Are You A Godparent?

[Special1920]

Don't be sorry for me, it was a lesson learned. What I learned from that experience is that you can give all you have, and it's still never enough for some. I just feel that the definition of Godparents has been lost in the commercialism of it. It sounds cute, but if something happens to the parents it's suppose to be the godparent who steps in and raise that child, but how often does that happen?

[amycat412]

I am my 9 year old niece's Godmother. I adore this child so much it is not even funny! My brother and his ex-wife have a volatile relationship and it is hard on Adrienne. I try to be her friend as well as a stable and steadying influence in her life and was recenlty moved to tears when she told everyone Auntie Amy is her best friend. I swear, it is INSANE how much I love her!!!


I am about to become a godmother again to my best friend's son Alex and I can't wait! Baby Alex is due on 12/18!


Amy

[bluz4]

right now i am not a godparent. my closest cousin and friend announced over thanksgiving that she is pregnant and i would really like her to ask me to be her child's godparent. besides the baby's father and her mother, i will probably be the one taking her to dr.'s appts and such. i am hoping she asks me. my mother said that suggesting or even hinting to her would be inappropriate because that is something that a mother must think carefully and choose wisely about. does anyone else have any thoughts?

[darling1]

special,

you just sounded bitter in your post but it seems like you took the situation for what is was worth. unfortunately many people take the term godparent too loosely. i know that if anything were to happy to her parents my godchild will be taken care of. my husband and i have a lot of love to give and i am too sensitive to make the same mistakes that my godparents made.

[darling1]

Originally posted by bluz4
right now i am not a godparent. my closest cousin and friend announced over thanksgiving that she is pregnant and i would really like her to ask me to be her child's godparent. besides the baby's father and her mother, i will probably be the one taking her to dr.'s appts and such. i am hoping she asks me. my mother said that suggesting or even hinting to her would be inappropriate because that is something that a mother must think carefully and choose wisely about. does anyone else have any thoughts?

bluz,


i agree with your mother. if this is something that you really desire, take to the Lord.

[sphinxpoet]

Yes I am a god parent! I have a young lady as my GodChild!

Sphinxpoet

[Ideal08]

I am a Godparent. I would raise those children if anything happens to my bestfriend and their father. I used to think that I would just take them whether he was alive or not, but now, I think he's changing, so we'll see. Either way, I would help him all I could with the kids. I love my babies!!

As far as the religious aspect, the kids don't go to church with me, they go with their mom.

[prayerfull]

I didn't fully understand the role of Godparents until I became a parent myself. My husband and I selected my sister and her husband to be Godparents of both of our children because when it comes down to it, if something was to ever happen to us, we are comfortable that they would take care of our children and raise them as we would.

My college roomate was on the phone with me a little while back and she was saying to me, in between puffs and drags on a cigarette and sips from her glass of E&J, "how come you never asked me to be a Godparent". So, I politely said to her that my husband and I know that when it comes down to it my sister and her husband are able to raise our children as we do now. I was thinking about this though, for real, because she's my girl and I love her to death but plain and simple, she's wild. She was buck wild in college and is still wild now.

The Christening Ceremony is really a serious thing and I trip off of some young parents who come up in church, some of them have never stepped foot in church before that day, they select their "boys" and "homegirls" to be Godparents, without sincere thought into what it's all about. Parents and Godparents alike make a vow in this ceremony to raise the child, as God would have us do. I shed a few tears when both of my children were Christened and I take it all very seriously.

[lil_sunshine]

I'm the godmother of four beautiful children, with one on the way (my best friend is expecting for the 4th time in 5 years), 2 girls and 2 boys. I think it's a beautiful thing and I would encourage other people to take part in this role. I don't have godparents, so this role is very important to me. I understand the roles and responsibilities of being a godparent, and I'm handling it the best way I can, one day at a time.

[BabyBlue91]

I am reviving this thread because of what I perceived as trifling chit with the mother of my godsons yesterday over Christmas gifts.

I have known this girl since high school, and her sons are my godchildren. I moved to a different town this summer, and I hadn't been in touch since the younger child's birthday. Last weekend I called to see what the kids might be looking for for Christmas, and she indicated that the younger child was interested in all things fireman -- namely, a fire engine. She said that a local store in the area had a truck. I told her that if I bought it I would call her back.

So on Saturday my fiance and I finished our holiday shopping (or so we thought). When we went to Target, I saw two fire trucks manufactured by Tonka. I think both have lights and sound effects. My FH suggested I buy the smaller (read: less expensive) one (although I wasn't overly concerned with the price), and I did. We never made it to the other store.

Yesterdat the kids' mom called me at work to ask if I bought the specific engine and I said that I hadn't. I did mention that Tonka was a good brand and rattled off all the features I could remember.

After a long silence, Mom suggested that I take the fire engine I bought back to Target and select something else -- she'd buy the other engine herself, and there was no point in the boy having two. (BTW, I looked at a circular for the other store, and the engine in question -- radio control, much bigger -- was $60. The recipient of this item is four years old.)

Needless to say, I am highly offended, as I told my cousin yesterday. When I told my fiance about it this morning, he brought up all the times he and his sisters didn't get anything for Christmas. To rectify this "problem," I ordered (online) a gift certificate in a nominal amount, and because it's so late in the month there's no guarantee they'll get it by Christmas Eve.

In the meantime, I called the Student Activities Office at my school and the assistant director told me they'll be more than happy to have the offending fire engine, the Spider-Man doll I bought for the 6-year-old, and the crayons and coloring/activity books I bought for each of them (grand total $30) for the department's "Angel Tree." I wanted to give to a toy drive anyway, and now I don't have to make another trip to the store.

This course of events will certainly color my decision when I select my wedding party (getting married next fall).

Thanks for listening. What would you all have done?

[AKA2D '91]

I would have asked the mother if she was on crack (you know it's wack ).

It seems your friend takes you for granted (MO). You DO NOT have to spend one penny on her children. Even though, it's not the children's fault, buying the gift certificates was a good idea. Your friend was out of order. She could have taken the gifts back AFTER Christmas if she didn't like what you purchased.

Next year, send them a card with some money in it. You may come out cheaper anyway. Or, donate gifts to a charity in the kid's name. Then, see what their mother says about that. Since SHE isn't appreciative, maybe other kids will be appreciative of the gifts you donate to them in HER kids' name. Make sure you send her the notice of what you have done.

[stardusttwin]

I don't think the children should suffer because of their mother - seems to me they need your influence more now than ever (the true meaning of Christmas is not a laundry list of "acceptable" toys.)

My response? I would have said "I'll take your suggestion under advisement", wrap the toy and let her get over it Christmas morning - I doubt the child would have opened the gift and said "oh- this isn't the one I wanted!" If in the future she continues to make an issue out of things (specifying purchases) I would just buy savings bonds every year on special occasions and hold them until the child is 18.

Personally I'd also wrap a piece of coal to put in her stocking .

[lovele1978]

I am the godmother of my bestfriends 3 year old daughter (who is also my son's godmother) and "was" (long story) the godmother of my cousin's 7 year old daughter. I love them both dearly and treat the 3yr old as if she is my own child (since my cousin is loony and has pretty much cut off most of the family). My friend had a rocky relationship during her pregnancy and I was there with her in the delivery room, even cut the umbilical cord!!

I don't think that in this day and age that the Godparents role is specifically someone that would care for the child in the event that something happens to both parents, but is also away to bring someone closer into the childs life. At least that is the reason why I chose the godparents that I did.

Question: What do you guys think about naming family members as Godparents as opposed to non-family?

[allsmiles_22]

Originally posted by BabyBlue91

Thanks for listening. What would you all have done?

I would have bought what was specifically asked for. Yes, I know it's the thought that counts and you didn’t have to buy anything at all, but the fact is you asked and you implied you might get that truck from that store. She probably knows she can get a fire truck from anywhere, but she told you a specific store. I’m not a parent, but I can understand wanting to please or go all out for someone. When you have children, you’ll probably encounter this situation and end up in her shoes.

I'm not sure how your friend sounded and maybe her attitude wasn't that great. She may have been upset because she planned on this specific truck being the main item she wanted to give her son for Christmas. Find out her reasons for being upset. If you have known her since high school, you don't want something so small to ruin your friendship.

When I was younger, I wanted the whole group of Barbie and the Rockers. I asked different family members to get me a different member. In the end, I didn't get the whole group but got those other fake me out plastic dolls instead. I was upset and 20 something years later I'm still holding a grudge.

[sphinxpoet]

I have 3 God Children.....and I see myself as a spiritual advisor to get closer to Jesus Christ, an example of the triumphs and failures of people and support mentally to my young God Children. One is 14 the other are little babies(less than a year). If the time should ever come that thier parents pass this world then I and whoever the Godmother is becomes the source of parenthood in thier lives. NOW that being said I LOVE MY GOD MOTHER AND GOD FATHER. They were always there for me and never missed a bday!

Sphinxpoet

Smelling what he is cooking!