But I'm Perfect! (a Recruitment Story Parody)

[angels&angles]

veracious? Did you mean vivacious?

But, fun!

[MU2Driver]

I think she meant voracious.

[carnation]

Well, veracious means truthful and Ole Girl is certainly calling 'em as she sees 'em.

[kateee]

I can't wait to read this ending haha great parody!

[MaryPoppins]

This thread is awesome!

[peppermint23]

So with a heavy heart, I made my way to the Fuglies house. I didn't bother smiling as I walked in or even making eye contact with any of the girls. I didn't want to be there, but what else was I gonna do, homework? And no one was drinking at this hour except for the homeless guys across as the street who sit in front of the Taco Bell.

I got picked up by a girl who wasn't so bad-looking. She sat down with me and started asking me how rush was going so far.

"Really good," I lied. "I got invited back to all the sororities."

She frowned. "All...of them?"

"Yup," I said. "They added an extra 2 hours to my schedule so I could pack in everyone for this round."

She smiled nervously and started scratching her ear and looking over her shoulder. I asked her if she deep-conditioned and let her know she probably needed it because she was getting her dandruff flakes all over my dress.

Then she was bumped by a really tragic-looking girl who had the weirdest overbite. I asked her if she'd ever tried Invisalign and soon after got bumped again.

I was starting to get depressed. Not only had they totally messed up my schedule and lied about it "not being an error" so my parents wouldn't sue, they were sticking me with the HARDEST people to talk to.

It did not go well. Some girl came around with a tray of gigantic cookies and asked me if I wanted one.

"I don't eat bread," I told her, rolling my eyes. "Or bad food coloring."

Then we had to watch the most BORING slideshow which talked about their philanthropy and all the money they raised last year for their charity for dying kids or something. I fell asleep during it and I don't think anyone bothered to wake me up until we had to leave.

I was wondering at that point if sorority life really was for me. All of these girls were so lame and not what I thought they'd be like at all. There was no way I'd take a bid from the Fuglies, even if they held a gun to my head, and the stupid Greek life office was as useless as 3D-glasses on a blind person.

So I knew there was only one thing I'd have to do to make a final impression, and it just might get me a bid...

[peppermint23]

Originally Posted by carnation

Well, veracious means truthful and Ole Girl is certainly calling 'em as she sees 'em.

Yeah I'm pretty sure she said "veracious" because I'm not fake like all the other girls at my school.

[kateee]

I can't wait to read the rest of this.

[ASUADPi]

I LOVE THIS THREAD!!!!!!!

[madoug]

more please, miss

[thetalady]

OK, it has been a week... my toe is starting to tap with impatience! We want an update already

[thetalady]

We aren't going to get an end ot this story, are we?

[chi-o_cat]

Oh, I get it! It's a parody of one of those recruitment stories where the poster starts the story and then goes AWOL after being released from recruitment.

[AGDee]

Originally Posted by chi-o_cat

Oh, I get it! It's a parody of one of those recruitment stories where the poster starts the story and then goes AWOL after being released from recruitment.

Those were my thoughts.

[adpiucf]

Well, you see, where was this THING...

ETA: It's a parody, gals. Someone else step up and finish it!