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  #16  
Old 06-24-2003, 11:06 AM
LawyerGal2003 LawyerGal2003 is offline
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It does happen

First CONGRATS!!!

And yes 'our kind of people' do it too. My friend had an elegant wedding horse and carriage and everything over 100 people and the week of people were still RSVPing and she sent the invites. 3-4 months in advance! I was the Maid of Honor and I made calls to double check on some folks since I was calling about the gifts from the bridal party (there were 20 of us) and the events for the night before.. so that's an idea!

Last edited by LawyerGal2003; 06-24-2003 at 12:04 PM.
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  #17  
Old 06-24-2003, 01:01 PM
darling1 darling1 is offline
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OKAY.....

Having planned my own wedding, I can tell you that our people can be downright TRIFLING.

I had family that RSVP'd and up until the day before said they were coming, only to not show up, not send a card/gift and give a BOGUS excuse.

If you set a reasonable deadline and folks have not responded, you MUST MOVE ON. If you treat folks like a $$$ sign, it will make your life a lot easier. You or someone you designate can call if you feel comfortable and do one last check. Most reception places give up until a few days before the wedding to make adjustments to the list. But set a deadline for this, perhaps making it June 30 and the go with that number.

In my instance it was a class issue. Most of my more 'cultured' family and friends responded in a timely fashion and sent a gift and/or card before the wedding. Ultimately I just thing that people are going to be people, but let them act out on their dime, not yours.

GOOD LUCK AND WELCOME TO MARRIAGE!!!!
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  #18  
Old 06-24-2003, 05:21 PM
AKA_Monet AKA_Monet is offline
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Post

Fortunately for me, my husband and I did a Civil Ceremony in May 16, 2003.

Now we will be having a Religious Ceremony in Sedona, Arizona on July 2, 2003. Yes, during the week right before July 4th in the heat...

My mom and I rapidly sent out invitations to very close friends and family. Interestingly my family with whom I am the closest flaked out on me and said they will be sending me money... My mom just told HER friends and they gonna crash are the wedding. My husband is not close with his extended family so RSVP-ing for him was not an issue.

I think it was 'cuz Sedona is an out of way place--kinna like a "destination wedding" and only true to real folks would show up and that way, they RSVP... Email and phone is working for us... And both of us sent invites to at least 50 people. And we're at 40 something. The dinner we are having asked to give the final count in 2-3 days--I dunno--my mom's in charge of dat...

If my mom decides to have a Reception in my hometown, where we know there could easily be 200+ people, I told my mom to just do heavy hors d'ouvres with ice sculptures--a true Reception--not a sit down dinner. In fact the hotel in Sedona is charging us $3.00 per slice to cut our wedding cake!!! So that gets expensive for negroes to NOT RSVP for a skerious sit down dinner type reception!!! Besides, since I'm almost 35, I don't need all the fancy-smancy formal stuh that y'all youngins need... Sometimes too many of my friends have had one too many chicken dinners if you know what I mean...

What you could do is set up your seating arrangements for your guest who have RSVP'ed. Set aside your "family" area tables. Usually, the hotel cooks 10% more plates based on your final count... Make like 2-4% of those plates vegetarian on the safe side... And do not count on the hotel not charging you for extras if you need them--set up a contengency and several back up plans.

You need to have your girlfriends that are helping with the guest book be in charge of seating for non-family related guests... You need at least 4 friends to do that. Usually a cool cousin will help you or an auntie that will be ready to work...

Sometimes, your registry lists folks who have purchased items from your list... Even if they give you a number of items purchased, it can give you an idea of how many folks will be coming. And maybe deduct at least 2-3% of that from that number based on the cost of the reception dinner per item purchased.

Lastly, take a breath, get a massage and remember the real reason you are doing all of this--for you and your future husband!!!

Congratulations!!!
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"Yo soy una mujer negra" ~Zoe Saldana

Last edited by AKA_Monet; 06-24-2003 at 05:25 PM.
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  #19  
Old 06-25-2003, 03:16 AM
Wonderful1908 Wonderful1908 is offline
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Red face

Thanks for all your responses. I have yet to be truly stressed but when ytou are talking bout my $$$ things change. First I am gonna email all my linesister who recieved an invite and tell them the deal. Secondly we mailed 125 invites, I am thinking that we should get somewhere between 80-130 people, the number is so broad. I have 14 people in the wedding party. I am trying to see if I should pay for 125 or 100, my mother syas 100 and if there is more clear that up with the reception hall. My best friend got married last year and the caterer told them to drop 40 people from their number for those who don't show and those you lose from the church to the reception hall. We are having an open bar so 25 people makes a nice little difference what do you all think?
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  #20  
Old 06-26-2003, 01:59 PM
LawyerGal2003 LawyerGal2003 is offline
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I agree w/ your Mom go for 100. Most of the time the Hall will be willing to up the number even a week in advance for you...They usually get testy when they have to add tables but even then thats more $$$$ for them so they will make a way!

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  #21  
Old 07-15-2003, 06:30 PM
AKA2D '91 AKA2D '91 is offline
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Hopefully, everything turned out well for Soror Wonderful and her family.

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  #22  
Old 07-16-2003, 12:21 AM
Sugar_N_Spice Sugar_N_Spice is offline
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Congrats to Wonderful1908 on your wedding!!!!
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  #23  
Old 07-16-2003, 12:44 AM
ModelSF ModelSF is offline
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Congratulations!!!!
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  #24  
Old 07-16-2003, 11:54 AM
AKA_Monet AKA_Monet is offline
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Wink Take deep breaths!!!

Breathe!!!

Honeymooning yet?

Congratulations!
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We thank and pledge Alpha Kappa Alpha to remember...
"I'm watching with a new service that translates 'stupid-to-English'" ~ @Shoq of ShoqValue.com 1 of my Tweeple

"Yo soy una mujer negra" ~Zoe Saldana
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  #25  
Old 07-16-2003, 02:50 PM
Ideal08 Ideal08 is offline
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Congratulations, Soror!!! Hope your day was as lovely as you dreamed!
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  #26  
Old 07-16-2003, 03:05 PM
Steeltrap Steeltrap is offline
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Congratulations, Sorors AKA_Monet and Wonderful08.
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  #27  
Old 07-16-2003, 06:55 PM
DetroitBAP DetroitBAP is offline
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Aww....

Congratulations! I can't wait to get married. It's such a beautiful thing
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  #28  
Old 07-16-2003, 07:14 PM
Wonderful1908 Wonderful1908 is offline
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Wink I's Married!

THANKS!!!!! It was WONDERFUL, it was so beautiful and the reception was so much fun! Something about free liquor that gets the party started! I will post pictures, not only am I now married but I just got a brand new computer today so I am back on the scene. I tried to take it all in, it was awesome, I danced, strutted, was sernaded by sorors, ate, .....drank, and drank, and well you get the picture. I can't wait to get he pictures, Thanks for all the congrats!
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  #29  
Old 07-16-2003, 07:24 PM
CountryGurl CountryGurl is offline
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Congratulations and may God bless your union of love.
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  #30  
Old 07-16-2003, 10:32 PM
GRITS GRITS is offline
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congrats!
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