What makes someone "worthy" of your letters?

[justamom]

All of the following is IMHO-

But, the point IS, if we all followed our Creed, we WOULDN'T have to worry about these problems. This is a living evolving condition that seems to be gaining strength. It's because some chapters, in their quest to become a "top" house, start looking at the wrong "qualities" of an individual. To put it bluntly, they buy into the wrappings of the package without knowing what's inside. It's like playing "grab bag". Recruitment, being so short, fast and furious, tends to result in GLOs grabbing the flashier box.

When the chapters start placing more emphasis on looks, OTHER chapters have to as well. I'm not saying that appearances aren't important-like it or not they are-but it has evolved to the point where within the cut sessions phrases like, "She was sooo popular in HS" (Did anyone think to ask WHY???) or "Do you know who her parents are?" becomes THE focus. Once you have this shift occur, it is almost impossible to return to the basic values the sorority was founded on. Like attracts like. So, if your chapter starts pledging girls who are only looking to get married-hooked up-party-or a 4 year vacation on Daddy's checkbook it COULD become the norm for your chapter. How can you turn THAT around? Go back to your creed. Set your standards and stick to them. You will run the risk of losing that
"pretigious" position of the "hottest" girls on campus. Then again, I am a great believer in good virtue. Maybe more than anything, it boils down to the image of the PNMs as to what THEY think is acceptable behavior. I really think a chapter needs to be very careful in who they pledge, return to their Creed raise THAT bar. BUT, unless EVERYONE did it at the same time, I doubt it would work.

Maybe COB WILL be the way to go in the future. (I would credit this thought, but I can't remember who said it.)

A final thought-IMO...it all boils down to SEX, SEX, SEX! Sex sells!

[texas*princess]

When I first read the original post that started this thread, all I could think was ""

Justamom noted [on the first page of this thread] that if she could hand-pick who could wear her letters based on their symphony alone, they might lose some members... reasonably speaking, I think every GLO whether it be NPC, IFC, NPHC, multi-cultural, locals or whatever, the situation would probably be the same... not everyone lives up to their creeds/symphonies like our founders had hoped.

Justamom was also hit it right on the nail when she said that with the short rush process that GLO's tend to "result in GLO's grabbing the flashier box". I think her explanation about that made perfect sense too.

Me personally, I feel the same as sugar and spice who said I'd rather have a sister who was there for me and the chapter than someone who has awesome grades, looks like Barbie, and has a dad who owns a company and an island off the coast, that doesn't do anything.

Alpha Delta Pi's open motto is "We Live For Each Other", and like part of our Creed says:

"I BELIEVE that our motto “We Live For Each Other,” expresses the true spirit of fraternity; and that by living this motto my life will be enriched by true friendships and by unselfish service to mankind. "

[33girl]

Originally posted by justamom
Recruitment, being so short, fast and furious, tends to result in GLOs grabbing the flashier box.

I thought FuzzieAlum said in the other thread that it didn't matter if we had a pubic trim. Sorry, I couldn't resist.

[CutiePie2000]

Originally posted by 33girl
it didn't matter if we had a pubic trim. Sorry, I couldn't resist.

OMG, this is getting OFF THE HOOK! LOL

[AGDPrincess70]

Originally posted by 33girl
I thought FuzzieAlum said in the other thread that it didn't matter if we had a pubic trim. Sorry, I couldn't resist.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!

That's the funniest thing I've heard all day.

I just got in trouble at work for laughing too loud.

haha...flashy box

[carnation]

DZHBrown and MoxieGirl, you have said it for me! For my sorority, I want women who can live our symphony...I don't want women who embarrass us in public or divide us in private.

Now some sororities, especially since formal rush is so fast and furious might aim for the women who look great or come from rich families or were the most popular in high school. These might well be the women who embarrass us in public or divide us in private! Sororities need to aim for those who fit our creeds--who are stellar in character and who will be true friends.

[AggieDZ]

Originally posted by carnation
DZHBrown and MoxieGirl, you have said it for me! For my sorority, I want women who can live our symphony...I don't want women who embarrass us in public or divide us in private.

I'm fairly certain that we've all agreed that we want women who live lives based on and striving for the ideals and values of our particular organizations. Hooray for agreement! I don't think anyone has said that they *want* those who would harm us, or our organization. I just hope that we also remember to focus on living our ideals and values OURSELVES.

Something we always used as a 'reminder' to the actives during Recruitment (and this goes especially/specifically for Seniors) was that each woman should aim to recruit someone to 'take her place'. For me, I wouldn't (and didn't) want someone who just "fit" my Creed (or MY idea of it)---- I chose women who WERE the Creed.

Our president tells me that we really look for girls with potential to bring them out of their shell and help them grow or girls who are really energetic and have a lot of spunk.

On top of it all, FGP allows members to wear their letters only after they've become active which I think is very special. You literally earn your letters. Another special thing about it is your Big gives you your first set of letters. It's a very emotional time because it's right after new members cross over.

[enlightenment06]

To be a part of my organization, you should be a leader. You should be involved in campus activities, or volunteering or both. In addition, you should have a passionate interest in the issues affecting the Black community worldwide. You also have to have a 2.5 GPA by national standards.

A man should first be a man and reflect the proper qualities of manhood before trying to join my organization. In my humble opinion.

[angelic1]

I believe what carnation is talking about goes along with pi beta phi's new leading with values program.

This is a new four part member development program that pi phi has created. The program this year was "living our values".. it gave us a chance to talk about the values of our Fraternity, chapter, and our own to make sure that we were all striving for the same ideals. We also talked about what your membership in Pi Beta Phi means .. like what is expected of you as member.

It talked about basically how you should expect members to live for the ideals of pi beta phi, and how your actions no longer just reflect on yourself but your chapter, pi beta phi, and other greeks.

To make a long story short.. I hope that this is making sense in that this program reaffirmed my belief that a person should live up to values of your organization, fufill your membership obligation, and likewise.. memberships shouldnt be handed out and its not too much to ask either.

Anyone else in Pi Phi.. If I get this wrong in some way correct me.. but I believe that this program was trying to get at.

[Glitter650]

I completely understand about wanting sisters that are there for you and don't just look good on paper... HOWEVER.. there is the reverse of that... sisters that are GREAT friends.. but aren't that good to the chapter as a whole. This is the sister that is soo great and fun to hang out with... but doesn't pay her dues.. will take your 3 am phone call when you need to talk... but didn't send in that report to national on time. This causes problems as well....
I really don't know what the answer is because you definitely want the best of both worlds when looking for members... HOWEVER you can't tell if that woman who looks great on paper (pays her dues.. 4.0, is president of this activity and that AND feeds the homeless in her "spare time" etc...) and seems friendly and sweet when you talk to her for a total of 4 hours (maybe) by the end of rush week is REALLY going to be there for you...
You also can't tell if that girl you really connect with that is SUPER nice and loyal and just gives a really friendly vibe is going to flake out on the more "businessy" responsibilities of belonging to the chapter.

[XOMichelle]

Hmm... all very interesting. I guess all of this depends on what you see as an exemplarly person. Granted, we have creeds and ideals, morals and standards, but I venture to say that we could only do all that our creeds require on the best of days.
What is important to me in my sisters and friends (because in reality this has a greater impact on us personally than the GLO's we are in), is that they have the best of intent and try to the best of their ability to follow it. Yeah, people make mistakes. By the time you've hit 20 everyone has done something stupid that they'd rather not tell you. I know I have. Does that make me a bad member? I dont' think so. The important thing is to learn and grow, and I hope that is the ultimate goal of our sisters and brothers.
Rush is a crazy process, and you don't always end up with people that turn out right. However, I believe that there is a very wide range of people that will benefit from and enjoy fraternity membership, depite mistakes they have made, or things they have not considered.

[smiley21]

Originally posted by 33girl
I thought FuzzieAlum said in the other thread that it didn't matter if we had a pubic trim. Sorry, I couldn't resist.

LOL. i screamed when i read this

[Betarulz!]

There are two things to that come to my mind when asking what makes someone worthy of my letters. What it means to be a Beta, and what it means to be a member of Alpha Tau in Beta Theta Pi. This is the same for every chapter, and it is 100% that you woulnd't fit in at the majority of your organizations chapters, but your chapter is your home and so it's fair to have chapter requirements.

For Beta Theta Pi's General Fraternity requirements I would say that Loyalty is the premium virtue of a member. "Unfaltering Fidelity" is a pharse on the back of our membership cards. I would also stress academic success, ambition, and dedication to the 3 Great Principles and the Objects of Beta Theta Pi. Finally, I think this quote sums it up nicely as to the sentiment of a Beta about his fraternity:"Again, the Beta is distinguishable and distinguished from all other kinds of fraternity men whatsoever by just a little warmer and just a little stronger, just a little tenderer and more enduring fraternity feeling than any of them can attain to. For it was always so. I do not in the least know how it happened, nor why it persisted after it happened, but a long time ago there came into Beta Theta Pi a fraternity spirit that was, and is, and apparently will continue to be, unique. We know it, who are inside, and they see and record it who are outside the Beta pale. Whether young or old, in college or out, from the small school or the great university, we are conscious of a heritage of genuine fraternalism that has not been vouch safed in like measure -- I say it deliberately -- to any other of the great college fraternities. And we cannot doubt that in this, as in other respects, our 'future will copy fair our past, and that in the world of fifty years from now, as in that of years ago,

. . . as in that that lies around us today —
the first mark of a Beta will be his Beta Spirit."
— Willis O. Robb, Ohio Wesleyan 1879

As for Alpha Tau: One of the things we stress in rush is that "once a Beta, Always a Beta, Everywhere a Beta." And we look at it like this, that the guys we sign, have always been Beta's in their actions adn goals, just never called Betas by name. In other words we look to find untapped Betas and refine them into productive members, not take guys and make them Betas. For our chapter that means leadership, involvement, being social, but having your priorities set. We look for the guys who (if they party) can work their asses off Sunday night through Wednesday night, and then Thursday, Friday and Saturday, can let loose and have a good time. Do I think that it takes more to be an Alpha Tau, than just a Beta? Yeah, but for a Beta cahpter that throws the best parties on a campus, I probably wouldn't be a good fit, and so you might say that for them it takes more to be a XY than a normal Beta.

[DZHBrown]

"once a Beta, Always a Beta, Everywhere a Beta."

Betarulz - I think that is an awesome saying/motto/whatever. I especially like the "everywhere a Beta" part....
Thanks for sharing!