Hi everyone I'm Scott and I need some help with my situation - Page 2

knight_shadow · #16 03-10-2012, 11:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gusteau

Not quite. Delta Chi will allow someone to resign their membership, but we will not provide a letter stating they may join another group. I know we're not alone in this.

From what I understood, the letter didn't have to say "knight_shadow is no longer XYZ and is free to join ABD" -- it just had to say "knight_shadow is no longer XYZ"

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottieBoy

Well I have talked to one of the Sigma Pi members and he said it was fine however, I haven't reached the president to talk about it yet. My previous fraternity president has said it was fine if I disaffilated and could join another fraternity. I also talked to a Theta Chi member and he said I would need to talk to the president. So at this point, I guess I will call each fraternity president and see if they would allow it or not. I will also visit by the IFC office again sometime soon. And @33girl, thats how unorganized my previous fraternity was, we didn't have any elections for which positions people wanted. It was pretty much whoever rose there hand first got the job. However, at the time I was taking a lot of units and didn't have much time to put my complete effort into that position so I opted on doing it later.

I've also talked to multicultural fraternities and they were welcome to let me join and even gave me a bid this semester. However, I didn't take it because I didn't want to rush blindly like before and make a mistake. I want to explore my options then decide. If it helps, I suppose I can name my previous fraternity.

I doubt that those bids would still hold after you turned them down to join another organization (unless they're hurting for members).

knight_shadow · #17 03-10-2012, 11:06 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottieBoy

These are the NPHC Chapters
Sigma Pi
Sigma Alpha Epsilon

Pi Kappa Phi

Those are not NPHC organizations.

ETA: The CSULB Greek website is all kinds of fucked up. It lists Alpha and Iota as NPHC sororities, Zeta Phi Beta as a non-NPHC sorority, and Sigma Lambda Beta as a "cultural sorority" #QualityControl

I hope the OP knows how to do research without relying on that mess of a site.

http://www.csulb.edu/greek/chapters/

AlwaysSAI · #18 03-10-2012, 11:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottieBoy

These are the NPHC Chapters
Sigma Pi
Sigma Alpha Epsilon

Pi Kappa Phi

Total lane swerve, but I'm wondering why the above fraternities are listed as NPHC. Aren't they NIC, nationally?

jazing · #19 03-10-2012, 11:24 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

Those are not NPHC organizations.

ETA: The CSULB Greek website is all kinds of fucked up. It lists Alpha and Iota as NPHC sororities, Zeta Phi Beta as a non-NPHC sorority, and Sigma Lambda Beta as a "cultural sorority" #QualityControl

I hope the OP knows how to do research without relying on that mess of a site.

http://www.csulb.edu/greek/chapters/

It also doesn't list all the fraternities. I did a quick search, we're there as well

https://www.facebook.com/aepilb

Gusteau · #20 03-10-2012, 11:26 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

From what I understood, the letter didn't have to say "knight_shadow is no longer XYZ and is free to join ABD" -- it just had to say "knight_shadow is no longer XYZ"

Ok, I see where you're coming from. For us at least, we will not provide a letter at all.

knight_shadow · #21 03-10-2012, 11:28 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Gusteau

Ok, I see where you're coming from. For us at least, we will not provide a letter at all.

So if I were to ask to disaffiliate, what proof would exist? Does HQ just remove me from the rolls and keep moving? Or do I get something in the mail saying "Hey k_s, your membership ended as of 1/2/12 and you lose all rights as a brother as of that date."?

(This is me being curious. If this is not something that you can/want to share, that's completely fine)

Gusteau · #22 03-10-2012, 11:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

So if I were to ask to disaffiliate, what proof would exist? Does HQ just remove me from the rolls and keep moving? Or do I get something in the mail saying "Hey k_s, your membership ended as of 1/2/12 and you lose all rights as a brother as of that date."?

(This is me being curious. If this is not something that you can/want to share, that's completely fine)

You know, I'm not sure about that one. My inclination is to say you would receive written communication, but I really don't know. If you did receive written notice, I guess you could send that to the new group.

As often happens this much ado about a situation that is not very common.

knight_shadow · #23 03-11-2012, 01:47 AM

I thought you were drowning in bids? It sounds like you're just trying to join whoever will take you. That's kind of lame.

Ask the people on your campus. Even if the fraternity HQ permits it, there's no telling what the chapter will do.

WCsweet<3 · #24 03-11-2012, 02:06 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottieBoy

Anyone know about Kappa Sigma? I heard they weren't in NIC anymore...so would that be an option?

Kappa Sigma Fraternity is no longer in NIC*. However, that may not change their ideas on lifelong membership. I suggest you research at many of the fraternities you are interested in. Many (potentially most, I didn't look them all up) mention lifelong membership in their mottos, values etc. It's kind of a big deal. I would suggest really sitting down and decide why you want to join another fraternity. Is it really because your fraternity wasn't big enough? Because they didn't allow you to take a leadership role (which you said you may not have been able to give all your attention?)? What do you think you will get out of being in a larger fraternity that would be different than the one you were in?

*On the NIC wikipedia page, they source GC for this information.

princessamy · #25 03-11-2012, 11:23 AM

Just because they say that they would take you doesn't mean that they would. No matter how desperate they are for numbers I doubt they would take someone who not only pledged but initiated into another organization and now wants to quit cus things aren't "working" for him. The truth is the grass isn't always greener on the other side.

33girl · #26 03-11-2012, 12:09 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottieBoy

Anyone know about Kappa Sigma? I heard they weren't in NIC anymore...so would that be an option?

Not being in NIC has zero to do with your question. They are still a social fraternity. Not only that, they are often on the IFC at individual schools. They just aren't a national dues paying member.

Gusteau · #27 03-11-2012, 12:11 PM

Now that you've disclosed your school, I have a very hard time believing your Greek advisor would tell you this is ok. I know her, and she definitely would not have advised you as such, knowing all that you've disclosed in this thread.

ASTalumna06 · #28 03-11-2012, 02:57 PM

I'm going to revert back to your original "problem"...

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottieBoy

At the time when I pledging, they only had about 20 guys and now that I was initiated about a year ago, we still have only 20 guys because either people would drop or we would never get any pledges. For example, they only got 2 pledges this semester. It is really frustrating because everyone in the fraternity is lazy and never wants to do anything. I tried being rush chair however, they wouldn't allow it and even if I did, it would hard to compete with the bigger fraternities.

I find it interesting that you use the term "they" ... "THEY only had about 20 guys," and "THEY only got 2 pledges this semester," and "THEY wouldn't allow [me to be rush chair]"... There's no responsibility on your part.

You were only a member for a year, and you bailed because "they" wouldn't give you the position of rush chair. You DO realize you can recruit new members without having that position, right?

You could have tried to turn the chapter around. If you had put even half the effort in to your old chapter as you're putting into finding a new fraternity who will take you, you might have been perfectly content in your old chapter by now.

If you rush at these other fraternities, what do you plan to tell them regarding why you left the other?

LaneSig · #29 03-11-2012, 09:15 PM

FYI- Sigma Chi does not allow members who have previously been initiated into other fraternities.

MysticCat · #30 03-12-2012, 09:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by knight_shadow

Huh? Are you saying that a HQ will not honor someone's request to disaffiliate (regardless of that person's motivations)?

Well, fwiw it's worth, we (not NIC) specifically have in our governing documents that a member cannot resign membership. The only way for membership to be terminated is expulsion.

Quote:

Originally Posted by ScottieBoy

Well I have talked to one of the Sigma Pi members and he said it was fine however, I haven't reached the president to talk about it yet. My previous fraternity president has said it was fine if I disaffilated and could join another fraternity. I also talked to a Theta Chi member and he said I would need to talk to the president. So at this point, I guess I will call each fraternity president and see if they would allow it or not. I will also visit by the IFC office again sometime soon.

Just know that just because these folks are telling you that everything would be fine (1) that doesn't mean they are abiding by the rules they're supposed to abide by, (2) that doesn't mean you'd get a bid, and (3) just because they'd allow it or give you a bid doesn't mean it would be honorable.

Quote:

If it helps, I suppose I can name my previous fraternity.

Please do.