Ohh God...Where Do I Even Start?!

[adpiucf]

I've seen it in the movies-- each member has one white ball and one black ball. As new members names come up for voting, each member slips a ball into the box as it goes around the room. White is pro, Back is con. If there's a black ball, the pledge's membership is terminated.

I'm sure everyone does it differently-- ie: number of black balls needed to depledge, etc.

[AChiOhSnap]

Allow me to consult my scholarly sources...

Taken literally, blackballing is where you can either put a white marble (or no marble) in a box as a "yes" vote for a member of an org. to get in/initiate. If one person drops a black marble in the box, that person is considered "blackballed" and is not allowed membership/initiation. It's an anonymous voting procedure.

And let me just say, I hope that Sweet Valley High #4 -- "Power Play" stands up not only as the seminal work of literature for our generation, but as the main reference for anything and everything sorority related.

[Glitter650]

Speaking for my org only.... There may not be a way to "black ball" but if a new member is doing things that are totally against standards, new members are held to teh same standards as initiated sisters, so if they are doing somethin against our policies or regulations, they are called to standards board, and go through our judicial process.

[honeychile]

Originally Posted by jessXIca

i've heard this before with blackballing referring to a box of some kind, what does that mean? i know what blackballing is but how is a box used?

I actually saw the box when we ceremoniously burned it (after cleaning out a lot of really old things from our storage compartment)! The box was rectangular, and hinged in the middle, like a picnic basket. When you opened both sides, you saw a little divider between the two sides, with a hole in it.

In the one side would be all of the white balls and all of the black balls (there was never just one, only because if it was gone before someone wanted to use it, they'd already know the outcome). When it came time to vote, a sister would open up the side with the marbles, and put either a white or a black ball through the hole in the divider. No one else could see how someone voted.

Whoever would be tabulating the votes only needed to count the black balls, since they stuck out from the white balls.

When I was in school, if there was a vote not to initiate a New Member, there had to be a sort of hearing with the Advisors as to why. It was never a whimsical choice, it was something of a much more serious matter.

[kristi_ann81]

I'm not sure this is true of all chapters in my organization, but I do remember something that happened when I was a pledge. We had a pledge in my pledge class who not only showed her true colors after getting her bid, but was someone whom every pledge and sister had major problems with. Words cannot even describe this girl and the things she did that reflected poorly on our organization!
Anyhow, I think I remember someone saying that if you get called before Chapter Relations 3 times during your pledge period you are dismissed from the chapter and not initiated. I remember older sisters crying at this girls initiation because she only got sent to CR twice and was able to initiate.
Thankfully the girl left after freshman year!

[lcalbdpzax]

Why do you have a rule you're not allowed on the second floor? That's where my room is!

Originally Posted by lcalbdpzax

Why do you have a rule you're not allowed on the second floor? That's where my room is!

Yay 3 year old bump.

Most sororities frown upon their members doing the walk of shame in the morning.

[macallan25]

And most fraternity members adore it.

[honeychile]

I'm not completely up on the rules of 2006, but I know we definitely depledged women (or urged them to depledge) who would NOT fit in with our sisterhood. Just off the top of my head, I can think of three.

When I was in school, a PNM didn't just have to be voted on to become a New Member, but also to be initiated, too. Is that the same?

[Tom Earp]

Remember, these/this person was offered a bid, not a guarentee that they will be Sisters.

If there is a problem with an individual, then get rid of her asap.

If not, you will have more problems than you want.

This is a bigger organization than just a new person, they do not control the whole.

[Peaches-n-Cream]

If a new member is going to be destructive to a chapter, I think that it is a valid reason to depledge them. If someone is so troublesome, I suggest you contact your advisor and Headquarters immediately.

Back to the topic at hand, I am not sure of how this new member was rude to one of your initiated sisters. If she asked about not going to the second floor of a fraternity house, I think it is a legitimate question and an opportunity for the chapter to open a dialogue as ilovemyglo illustrated. If there is something more serious about her conduct, discuss it with the NM educator/trainer and her big sister. Good luck!

[angelic1]

I am not sure of the exact procedures of things.. but I know of an incidence...

we had a new member who was not working out and instead of de-pledging her we told her that we did not feel like at this time so she could be initiated (not sure of the exact wording). SHe was told that she could continue as a new member and go through the new member process with the next class. She ended up deciding it wasnt for her after conversations i believe...


I feel that the week process is not long enough to see someone's true colors. I feel that if you find out that the girl will only cause problems in the future she should not be iniated. I think go through with it will only cause more problems. Each member has a responsibilty to live up to the standards of the sorority and I dont feel like it is to much to ask for..


just my opinion

[ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl]

Ask one of your officers. At least have her big talk to her and tell her what is and isn't acceptable and explain to her WHY it's important to uphold y'all's standards. My mom is a different sorority than me but she always told me that one pledge class can change a whole chapter, because it only takes a few members to ruin a chapter's reputation. And an "old girl" in my chapter reminded me that people at a party don't say, "I saw Susie Q. drunk and hooking up with this guy at the party." They'll say, "I saw that Alpha Gam being a slut at the party." Remind her that her sorority is a part of who she is on campus, and they are a part of her. If she doesn't like having someone in authority over her and doesn't want to be held accountable for her actions, tell her that maybe sorority life isn't for her.

[lbk_kpd]

It has been my general experience on my campus and in my own organization that a bid is not necessarily a guarantee of initiation. I know that my organization, as well as others at my school, go through intense deliberation before extending bids, as well as before determining which new members will become sisters. Of course, I don't think any organization would take the decision to drop a new member lightly; while a bid isn't a guarantee of membership, it is still something significant. When new members have been dropped on my campus, it is usually for something pretty major, be it some kind of drama, inappropriate behavior, inadequate application to the new member process, or general discord between the new member and the active sisters. I think that if once a new member begins her process and it is revealed that she is not right for that chapter, for whatever reason, it becomes a significant problem. Much better to identify and combat the problem ahead of time, instead of initiating this member and having to deal with these issues permanently.

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by ΑΓΔSquirrelGirl

I'm not even sure if we can terminate a new member without her intiating it, but they are held to the same standards that we are.

We can, there is a process, just as for initiated members. It's important that the process involves educating a new member as to our standards, policies and procedures. Is it fair to get rid of someone for doing something that nobody told them was inappropriate? And that's all that really needs to be said on a public internet message board