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12-17-2001, 11:05 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: home of the nation's highest car insurance rates :(
Posts: 307
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there isn't any doubt that i'd take the job and leave the man. i'd be receptive to trying a long distance relationship, but that would only last so long. eventually he'd either come to me or we'd go our separate ways.
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12-18-2001, 12:42 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Mar 2001
Location: Orlando Florida USA
Posts: 151
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c
I would take lots of things into account. How serious is the relationship? Is marriage in the picture? If so, I would think one party would have to make a sacrifce for the other. If the relationship isn't at that stage, I would try the long distance. I've been there and done that- and it sucks- but if it's meant to be it'll find a way.
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12-18-2001, 11:11 AM
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Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: VA by way of TX!
Posts: 336
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I'm gonna jump on the bandwagon and say, "take the job, lose the man."
It's a lot easier said than done though, especially if he's a GOOD man! But, if it's meant to be, you guys will end up together.
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12-20-2001, 03:54 PM
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Location: PA
Posts: 69
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Hello fellow greeks,
I know this one was for the ladies, but I wanted to throw something in.
For all of you who said that you'd "bounce" on the guy, I say GREAT!!!! That is an excellent decision. If you aint married (but you're supposedly serious), and he has not even given you any thought to your relationship and how it might be impacted by your leaving, then the heck with him.
If it's meant to be, it will be!!!!! If the situation were reversed for me, I'd do the same thing as you woman would do. After all most of us work at jobs where we hope to advance someday. We don't want to be stuck in the same position for all of our lives. Right!!!! A man (or woman) is definitely not a reason to pass on a good career opportunity (unless there is a really good reason).
Oh, if he's a good man, then he will weigh everything before he decides that he does not want to move and is not willing to move with you.
Six_Three_Sigma
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12-20-2001, 03:59 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Apr 2001
Location: Free and nearly 53 in San Diego and Lake Forest, CA
Posts: 7,331
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Answer: C
I would also say take the job and see how the relationship works out. If it doesn't work out, you still have a wonderful job and a way to support yourself.
Now if it were some trifling man, definitely B.
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12-20-2001, 06:05 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2001
Location: AT THE LIBRARY
Posts: 6,666
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Personally, I'd talk to my bf about the promotion. If he doesn't seem to be enthusiastic or encouraging about me getting the promotion, then he can get the finger AND the boot! I always remember a couple of lines from Dr. Dre's song, "Been There, Done That." He said, "Ladies get your paper too. Don't expect for no man to support you. Keep it true." And I will surely do that and then some!!! I can always find someone else who can support me wholeheartedly.
__________________
"Having a nasty attitude won't yield you the results you want when you want them; it'll just make people steer clear of you and your toxicity in order to keep from being contaminated by you and your nastiness."- Me
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12-21-2001, 11:11 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Feb 2001
Posts: 658
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Do YOUR thang girl!!!!!
If I was in this particular situation I would first evaluate our relationship. If the relationship is STRONG I would still pursue my promotion and pray that our relationship could withstand the distance and the stress that come along with being in a long distance relationship and ole boy would have X amount of time to get his chit and move with me and my promotion.
On the other hand if the relationship is not amounting to NOTHING then get your bags packed. You won't be alone because you have Sorors in every city you go and GOD will NEVER leave you or forsake you so you are set with or without ole boy...PUHLEEZE BELIEVE when the weather hits HOT I'ma be HOT like FIRE trying to road trip to see you!!
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12-21-2001, 11:53 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: St. Louis
Posts: 12
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I'd leave, after all you are not married to the guy. There is no telling where the relationship will be in the future. You may not even be together. I'd regret not taking the promotion if the relationship did not work out.
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12-24-2001, 03:43 AM
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Join Date: May 2001
Location: In my skin, when I hop out, you can hop right in
Posts: 1,181
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Definitely C: Other
I'd really have to do a lot of analyzing for this one.
First, I would look at the relationship side of the problem. I'd have to know how serious my relationship is and if if has the potential to get more serious. In this day and age, love, and I mean true love, doesn't come easily. And, I don't know if I'd be willing to give that up so quickly. Money isn't everything. Also, I'd have to consider why my man won't come with me. If he has some vested interest in the town where we are, like a sick family member or a business he owns.
Then, I'd have to look at the job side. If the only reason that I want to go is for the money, then I'd probably stay. Money isn't everything and my happiness is worth more than whatever the new company would be offering me. If this was my dream job, or a major promotion, like from cashier to store owner, then I might have to go. And finally, I'll see exactly how far away it is. If it's anything less than three hours, then there would be no conflict between it and my relationship. Me and my man could see each other as often as we wanted to.
Ultimately, I would have to weigh my reasons to stay against my reasons to go. Whichever side has more, wins. Knowing me, I'd probably take the job and still try to make my relationship work.
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05-03-2002, 11:31 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2001
Posts: 1,556
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Re: Relationship Dilemma Question
Quote:
Originally posted by CrimsonTide4
B. Dump him and move on up to the East side .
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C-ya next life MF!
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05-06-2002, 06:20 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2000
Location: Tamarac, Florida, USA
Posts: 80
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Whoa,
That's a complicated issue. That would be a really hard decision for me and I wouldn't expect my mate to follow me just like I wouldn't think that he'd expect me to stay and miss out on an opportunity. I'm not with the long distance relationship, so if one decides to leave, I say dump him. I gues it depends on what's most important to you. If I'm pretty comfortable and making a good living where I'm at, than I would stay with the love of my life, because these days a good man is harder to find than a good job. This guy would have to be someone I've been with for awhile though not just someone I've had some whirl wind romance with and I think we have something serious, when we may not.
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