university students!)
2) British people are reserved. They don't whoop and yell like we do unless they're watching a big sporting match.
They generally don't strike up random conversations with people like we do. That may come across as rudeness, but really it's not. They'll eventually warm up to you, especially if they get an opportunity to speak with you for a while. Also, Brits tend to be more relaxed and friendly in pubs....
3) Customer service in British restaurants is crappy. Downright. They take foreeevvvveerrr to take an order and foreeevvvvverrrrrrr to bring the meal and forrreeevvveerrrrr and a daaaaaaay to bring the check. That's just their way. While we like to rush, rush, rush through our meals (we think faster = better), they think it's rude to give a customer the bill when they've just barely eaten their last bite. A tourist might think their waitress is rude because of this...but really, it's like that everywhere.
This also kind of goes along with service in stores in general. Employees can be slow and they don't fawn all over you like they do in the US. I actually prefer the hands-off approach. I dislike having little 16 year olds stalking me around the clothing racks trying to "help" me or "start my dressing room" etc. So, like, asking a sales clerk for help and getting ignored is not rude...it's typical business practice.
4) The British don't like to take themselves too seriously. They'll make "jokes" of themselves and you. Even after nearly ten years of interacting with British people, I *still* have a hard time with that concept. My wonderful boyfriend of 6.5 years is a dashing Englishman. Even after all these years, he will poke fun at me and I'll get offended even though I knew he was trying to be funny. That type of humour and delivery is hard-wired into my brain as "rudeness" because I grew up in a different culture where poking fun at others is considered mean.
Case in point, I used to work at a takeaway/bakery in Bath (England). We had a regular customer, Clive (what a stereotype name!!!), who was a cab driver. He stopped in several times a day for tea or sausage rolls. He would stand around and drink his tea and talk to us before heading back to the cab. During that time, he noticed my American flair for customer service: "Hi! Can I help you?" or "Welcome to Slices, what can I get for you?" and "Thank you, please come back again!" Clive thought that was cute/funny/amusing. Soooo, *every stinkin' time* he came in, which was like 4-5 times a day, he would walk in and say "Hi!" in a mocking way. I'd be trying to help customers and he'd be standing by the counter saying "Hi!........hi!.........hi!......hi!" in his mocking tone.
I understand that he was just trying to be funny, but I perceived it to mean that he was making fun of me in front of everyone. He thought it was funny. I thought it was rude. Having lived there for a long time, I now realize that, when a Brit does that, it's almost their way of saying that they accept you as a part of the group.
5) I'm going to say it....American students can be pretty obnoxious. I've travelled all around to places like Scotland, Wales, Belgium, Germany, Poland and so on...and no one's been rude to me. *However* that's because I didn't act like an American yokel who thinks the world revolves around me. I've met loads of foreigners who loathe that type of ignorant American.
I knew lots of American students who were doing the London study abroad semester and they were rather pathetic when it comes to relating to their host country and it's citizens. They were loud, obnoxious and totally clueless. They insisted on going together as a big flock of Americans to everything and making it all one big party. It's like they weren't making an honest attempt to really connect with their environment on a sincere level. It's that insincerity which probably makes the locals wonder why the students decided to study abroad in the first instance.
I'm not saying that you're like this - I don't know you at all! It's just that *I* have been irritated by American students in London....and I'm an American!!!
If you really, really feel that people are rude, could you give me specific examples? There are some of us here who have been there, lived there, etc and maybe we can reassure you somehow.
For an example, I'm going to throw being politically correct out the window for a moment. London has several pockets of Middle Eastern communities. In the Kensington area around Bayswater and Queensway, there are several newsagents which appear to be owned or run by Middle Eastern men. No matter what time of day I ever went in to one of those newsagents, I always felt uncomfortable. No, not because I thought they might be terrorists! Rather, the employees would just give me blank stares. No greetings, nothing. If I needed to ask for something, they would just hand it to me and say "50p". They didn't really seem to talk to anyone except other Middle Eastern men. It seems rude, but I suppose that's just their culture.
Please believe me when I say that British people are not rude.
They are helpful and kind. You might have just gotten a bad lot or have misinterpreted a cultural difference. Or maybe you're just a little homesick and this is your way of justifying why being home would be better?
Maybe you can find a local pub to visit at lunchtime (by yourself without a half-dozen American students!) on a fairly regular basis just to get to know some of the regulars or something. Ask the guy nearest the TV to explain rugby or something and go from there.
The people there are really cool and I do hope you'll be able to discover that for yourself before it's time to go home!
Please, please, please feel free to PM me if you have any questions or need some advice or something. I am a huge advocate of study abroad opportunities and I am more than happy to help you out regarding culture, travel, food, whatever! (Especially if you have any "dumb questions" you don't want to ask on the board).
Okie dokie? Do go check out a football (soccer) match, do visit places outside of London, do eat Indian food, do read the local newspapers (or watch the news), do eat a doner kebab, do enjoy the sights and do go have fun!!!
.....Kelly
Edited for clarity and typos!
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