Girls and Guys Last Names - Page 2

ToBeSororityGrl · #1 08-18-2003, 07:43 PM

My last name gets so confused when trying to have someone spell it, pronounce it, and so forth. My future guy's last name is shorter and easier to spell and pronounce and sounds just as well as my current last name, so I will take his proudly!

HotDamnImAPhiMu · #2 08-18-2003, 08:35 PM

I'm kind of torn. I love my last name, and it's a big part of how I identify and see myself.

At the same time, I have no middle name. My parents couldn't decide on what went with Jacquelyn, and my mom assumed I'd take my husband's last name when I married, so why add a middle name I'd just throw away?

I remember her saying when I was younger that a family should all have one name; after all, they're all one family. I'd have to say I agree with that -- but actually putting that into practice might be harder!

Plus, I have a track record of dating guys with AWFUL last names.

kappaloo · #3 08-18-2003, 08:38 PM

I'm okay with women keeping their own last name.... Changing names is a really big hassle... hyphenating is a lot less paperwork - at least in Canada. (or so my mother tells me)

I don't know what I'll do. My name is very Italian, and my boyfriends is very Czech. It's sounds ... well... different when hyphenated. If I do hyphenate, my children will take my husbands last name, and not a hyphenated name.

I think he should take _my_ name though - it's easier to pronounce! :P

But the best option I think is to merge.

sigtau305 · #4 08-18-2003, 09:06 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by White_Chocolate
what do you think of women keeping their last names?
what do you think of men taking the woman's last name?
what do you think of hyphenating names?

1.) I don't have a problem with that.

2.) That's a interesting question. I don't know of any men who does that type of thing.

3.) see no. 1

aephi alum · #5 08-18-2003, 10:39 PM

When I got married, I took my husband's name as my last name - but legally I have two middle names, the middle name my parents gave me and my maiden name. When I can only give one middle initial (as on my driver's license) I use the middle name my parents gave me.

Hyphenating was not an option as my husband's last name closely resembles alphabet soup.

My degrees are in my maiden name, but I've used my married name for most of my career, so no problem there. IMO, people who have well-established careers under a particular name should keep that name, at least professionally.

AlphaGamDiva · #6 08-18-2003, 11:03 PM

ok, my opinion has changed many times on this subject b/c i was always "that girl" when i was in 2nd grade always writing my name with my lil b/f's last name.....ya know.....bein girlie. then i went through a semi-feminist stage where i was like, "i like my name.....it's MY name.....it sounds famous....i'm keepin it"....but then one of my sorority sisters said something about it (b/c she was then almost engaged) that kinda softened me up and made me all girlie again. she said she thought of it as an honor that her husband wanted to give her his last name.

i didn't word that right b/c it kinda sounds like a domination/ego thing, lol, but ya know what i mean...i hope. take it as a gift or an honor or anything else anti-woman power....but in a good way.

oh, and to answer the question.....i think i'll use my last name with his. can i just ramble on any more....?

valkyrie · #7 08-18-2003, 11:10 PM

As for children, if I were to have any, I'd try to do something equitable like give a girl my last name or a boy his last name. However, I do not wish to have children, so I hope I never have to worry about it!

tunatartare · #8 08-18-2003, 11:18 PM

I have a really long and unusual last name (it's 13 letters long). My family is really conservative and traditional and so they want me to take on the last name of the guy I will marry but my thing is that I'm an only child and my dad has a half-brother but they have different fathers, so if I take on the guy's name, then there will be no one to carry on my last name. On the other hand, if I decide to hyphenate my name, it will seriously be like 20 letters long which might scar our children for life. LOL. Oh well, at least I don't have to think about this for a while.

White_Chocolate · #9 08-19-2003, 09:16 AM

Quote:

Originally posted by sigmagrrl
I'm keeping my name....two reasons:

1) I LOVE my name. It is beautiful and exotic....

2) Now that my dad has passed away, it is my only link to my mother...

I've decided to keep it. For the children, they'll take his name, of course.

your mother's maiden name is different from her married name and your last name

the only reason i would keep my last name was because i thought that there wasn't going to be any guys to pass it on. . .but i have twin nephews from one brother and a nephew from another(with the possibility of twins on the way). . .

Dove Gal · #10 08-19-2003, 10:21 AM

Call me very traditonal but I would take my husband's last name.

The major reason why I would take my husndand's last name is b/c my dad has 2 daughters and his brother, sister, and mom are not close to my grandfather's side of the family (my grandfather died when I was 3). I'll just be really frank about it, when ever they have family reunions do any of us get invited, Hell no. We share the same blood as well as a last name. I am very uoset of how they treated us and I don't want to carry that name on with me. I don't feel that I am totally forgetting about that side of the family but it just represents negativity.

I am also a fan of hyphenated names too, but my last name hyphenated would not sound good with most last names.

I don't know what to think about guys taking th girls last name. I need to think about that some more.

sigmagrrl · #11 08-19-2003, 12:03 PM

I have a sorority sister who got married and her and her husband made up a new last name....VERY progressive!

I think the reason the issue of keeping/taking last names has become more of an issue is because people are getting married at older ages than in the past when it was more traditional to "become part of his family"....

I don't know exactly WHEN I'll get married, but I know I'll be over 30 and I have my own life and personality that I will have forged before meeting him. I may be marrying him, but he's marrying me also....

Taking his name is too antiquated to me...personally...

Optimist Prime · #12 08-19-2003, 01:42 PM

I would want my wife to take my name but only in addition to hers. Like Hyphenated or simply have an additoionall name. That way professionally she can keep hers, and not have to worry about comprimising her carreer. I like carreer oriented women. They're driven. Plus, I'm atracted to power.

Jill1228 · #13 08-19-2003, 02:09 PM

I did not hyphenate...Averett-Flewitt? Too many damn T's.

I took his last name and totally dropped my maiden name, so I am Jill-my middlename-his last name.

He woulda been cool if I had kept my maiden name. But due to a now permanent parental estrangement, I totally dumped my maiden name.

Rio_Kohitsuji · #14 08-19-2003, 05:34 PM

I plan to keep my last name in more professional situations or to just hyphenate it. However TKE209 is -very-traditional in this sense and he would like me to take on his last name. But damn, aren't there -enough- "Myers" in the world??

(soon-to-be-one-day) Mrs. Brownell-Myers

Peaches-n-Cream · #15 08-19-2003, 05:39 PM

I like my name. My boyfriend and I have Irish last names that begin with O'. If we married and I hyphenated, I would be Irish first name O'MyIrish-O'HisIrish. My friend suggested that I just change my last name to O. That would be cool. Since I have absolutely no plans to get married, this is completely hypothetical.