Weight an issue . . . - Page 2

Lady Pi Phi · #16 08-10-2002, 10:02 PM

Being too thin and bein too fat is not healthy. We all know that. Weight has always been an issue or me. At 11 I was dignosed with Juvenille diabetes. Later I developed bulemia, and then depression. I am still struggling with all three and trying to cope on a day to day basis. Those that suffer from bulemia are usually the right weigh for them or overweight. I am overweight, yes I'll admit that (mostly because you can't see me). I would hate for a "thin" person (I use thin in quotation marks because obviously what I think is thin is quite destorted) to come up to me and say hey you're fat go to a gym, just like I wouldn't go up to some one who seemed to be underweight and say you're too thin, eat soemthing. What we need to do for our brothers and sisters is to be able to recognize the signs and symptoms of an eating disorder or disturbed eating (yes there is that) and be able to act accordingly. None of us are professional doctors, nurses, dieticians or therapists (well there might be some Alum on here that are, and maybe if there are they can come forward and share some information on eating disorders with us). But we can go for help. We can go to a counselor on campus or a doctor on campus and ask for advice. I would not want to see my sisters hurting themselves becuase of what people think a socially acceptable with and image should be. Remember there are people who might seem overweight to you, but be very healthy. Same goes for people we might think are underweight. You can't tell just by looking at them. Those with an eating disord are going to suffer in silence, they will think nothing is wrong with them and won't get help. We have to help them understand that they are hurting themselves, but still remember wwe can't force someone to get help. Makeing sure you are there for your brothers and sisters is the most important thing. They are most likely to come to you when they need help.
we are al beutiful in someway and just because we all can't fit into a size 2 and have bulging muscles doesn't make us any less worthy. We can be fat, thin, short or tall, we all have something to contribute.

Pi Phi Love and Mine,

Emily

nyrdrms · #17 08-10-2002, 10:26 PM

At my school, I can tell you that weight is not at all an issue. All the organizations have sisters that range from XS to XXL. If you are truly concerned by this stereotype, take a look at some of the sisters when you go through recruitment. If you feel as though they portray the image you fear, then perhaps that's not where you belong. Get to know the sisters, they truly are the key as to what your life in their organization would be.

chideltjen · #18 08-11-2002, 01:38 AM

*completely off topic*
Lady Pi Phi, you are a diabetic as well? I read your story. I can only imagine what kind of situation you are in. I commend you for showing your strength. I was diagnosed when i was 13 months.

*ok back on topic*
Don't let the weight issue stress you out. The girls on our campus are all shapes and sizes. The key is finding who you fit in with socially and personality wise.
I think the only weigh ins that greeks do are for playing tug o war for greek week and there is a weight limit.

Lady Pi Phi · #19 08-12-2002, 11:42 PM

chideltjen,

13 months!!! wow, that's young. I know how difficult it was for me when I was 11. I can only imagine how difficult it must have been for you and your family. How are you handling your diabetes...if you don't mind me asking?

PPL,

Emily

chideltjen · #20 08-13-2002, 01:50 AM

lady pi phi.

i pMed you!

James · #21 08-14-2002, 12:49 PM

Reviewing the thread I wonder if people are getting my point.

Again there seems to be a social issue that prevents us talking about weight in a meaningful way.

33girl yes there healthy people that are way overweight. Just as overly thin people are likewise healthy. Healthy means not visibly ill.

Excess thinness affects cholestrol levels, bone density and other things.

But we can't seem to discuss the long term health risks that are associated with being overweight. It tops the list of all most every major category of things-that-will-kill-us-faster.

So again, why is it so hard to have a dialogue about the issue? Isn't that failing our friends?

Lady Pi Phi · #22 08-14-2002, 01:24 PM

I thinkwe are being bad friends if we continue to let the people around us "eat themselves to death".
But James, have you ever tried to talk to a person who seemed to be overweight and you wanted to help? I would venture to assume that the majority of overweight people are depressed about their weight and might very well be overly sensitive. If you were to speak to them about their weight they might take that as you calling them fat. Not to say that they are, but sometimes you can be the most tactful person and things can get blown way out of proportion.
One cannot help someone who doesn't want to be helped. Instead of speaking to them directly you might approch them subtly. If you were to go out dinner with an overweight friend instead of taking them to a bar and grill where most of the food is high in fat, adn saying to them, should you be eating that burger, you should be eating salad, while everyone one around them is eating that burger. Take them to a vegetarian restaurant or a health food restaurant, where the food choices are healthier, and eat healthy with them instead of telling them what they should and shouldn't eat.
When fraternities or sororities have dinners, the house should make sure that there are plenty of healthy choices available, or make sure all the food is healthy.
There is no easy way to let an overweight friend or even underweight friend for that matter, know that you are concerned for their health
I don't know, maybe I just rambled on here. I thinkwe just need to find out how we can be sensitive to our friends that might have eating problems so we can help them instead of making them feel more isolated.

James · #23 08-14-2002, 01:32 PM

Actually, its much easier to bring it up with guys . . . Most guys say they used to be in great shape lol. So its easier to motivate them.

I have never brought it up with a girl except in the context of goals and training.

I got a complaint once when I was talking with a girl over training routines (she was actually quite thin and older) when she was telling me her problem areas and I agreed that i could see them.

But if there is no way to bring up a dialougue about these types of issues people are going to have needless physical problems and mental anguish.

I have no good answer.

I agree with the whole choosing a healthier dinner place, but believe it or not, you will find that most people that are overwieght do not consistantly over eat at all.

In fact they often eat less than their thinner friends. I am not talking about the morbidly overweight of course.

amycat412 · #24 08-14-2002, 02:31 PM

Quote:

Originally posted by James

I got a complaint once when I was talking with a girl over training routines (she was actually quite thin and older) when she was telling me her problem areas and I agreed that i could see them.

Yes, well, we can be quite sensitive. I mean, some people no matter how hard you work your arms/abs/thighs are just NEVER going to have the definition they want--their bodies aren't built for it.

Instead of saying, yeah I can see them, a better approach is-- "DIet and targeted toning could help you feel better." You're saying yeah I can see them without hurting feelings, you're giving her a plan of action.

Quote:

Originally posted by James

In fact they often eat less than their thinner friends. I am not talking about the morbidly overweight of course.

ABSOLUTELY. I routinely eat more than my overweight friends. But... then again, I am active--I work out everyday and have a fast metabolism, am burning more calories, so require more calories.

Amy/on my way to Hawaii momentarily.

#25 08-14-2002, 03:23 PM

Other than the same sort of bashing you'd get anywhere if you showed that your weight bothered you I don't htink there's any weight issues in the greek system.

USFSDTAlum · #26 09-03-2002, 02:26 PM

I know that this is an old topic, but I think its interesting that there is 2 pages of people saying that weight doesn't matter. BUT> we all know that barbie sorority on campus. The one where the biggest girl in it is a 4 and they are all beautiful....Don't pretend like I'm making this up. You have to ask yourself if you can find sisterhood amoung these girls. But, yes, in situations weight can come into play. It makes me happy that everyone who has replied doesn't find it a problem in there chapter though.

James · #27 09-05-2002, 08:20 PM

I see no reason why there can't be a certain "type" that a sorority has. There are plenty of women that will fit any "look". And as long as the Greek system is strong enough than a house that caters to any specific image or interest can be at quota.

On Campus's with weaker Greek systems, there might be a problem.

But honestly a house with a reputation for thin attractive and friendly girls is going to have no problem filling recruitment quotas

I have seen houses with reputations as being heavy, have serious problems filling membership quota.

*shrug* It might be unpalatable but it doesn't make it untrue.

Quote:

Originally posted by USFstudent
I know that this is an old topic, but I think its interesting that there is 2 pages of people saying that weight doesn't matter. BUT> we all know that barbie sorority on campus. The one where the biggest girl in it is a 4 and they are all beautiful....Don't pretend like I'm making this up. You have to ask yourself if you can find sisterhood amoung these girls. But, yes, in situations weight can come into play. It makes me happy that everyone who has replied doesn't find it a problem in there chapter though.

justamom · #28 09-06-2002, 11:30 AM

Weight is a very sensitive subject, but to say it doesn't exist as part of the "selection process" is kind of hard for me to believe.
Health aside, we are bombarded with pictures of what our society deems to be attractive. Being outside those images draws attention and can appear exagerated. I would venture a guess that overweight people catch our attention more frequently than an average, attractive person. Look at a photo. If everyone has blond hair except a few, you notice them. Same thing, if everyone has similar physical characteristics the few who stray from the norm, draw attention.

At LSU, there are the "blond" sororities and the "brunette" sororities. I've joked with a few about how "tiny", as in size 2,
a particulr sorority is...and that is a characteristic of the girls they attract. Stereotypes exit and just saying they don't, won't make them go away. It is sad, but weight plays into it.

Of course in every sorority you will find examples of variance in hair and eye color, level of intelligence, leadership and weight. When one characteristic becomes prevalent, in my opinion, we see stereotypes evolve. I don't know if this would apply to smaller Greek systems where PNMs are short supply.

MoxieGrrl · #29 09-06-2002, 02:45 PM

I definitely agree with some of the comments made here. To think that weight does not affect sorority membership is a complete joke. Take a look at the National websites. How many overweight girls do you see on there? How many girls above a size 10? (I think a size 8 would be stretching it on some.)

Everyday I work with eating disordered women. The ones who are obscenely thin *do not* think they are. The ones who have compulsive eating disorders....yeah, they know they are overweight. They do not need a "friend" to tell them about it. I feel that if they approach you and ask for help, there is no problem. However, if I were in their situation, I would have a huge chip on my shoulder to have a size 6 friend give me weight loss tips, regardless of her intentions.

JAM: To comment on your wondering if smaller Greek systems & stereotypes. My college system was very small....about 80 girls going through recruitment. These girls were their own person before, then they "evolve" into their GLO's stereotype. They will completely change their looks, behavior, etc...to fit in with that house's stereotype.

And their is pressure to do it too. One house is known for the fact that all of their pledges "mysteriously" drop 15 pounds during their pledge period. And they tend to recruit "little" girls anyways. Sounds a little fishy to me....Then I found out (through our advisor, who is friends with this house's advisor) that they put the pledges on a weight loss program. Their reasoning? "We want to make sure that you live up to XYZ ideals."

Nothing fires me up like eating disorder/weight issues... *clicks "submit reply" and goes back to dreaming of Ben & Jerry's*

justamom · #30 09-08-2002, 09:02 AM

Moxiegrrl-And their is pressure to do it too. One house is known for the fact that all of their pledges "mysteriously" drop 15 pounds during their pledge period. And they tend to recruit "little" girls anyways. Sounds a little fishy to me....Then I found out (through our advisor, who is friends with this house's advisor) that they put the pledges on a weight loss program. Their reasoning? "We want to make sure that you live up to XYZ ideals."

I've been thinking about this and I keep coming back to it. On one level, they have a concept with potential, but it's so distorted, it's now something really UGLY!

I think it would be great for nutrition and health topics to have a place in the chapter meetings, maybe even help ward off those Freshman 15. Group physical activities-there are two gyms that a lot of the sisters belong to one focuses on stepping the other aerobics. They are motivated because it's a group thing and it's aiding in their overall health. I know their dinners are prepared with calories in mind compared to the dorm food. Anyone can sign up for the house meal plan. I know my biggest enemy at that age was BEER! It's cheap, it's available and it will add weight faster than peanut butter. (It can also break you out)
Anyway, proper nutrition and exercise are part of a healthy lifestyle (so I just spouted of an ad). Giving the girls the tools and the motivation is one thing. Doing it for that certain "look" is quite another. One works from a position of positive the other is all negative.