African American women in CPC, opinions, please?

[33girl]

Originally Posted by WhiteDaisy128

What do your advisers think of this? I know our recruitment/membership advisers in school would NEVER allow this to even be an issue. We looked for certain qualities in PNMs regardless of race, religion, disability, etc.

You're lucky. At some schools, the advisors are the very ones who are clinging to this mindset when the chapter itself is completely color blind.

To the OP: I could tell you to be a martyr, self-terminate and make sure everyone knows exactly why. That's asking a lot of you though.

Are these girls freshmen or are they older - that is, have they already had time to think about NPHC groups. I'm just saying this in the context of are they jumping on NPC because it's all they can jump on now, or because they truly want what your sorority has vs what an NPHC group has.

[USM2012]

Originally Posted by 33girl

Are these girls freshmen or are they older - that is, have they already had time to think about NPHC groups. I'm just saying this in the context of are they jumping on NPC because it's all they can jump on now, or because they truly want what your sorority has vs what an NPHC group has.

It's a long story, but we know both personally. They know what the want.

[rhoyaltempest]

I know this doesn't fix the problem but I really wish that minority women especially would consider ALL their options including NPHC (not that we can be sure these ladies haven't) because if I see one more "I'm in an NPC but now want to pledge NPHC" on sites like yahoo answers...

Do the research people. So you can make an informed decision.

[IrishLake]

Originally Posted by USM2012

Recruitment is coming up very soon, and we have a large number of black ladies signed up for recruitment. We are in the deep south, so even though it isn't always obvious, racial tension is here. There are 2 black girls that i would LOVE to have in my chapter. They would be great assets and would fit in, I think.

A few days ago in meeting, we asked if anyone would have a problem with giving a bid to a black woman. No one said anything, and I can't think of anyone in particular who would be bothered enough to complain. Our recruitment chair said to contact her privately if you wanted to. Well, someone apparently talked to her, and now they're saying they don't want to give a bid to a black girl because it will split our chapter, and nothing is worth splitting the chapter over.

It's not really for "racist" reasons, but more for a concern of what others will think (which I don't particularly think is an excuse at all, but that's just me). A few members are concerned because no one on campus in CPC has ever done it before, and we lost a huge group of seniors and half of my pledge class is gone. We have been one of the largest on campus for years, but in the last couple months, are numbers are suffering, and they don't want to do anything that nobody else is doing to risk making quota. I understand not risking whatever it is we're apparently risking by giving a bid to some random girl we don't really care for, but I think that if we really really love a girl, it's completely racist to cut her just because of her race.

This is really eating away at me and I would love some objective opinions. I love my chapter more than life itself, but the idea that we could be so shallow really hurts me. What do you guys think?

QFP
Stay on the ball people!

[SthrnZeta]

.

[AXiDTrish]

My collegiate Greek system went through this in the late 1990's. One year we had a PNM go through recruitment who wrote that she was a NPHC legacy on her application. During recruitment we learned that she was a white PNM who's step-mother was African-American. Before we learned that though, it started dialogue. The interesting thing I found was that we, the active sisters, were open so long as she was a good fit with the chapter. Her race didn't matter. It was the alumnae who made their opinion known. My chapter was less than 20 years old at the time so these were younger alumnae. I was really surprised and quite honestly still think of those alumnae differently. They lost my respect by their comments.

A couple years later, an African American PNM did go through recruitment. Our chapter LOVED this PNM and wanted to give her a bid, but she wasn't anywhere near our grade requirement and we had to release her. Sisters were in tears. She went through recruitment successfully and received a bid to another chapter were she was a pretty incredible sister. I will say this also, my chapter was the low one on the totem pole back then and had she had grades, they would have accepted her regardless of her race. My chapter is no longer on the bottom of the totem pole and they have a number of African-American women in their chapter.

Don't be afraid of change on your campus, embrace it. If the women are smart, good quality women and the gel with your chapter, then offer them sisterhood.

[AOII Angel]

Hmmm. The "afraid of how other people will think of us" reasoning in south Mississippi is a nice code phrase for "I don't want a black sister." Your sister is racist even if she doesn't want to admit it to herself. That's what racism is. "We're better than ____ so we can't have them in our group." If these girls are up to your sororities standards and combating this thought process is important to you, make an issue about it. If you think the opinion is wider spread than just one sister, don't bother, it will tear your chapter apart, and you may end up with an eyeopening experience.

[AOpilicious]

been there done that. it's very hard for a southern chapter when they take their first black member. But once they get over it, they realize it's not as big of a deal and all those tears were just silly.

I was a current adviser when a black potential member was encouraged to rush by a member in the chapter. That was probably my most horrible moment watching young ladies not live our ritual - who otherwise were awesome in every way. and worse, was witnessing alumnae getting involved on the wrong side of the issue.

It made me physically ill.

The second time I experienced it, I was just a regular "kitchen alum" OMG with the mascara stained faces. and I was forever thankful that I was not part of the advisory group to deal with that voting night.

So after much needless ado the lady in question was invited to preference and then she (HA!) placed another sorority first on her bid list which is where she matched.

I think that was an enormous lesson in humility for everyone involved.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by AOpilicious

been there done that. it's very hard for a southern chapter when they take their first black member.

Not all chapters in the South are the same -- what's hard for some may not be as hard for others. Generalizations are not needed.

[ree-Xi]

Originally Posted by USM2012

Recruitment is coming up very soon, and we have a large number of black ladies signed up for recruitment. We are in the deep south, so even though it isn't always obvious, racial tension is here. There are 2 black girls that i would LOVE to have in my chapter. They would be great assets and would fit in, I think.

A few days ago in meeting, we asked if anyone would have a problem with giving a bid to a black woman. No one said anything, and I can't think of anyone in particular who would be bothered enough to complain. Our recruitment chair said to contact her privately if you wanted to. Well, someone apparently talked to her, and now they're saying they don't want to give a bid to a black girl because it will split our chapter, and nothing is worth splitting the chapter over.

It's not really for "racist" reasons, but more for a concern of what others will think (which I don't particularly think is an excuse at all, but that's just me). A few members are concerned because no one on campus in CPC has ever done it before, and we lost a huge group of seniors and half of my pledge class is gone. We have been one of the largest on campus for years, but in the last couple months, are numbers are suffering, and they don't want to do anything that nobody else is doing to risk making quota. I understand not risking whatever it is we're apparently risking by giving a bid to some random girl we don't really care for, but I think that if we really really love a girl, it's completely racist to cut her just because of her race.

This is really eating away at me and I would love some objective opinions. I love my chapter more than life itself, but the idea that we could be so shallow really hurts me. What do you guys think?

I am reading a dissertation about what positive changes could happen if NPC sorority women would live their lives according to their rituals. I'm only about 40 pages into it (written by Mari Ann Callais... a great read, I must add). If these women fit your ideal, they have the grades, can fulfill every other requirement (full-time student, campus involvement, can pay dues), there should be no concern. I don't get it. Maybe I am naive, but I don't get it.

ONE PERSON spoke against it (privately). Is this really something that can "split" your entire chapter?

[USM2012]

Sorry guys, I wasn't trying to start drama. I wanted to post both sides so that other greeks could give me advice. I feel like the whole thing is shallow and we should be past things like this, but it's not me.

So my question is now? What should I do?

[agzg]

Originally Posted by USM2012

So my question is now? What should I do?

Well, at the end of the day, you can only follow your chapter's member selection policies, and hope that others do as well. You can talk it into the ground, but it might not change anything.

Members of your chapter cannot bar these women from going through recruitment at all, so if theyr'e worthwhile, meet standards, and [insert member selection criteria + voting results here] for your chapter and recieve a bid, then cross that bridge when you get there. If they don't and/or don't get the dart through their name while you're wearing all of your catsuits, then hopefully they'll meet another chapter's standards and will be picked up.

Members of miniorities in chapters on my campus was a not-altogther uncommon thing (considering the overall racial makeup of the school population), but my campus is a-typical in just about every way and probably a complete 180 from yours.

[USM2012]

Originally Posted by agzg

Well, at the end of the day, you can only follow your chapter's member selection policies, and hope that others do as well. You can talk it into the ground, but it might not change anything.

Members of your chapter cannot bar these women from going through recruitment at all, so if theyr'e worthwhile, meet standards, and [insert member selection criteria + voting results here] for your chapter and recieve a bid, then cross that bridge when you get there. If they don't and/or don't get the dart through their name while you're wearing all of your catsuits, then hopefully they'll meet another chapter's standards and will be picked up.

Thanks for the reply. I really hope that things work out. I like to think that my sisters will do what's right when the time comes, but I can't know for sure. This is my first time going through recruitment, so people won't really listen to me. I will quit the chapter if we love a girl but cut her only because of her race. I love my sisters, but I can't be a part of something that goes against everything I stand for.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by USM2012

Thanks for the reply. I really hope that things work out. I like to think that my sisters will do what's right when the time comes, but I can't know for sure. This is my first time going through recruitment, so people won't really listen to me. I will quit the chapter if we love a girl but cut her only because of her race. I love my sisters, but I can't be a part of something that goes against everything I stand for.

I do understand that. Please understand that if you terminate your membership you will be ineligible for membership in any other NPC or NPHC sorority at any point in time.

[preciousjeni]

Originally Posted by USM2012

I will quit the chapter if we love a girl but cut her only because of her race.

I would too.