What can a chapter do if you have a girl like the Real World's Trishelle?

[guardian_angel!]

Originally posted by carnation




And your hangup with Chi Omega would be.......????????

None. If she were a Pi Phi, ZTA, or DZ ; I would have treated it the same.

[Noa]

Originally posted by guardian_angel!


I never claimed that they did. Where did that come from?



How do you know she lost her membership? My point was what would a chapter do if they had a girl like her. She may not have been a Chi Omega during the show but that doesn't change the fact she used to be one.

I like how you express your feelings Noa, I think we could be good friends.

I know that you did not say what I wrote. I was simply pointing out that no matter what our organizations stand for, there will be those that do not always uphold those ideals and standards. We should remember that before degrading each other. I know that I have not always upheld the motto of my sorority to its highest standards. Still, I have qualities in me that make me a wonderful XYZ. And although Trishelle (in this case) may come across as a slut (as some have called her), we should remember that
1) Television (especially MTv) can twist things to make them appear a certain way.
2) She and others on the shows have issues like real people.
3) She may still have qualities that made her a wonderful member of this certain organization at one time (even though she is no longer a part of it).

I do raise one question:
When do we draw the line to when we are OURSELVES and not necessarily a representative to our organizations? When we're at our best we always affiliate ourselves, yet when we are at our worst, we aren't a "good representation" and often critisized.
Can we not be representations to ourselves first and to our organizations second? I try to represent my organization to the best at all times. I do not believe I have ever done something so terrible that my organization would frown upon me. Am I lucky for that? Perhaps. However I have had sisters who were simply being themselves and for that, they were disciplined and/or removed from the organization. Does that make them less of a person? I do not think so. Does it mean they weren't worthy of being a member? I do not think so. So if these sisters who were removed act a certain way do you think I sit there shaking my head because they once represented my organization? No. They are free to do what they want with their lives. I cannot dwell on them behaving a certain way just because they used to be my sister.

This ties into your question and statement that it did not change the fact that she used to be one.

I simply think the only reason this is suddenly an issue is because this is on television. Do you think her chapter is getting flack or praise? My guess is both. Is it easy for them? I'm certain it isn't. Still, Trishelle's actions aren't that of this particular organization...and she hasn't publicized her once affiliation. Therefore, why make a big deal about it.

The question should be...If someone in your chapter acted un-XYZ like, how would you deal with them. I appreciate your example, but still, Trishelle is her own person.

[CarolinaCutie]

Wow... that's a really good answer. Definitely food for thought.

[Thrillhouse]

Originally posted by 33girl
. How much is the magic of editing and how much is real, I can't say.

The magic of editing is the only thing that keeps these shows going nowadays.

[Angels&Arrows]

Originally posted by carnation

And your hangup with Chi Omega would be.......????????

ROFLMAO... Carnation, calling a spade a spade!!!! Love my sister!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dzrose93]

Originally posted by guardian_angel!
How do you know she lost her membership? My point was what would a chapter do if they had a girl like her. She may not have been a Chi Omega during the show but that doesn't change the fact she used to be one.

What Greek affiliation she USED to have is neither here nor there. She is not a Chi Omega any longer. She was NOT a Chi Omega when she participated in the show. So what does her conduct on the show have to do with Chi Omega? The answer is a big, fat NOTHING.

If someone is not abiding by the standards that a Greek organization has set, then that person can lose their membership. But what that person does AFTER the membership termination, good or bad, is no reflection on the GLO to which he/she used to belong.

I'm not a member of Chi Omega, and I'm certainly not a member of the chapter where Trishelle was from. Therefore, I'm not going to presume to know what circumstances caused the girl's membership to be terminated. However, I do have a firm faith in NPC organizations, and I know that they don't take membership termination lightly. If a girl's membership is terminated, then you can bet the farm that there is a very good reason behind it. And I don't think that it's really our place on GreekChat to question that reason.

Bottom line: Every GLO handles problems within their chapters in a way that they feel is best for the chapter. If the problem lies with a specific member, then that member may be reprimanded, put on probation, suspended, or completely terminated -- all depending on how severe the problem is. Every case is different and every GLO is different, so it's impossible to make a blanket statement as to how chapters deal with "problem" members.

[2017law]

Did anyone ever answer why she is no longer a member? Is she alum or is she out b/c of the show? Is that something that most GLOs do? Janet from Seatle was a DDD and the chick from Hawaii was a KKG. Were they kicked out as well?
Just something to think about....
Why is she doing what she's doing?
She said she feels as though her father doesn't love her. Ever think she is sleeping around or hooking up a lot to make herself feel love from some man to make up for the love she doesn't get from her dad?
I don't approve of her actions, but before I blame her GLO or ask what they would do, I would think about why she does what she does and see if anyone can help her.
2017

[dzrose93]

Originally posted by 2017law
Did anyone ever answer why she is no longer a member? Is she alum or is she out b/c of the show? Is that something that most GLOs do? Janet from Seatle was a DDD and the chick from Hawaii was a KKG. Were they kicked out as well?
Just something to think about....

As I and others mentioned earlier in the thread, Trishelle is no longer a member of Chi Omega. Her membership was terminated before she did the show, so her actions on the Real World have nothing to do with a GLO.

Only a member of the Chi Omega chapter where Trishelle pledged can answer the question as to why she is no longer a member. However, within the NPC, the termination of someone's membership is a private decision that is usually made between the individual in question and a judiciary committee. I know that my organization has a strict policy about keeping J-board meetings private, and, as a rule, they are not discussed with people who aren't on J-Board. I'm sure that most NPC organizations have practices similar to ours.

I would suggest that we respect the privacy of our fellow sisters in Chi Omega by dropping the Trishelle issue. I'm sure that we have all had "questionable" members in each of our chapters at some point, and I seriously doubt that we would appreciate those people being spotlighted on GreekChat.

Just my .02!

[2017law]

My point had nothing to do with XO and the org. It had to do with why Trishelle does what she does. Instead of ripping her or XO, I was asking people to think about WHY she does what she does.
I have nothing against XO. My concern is not for XO, it's for the girl. She is obviously trying to compensate for her father's lack of affection by getting it from other men.
To any other org dealing with a girl like this, I urge you to get her help.
2017

[dzrose93]

Originally posted by 2017law
My point had nothing to do with XO and the org. It had to do with why Trishelle does what she does. Instead of ripping her or XO, I was asking people to think about WHY she does what she does.
I have nothing against XO. My concern is not for XO, it's for the girl. She is obviously trying to compensate for her father's lack of affection by getting it from other men.
To any other org dealing with a girl like this, I urge you to get her help.
2017

2017, I understand the point you were trying to make, and I do agree that the girl might have some personal issues that need to be handled. However, I was responding to your other comments which are listed below. Sorry for the confusion.

quote:
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by 2017law
Did anyone ever answer why she is no longer a member? Is she alum or is she out b/c of the show? Is that something that most GLOs do? Janet from Seatle was a DDD and the chick from Hawaii was a KKG. Were they kicked out as well?
Just something to think about....
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[AlphaSigLana]

If anyone really wants to know about Trishelle I'm sure if you visit the MTV site there is a way to contact her and find out why she was terminated, why that would be so important is beyond me. I didn't even know that she had been a member of Chi Omega until reading this post.
I personally think Trishelle is a small town girl with low self-esteem who wants guys attentions bc she has problems with her Dad(according to an episode I saw). I really don't see what her sex life has to do with her membership in Chi Omega. Chi Omega is a wonderful org. and has outstanding women.

[White_Chocolate]

when i went through rush, my chapter loved me and embraced me as an individual. i worked my ass off to get respect by doing as many community service hours as i could while maintaining a 40 hr job, 11 hr school schedule(i took snowboarding which was worth 2 hrs), and i was elected to an office my first year in sorority.

however, i had a little problem with making out with every hot guy that said i was cute. let's just say, i was a little hooch. then, i grew up and realized that my sorority sisters were being tagged as 'the girls to hook up with' when we would go to house parties over on u of l campus. and i didn't like that. so, i quit making out with every hot guy and got my ass a boyfriend.

or you say do what my sisters said to me. . .
Calm the f* down!.

[LeslieAGD]

If you have a member with questionable actions, I would suggest sitting him or her down and discussing your concerns. If this does not work, you may want to bring it to the attention of your standards board.

If you want to discuss the actions of Trishelle, in regards to the Real World and NOT her former GLO affiliation, here is an already existing thread in Chit Chat: Real World - Las Vegas

[AXOLiz]

Wow, I may be off base here since I haven't been around as long as many of you...but it seems like the real question was how any chapter would deal with a problem member who was representing the chapter poorly, in this case through public, promiscuous behavior. Trishelle just happened to be the one currently on TV behaving that way AND happened to be greek at one point AND also happened to be a former member of Chi Omega (and obviously not representative of the org. as a whole). Seems like the person asking the question was just asking a question and didn't know it had to be worded in such a way to not get labeled as one of the you-know-who's... Maybe it's just me, but it could've as easily been, "Since y'all work in nuclear power plants, how would you deal with a worker that acts like Homer Simpson?", if this was a nuclear power plant workers' board and all.

Anyhow, I hope I didn't offend anyone. I understand THEY caused a ton of problems before, but I don't see how attacking someone with a question and trying to keep from talking about it if it even seems to be a remote possibility that the poster is one of THEM helps at all. I mean, if we're refusing to answer legitimate questions - even if they're not worded in the most sensitive way - and jumping on new posters who know nothing of what happened before...isn't that the kind of trouble you-know-who would've loved to see happen in the first place?

And to answer the original question as I've interpreted it - I was the VP of standards for my chapter, and that's what our standards board dealt with all the time. If someone wasn't representing the chapter well, one of us would talk to them. Sometimes people didn't know how what they were doing looked, and that was all it took. If the problem continued, we'd call them in and talk to them as a board, if for no other reason than concern for their well-being. You *can* take further action if they are consistently bringing down the chapter image to the point where it's a serious problem, but we never had anything get that bad. No matter what, you always have chapter advisors around as well, so they can help deal with a problem member.

And my guess would be that if someone was behaving in a way that was seriously harmful to the reputation of the chapter as a whole, chances are there's a bigger problem going on. I would hope, in that situation, that the brothers or sisters would help the member get through it.

[chioprincess]

Chi Omega has a wonderful program that we share with all our members about issues such as self esteem, drugs, eating disorders etc. I have seen a lot of girls pass through my organization and through other organizations who need some kind of counseling and reassuring, and I commend Chi Omega for starting a program to help educate us. I would also like to say we focus ALWAYS on the women and we never focus on the guy.... Is the guy she's sleeping with from a fraternity? I mean watever, it has nothing to do with the fact that she has severe emotional problems and needs help.