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Welcome to our newest member, Qais8 |
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08-13-2010, 01:13 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: Tampa, FL
Posts: 197
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I totally feel for Cassie. I felt during rush as one group was not the right fit for me, but that is because we keep looking at what we could of had. I went to this group's preference and my feelings completely changed towards that sorority to where I could not of seen myself with them until the very last day. Please encourage Cassie to go to Pref and see what happens. If she still feels the same way, then she can drop from recruitment and try COB if they have it.
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08-13-2010, 01:15 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: here and there
Posts: 2,643
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl
How long does quota last? I mean, what is the time frame after formal rush when you can keep bidding to fill quota if you don't make it, if you're already at total? This is the thing that has always confounded me at these ginormous rushes. I know you can bid up to total (if you're not at total) any time.
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Quota lasts from one formal recruitment until its set at the next.
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08-13-2010, 01:15 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Feb 2010
Posts: 58
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I had a similar situation happen to me. Last year, I got dropped by my two favorites and so I only attended one pref - the one I wanted to get rid of all week. I talked to an amazing woman at that pref. The night before bid day, I didn't get a call, so I knew I had gotten a bid from that chapter, but I took a chance and went Greek. I'm SO glad that I decided to try it out and give them a chance. I've become super involved with my chapter and will probably run for a VP position this year! (I was a 2nd year when I went through recruitment the first time.) I love all of my sisters so dearly and know I've made friends for life.
Please encourage her to go to Pref. And if she does and gets a bid, but is still not feeling it, I would say give it a shot. She has until initiation. Sometimes it just takes some time to grow on you and for me it most certainly did!
I'm so glad to be part of my GLO.
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08-13-2010, 01:17 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jun 2003
Location: Kentucky
Posts: 5,725
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sweetmagnolia
They're allowed to do that?!
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Probably. Either they are having problems with PNM's using them/having them ring during parties, or they are trying to eliminate the possibility altogether of a PNM's cell phoen going off during a preference party.
If a PNM"s family has an emergency, they can call Panhellenic and Panhellenic will find that PNM/go get them. Recruitment & preference parties went off fine back in the days without cell phones. I'm sure PNM's not carrying them in to the parties will not hurt.
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08-13-2010, 01:19 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,023
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I think the biggie is that they don't want the girls calling friends or relatives to get advice on how to rank their final groups.
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08-13-2010, 01:21 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Mar 2007
Posts: 225
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl
How long does quota last? I mean, what is the time frame after formal rush when you can keep bidding to fill quota if you don't make it, if you're already at total? This is the thing that has always confounded me at these ginormous rushes. I know you can bid up to total (if you're not at total) any time.
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I am more of a lurker than a poster but I wanted to answer this question about Quota becasue it drives me crazy when incorrect info is given. Straight from the most recent MOI. I will say that many chapters prefer to fill those vacancies right away.
Each NPC fraternity chapter has the right to continuous open bid to
reach quota or its total allowable size during the regular school year as
defined by the school calendar.
There may also be a vacancies in quota if a woman negates her signed membership recruitment acceptance binding agreement, refuses to accept her matched bid at the conclusion of membership recruitment and does not participate in a ribbon or formal new member ceremony, this space in the chapter’s pledge quota was not filled. Therefore, the chapter may immediately bid and pledge another woman,even if the chapter is over total. However, if the chapter has received quota additions, the chapter may only pledge additional women to the established pledge quota and not to the quota plus quota additions. Example: If quota is 25, and a chapter receives quota (25) plus two quota additions for a total of 27 new members, and three new members do not accept their bids, the chapter may pledge one new member to fill to quota of 25.
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Last edited by gatordeltapgh; 08-13-2010 at 01:57 PM.
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08-13-2010, 01:26 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2005
Location: so cal
Posts: 910
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On instincts and Pref: By the end of rush no one has any "instincts" left. All the girls are exhausted mentally and physically. How many times have we heard that I went into A and cried, and B and cried, and C, my least favorite suddenly became number 1? This is, simply put, survival mode. Was it the "best" choice? Maybe, maybe not.
When I went through, during the dark ages, I wasn't "sure". All I knew was that I wasn't invited to any other houses other than the Jewish house because I am Jewish. I gave it a shot. Best thing I ever did. Friendships and alliances evolve.
The Reluctant One who went through sick and with attitude didn't have a clue about what she wanted until the end.
It is called in my book a leap of faith. There are so many times in life when you aren't "sure" about life changing events and you go for it. Things work out, sometimes far better than we ever believe. And here the it is the Pref party. Go for it. Or don't and wonder for the rest of your college days...what if?
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08-13-2010, 01:49 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 170
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Not sure there's any point in echoing the message, but she needs to be really certain that this group isn't for her, which is another good reason to go to pref. Also, as people have pointed out here and before, the membership of the sorority is about to change by 1/4 with the absorption of the new member class. She needs another chance to see what her NM class might look like, and she can't do that without going to pref. So she has feelings that the house isn't right for her. Those are important, but ask her what she thinks about her potential new member class. It is likely that she won't be able to answer because she's been so busy thinking about the actives - but all that will change with the new member class. So suggest she go to pref to give potential new members a chance - she may find that, looking around at the other PNMs at pref, that they seem more compatible with her than the actives do. And that's okay - every NM class has its own vibe, and it can really change a house. Of course, if she does go to pref, she needs to be as polite and positive as she can be. There always are disappointed girls at pref, and the sisters can feel it.
You all are in our prayers, not only for rush and the start of a new school year, but also because of the cancer diagnosis. This may be the time to put together the world's cutest care package.
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08-13-2010, 01:52 PM
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Super Moderator
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Posts: 14,023
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Lightning Bug!
This may be the time to put together the world's cutest care package.
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What she said! Maybe something orange and blue with big dots and her initials?
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08-13-2010, 01:58 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 170
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Ditto - this is the time to stress what a great privilege it is to be a sweet Auburn girl! Cute gifts and parties and fun times and friendship - these things are not just for sororities, and she needs to be reminded of that.
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08-13-2010, 01:59 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2010
Posts: 14
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My heart breaks for aumom2010 and Cassie. I will be praying for both of you!
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08-13-2010, 02:03 PM
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Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: Hotel Oceanview
Posts: 34,511
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Quote:
Originally Posted by gatordeltapgh
I am more of a lurker than a poster but I wanted to answer this question about Quota becasue it drives me crazy when incorrect info is given. Straight from the most recent MOI. I will say that many chapters prefer to fill those vacancies right away.
Each NPC fraternity chapter has the right to continuous open bid to
reach quota or its total allowable size during the regular school year as
defined by the school calendar.
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Huh. I'll be darned. I thought it was only until a week after FR or something - that quota expired like a coupon.
So say ABC has 200 members, is over campus total of 150, quota was 40 and they only took 25...for a myriad of reasons they don't decide to bid up to quota right after formal rush...can they take 15 girls later in the semester and have them as a second pledge class?
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It is all 33girl's fault. ~DrPhil
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08-13-2010, 02:14 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2005
Location: Beautiful West Michigan
Posts: 777
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Thanks for your kind words, gatordeltapgh. It is a different experience and until you live through it you really can't understand it. As an adviser you know what I am talking about.
I'm going to out myself and share that this retro recruitment story was mine. I only used a different name when I wrote it because my sorority name is already in my user name. But I think my story and the eventual results of my choice might be helpful for someone reading this thread. No, I didn't go to Auburn or an SEC school, but sorority life is what you make of it. I received a great blessing in my life by joining Tri Delta, even if it wasn't one of the most desirable groups on campus.
Girls can drop out and decide they are "too good" for the chapter or chapters they have remaining. But today I sit here a member of a GLO with a lifetime of opportunities. I never have to wonder what if.
Quote:
Originally Posted by gatordeltapgh
I really LOVE your post and thank you for your honesty! I completely understand becasue I have worked with a chapter in a similar situation and it IS really awful and hurful to be on that side of things. This was a lesson I did not learn until I started advising. Like many have said, you only spend a few short years in college and your "sorority life" really takes off after college. The goods news for the chapter I worked with is that our part of the country is a little more forgiving than the south, so with a little work and love the have flourished and accomplished amazing things in a short period of time.
Sallie - I am so glad you didn't pass up an opportunity to be part of an amazing group. I am assuming you are a Tri-Delta from your user-name. Tri-Delta is an amazing group and some of my very favorite NPC mentors are your sisters. Great lesson here. Thank you for posting.
P.S. I love your HQ building!
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"Let us found a society that shall be kind alike to all and think more of a girl's inner self and character than of her personal appearance." Sarah Ida Shaw
My recruitment story: My sorority membership changed my life.
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08-13-2010, 02:16 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2000
Location: near charlotte, nc, usa
Posts: 441
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Quote:
Originally Posted by 33girl
Huh. I'll be darned. I thought it was only until a week after FR or something - that quota expired like a coupon.
So say ABC has 200 members, is over campus total of 150, quota was 40 and they only took 25...for a myriad of reasons they don't decide to bid up to quota right after formal rush...can they take 15 girls later in the semester and have them as a second pledge class?
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Yes, they are able to do that.
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You.... have chosen to act as a snarky asshat- KATMANDU
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08-13-2010, 02:17 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Oct 2001
Posts: 2,943
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Oh my rec girl at AU has 3 awesome pref parties to attend! She is so excited. She said she would be happy at any of the 3! I'm getting some ideas together to be ready to send her a little gift!
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