How expensive are newborns?

[KSUViolet06]

If you are concerned about finances, I'd suggest getting another job, at least for now. I don't think anyone can give you an exact dollar amount concerning the cost of a newborn, but there are alot of expenses involved.

I'm going to assume that you are currently starting to save some money, but if you're not, start doing so now. You never know what could happen and it's a MUST to have enough savings.

If you do not have health insurance, get it now. You need it.

I'd suggest clipping coupons for stuff you WILL for sure be buying ALL the time (formula, diapers, wipes). I'd also suggest buying those items in bulk too if you can.

My friends with kids always tell me that when you start buying baby clothes, it's good to buy clothes in a VARIETY of sizes. Don't buy all newborn sized clothing. Kids grow SO quickly and they will outgrow the newborn items within a month or 2.

I also suggest shopping around for things like swings, strollers, cribs, etc. on eBay or Amazon. You can also find some good deals at yard sales.

Also: If you have friends with kids, talk to them! They are the best source of info on what items are essential and what's a waste of money. As their kids grow up, they may be willing to give/sell you guys some of the stuff their kids don't need anymore.

Last thing: By the time he/she gets to college, it's going to cost alot. So plan on saving for that.

[ComradesTrue]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

I'd also suggest buying those items in bulk too if you can.

Be careful about this. Sometimes a smaller box of diapers is cheaper per diaper than the jumbo size or the one marked "value pack."

[ree-Xi]

Originally Posted by Blondie93

Be careful about this. Sometimes a smaller box of diapers is cheaper per diaper than the jumbo size or the one marked "value pack."

Always look at the "Unit Price" - the price per item/ounce/etc. Because of differences in product sizes, amounts, etc., you're not always comparing apples to apples.

[Kevin]

Find out whether your state requires you to pay for the costs related to the birth. Some states force the father to reimburse the state or the mother for those costs. Also, figure out what child support is going to cost. Start saving ASAP for the birth if you have to pay for it. It ain't cheap.

As for figuring up child support, you can usually find an online calculator, just run this search in Google and you should get something:

[yourstatenamehere] & "Child Support Calculator"

It is not always automatic that mom gets custody, so she might even be paying you depending on how things turn out.

If you're not getting married, see if y'all can't agree to some sort of visitation schedule. Many states have different visitation schedules for newborns. I think that's complete BS of course. If mom's breastfeeding, buy her a pump so the kid won't starve during your time and things should be a-okay. Were I in your shoes, I'd be shooting for *immediate* 50/50 time and whatever species of joint custody the state has which leaves neither parent with superior rights to make the major decisions in the kid's life.

Your lawyer can give you the specifics on how to accomplish things... just realize that the sky is pretty much the limit as to what you can agree to with your babymomma. Work with her and develop a good, non-adversarial parenting relationship with her. Demand that she respect your rights as a parent, but go out of your way to respect hers as well. Parents who can't agree on simple, simple things pay my bills, so remember that your goal is to someday put your kid through college -- not put your lawyer's kid through college.

[lauralaylin]

Second consignment sales. I'd never heard of them until I moved to the south, and they are fabulous. I have picked up tons of adorable and barely worn clothes for only a couple of dollars each, and this includes brand names like Ralph Lauren. Plus they have tons of gear, tons of toys, everything you could possibly need.

Also check out craigslist. I found most of my nursery furniture that way and this time around have found all my slings and other gear through it.

There are a lot of lists online about what you do or do not need. Some people think things that I loved are a waist (like swings, mine was a lifesaver), but they'll tell you that some things like wipe warmers aren't usually necessary. Every child is different and will like different things, so you may want to wait to buy some of those types of things until the baby is born. Don't forget that you can still shop.

One final thought. Now is the time to get the part time job. Keep in mind that your SO may need you at home more once the baby comes. I had very bad PPD after no depression issues ever, came as a total shock. I needed my husband home as much as he could be so I could get a mental break. But ever if your SO doesn't have issues like that, she'll probably want a break regardless. Just keep that in mind.

[DrPhil]

GC should not be your first and main source of information.

Put on your big boy pants and, along with the mother of the child, figure this out.

[DaemonSeid]

Going back to that last thread...just think if you wore a condom and not listened to her, you wouldn't be reading these posts.

Hopefully that'll learn ya!

[gpb1874]

I have a 5 month old. We don't spend much on her. We don't have tons of toys and clothes and crap for her. She's content playing with her blankets, bink and a few stuffed animals. I buy diapers and wipes at Sam's Club. A box of 250 or so costs about $40 and lasts nearly a month. I don't remember what the wipes costs, but they're not too bad. I breastfeed, so it costs me nothing.

Sign up on websites like pampers.com or huggies.com and they send you coupons.

My Brother and SIL have a toddler and go way overboard - brand name clothes, tons of toys, you name it.

Check out websites like www.babycenter.com or babyzone.com. They have more info on estimated costs. I was reading that formula can cost around $1300 a year or more, which I think is ridiculous for someone to pay if you can breastfeed (some women struggle immensely or other factors come in to play that make it difficult or impossible). Seriously talk to the mom about breastfeeding. It is her decision and it is difficult to stick with, but there are many, many benefits for the baby, mom and your pocketbook. If you go the formula route, find their website and get the coupons. Many send $5 off coupons every month or so. Have your parents and friends sign up too and then they can give you the coupons they get.

As others mentioned, insurance is a must. Mom will have monthly, then bi-weekly and then weekly visits to her OB. Delivery is expensive even with insurance. You get bills for the mom and for the baby with the delivery. Baby has dr visits at 1 week, 2 weeks, 4 weeks, then 2, 4, 6 and 12 months for check ups. That's if the baby doesn't get sick or have health problems.

If you can work more now just to save up, it will help. Cut back on your expenses now to help save.

Start looking into day care if that will be needed. It is super expensive and depending on where you live, they often have waiting lists.

[SydneyK]

Originally Posted by gpb1874

Start looking into day care if that will be needed. It is super expensive and depending on where you live, they often have waiting lists.

Good suggestion. I put my name on a waiting list as soon as I found out I was pregnant. 4 years later, I'm still on that waiting list (unnecessarily at this point, but I'm staying on it just to see how long it actually takes).

Xanthus, according to this article, it costs $221,000 to raise a kid to age 17 (so, pre-college costs). If you can swing that second job, it's probably a good idea.

There's a store called Once Upon a Child - it calls itself a "gently used" store. I've been to several, some of which are better than others. If there's one near you, you should check it out. It's a great place to find good deals on all kinds of things (they have everything: cribs, strollers, clothes, etc...). As others have said, however, don't buy a used car seat.

[libelle]

You have received some great advice re 2nd job, coupons, daycare, etc. Save as much as you can now so that you can be around to help with the newborn.

If you are willing to accept hand-me-downs, let your family, friends and neighbors (even colleagues) who have older children know. Our neighbors started leaving stuff on the front porch: baby bathtubs, bouncy chairs, maternity clothes, etc. My colleagues gave us pack-n-plays, clothes, a high chair, etc. People just wanted to get it out of their homes ;-) We received so much that we were able to give some duplicates away. In the first year you need some gear for a very limited amount of time because the baby outgrows it so fast.

Breast feeding is the best for mom and baby. But it can be frustrating at first. YOU can make a difference in how successful the mom is.

[WinniBug]

Originally Posted by libelle

Breast feeding is the best for mom and baby. But it can be frustrating at first. YOU can make a difference in how successful the mom is.

SO TRUE!!!
It gets way easier after about 2 months, but the first 2 weeks or so can be quite difficult!

[DaffyKD]

Originally Posted by Xanthus

As everyone knows, I've got a kid on the way. We're expecting in April. I'm just trying to debate if I need to get a second job or not. Something part time. I hear newborns are expensive. How expensive are they? I'm only asking members who have kids, or have friends who have kids.

Thanks

You also need to consider unexpected costs. A sick child is costly if they need to go to the hospital, take expensive meds, have continual problems, etc. My daughter cost us doctors visits for normal sick kids. My son was born very sick and spent 75 days of his first year in and out of the hospital (including 20 days in the NICU). He had other hospital admissions, physical therapy, speech therapy, vision therapy, psychiatrist, tutoring to get through school, etc, BUT today he is thriving at the local community college and doing very well!

Best wishes!

DaffyKD

[Jill1228]

It's great, that you are getting second job. Hopefully she is working as long as she can during the pregnancy. If you can (and if it doesn't freak you out), go to as many appts with her as you can
Yup, the condom remark was SO uncalled for. What's done is done, and there is nothing you can do to change it, so why go there?
I know this sounds harsh, but are you going to get a DNA test?
I hope everything goes well, hon

[nikki1920]

You should really be talking to the mother of your kid about this, not asking random people on GC about this. There is no specific figure, it will vary based on where you live, where the mother lives in relation to you, whether your child is healthy, etc, etc, etc.

If you have to ask, get the second job, get yourself insurance, get a paternity test ASAP and keep it moving. You have more important things to worry about now that the opinions of an online chat community.

[KSigkid]

Originally Posted by DrPhil

Bingo.

They should do their research by looking up costs and talking to people IRL and, as a last resort, doing a Google search of the many baby boards.

Yeah...I mean, no offense to the people who have responded, but if I were planning for a kid, GC would be one of the last places I would go for advice.

Xanthus - don't you have any friends or relatives you can talk to about this?