The ramblings of a single woman... (TFKA ...crying pink and green tears...

[Honeykiss1974]

Originally posted by Ideal08


Worst cities for dating
2. Wichita, KS

WHEW! They ain't lying! Yall this city is only 8% black so if its THAT hard for the melanin-challenged, imagine what its like for sistahs!

Telling myself
God is forever faithful. Whomever He has for me is for me.....

[Steeltrap]

Originally posted by Ideal08
Best cities for dating
3. San Diego, CA

I have got to call BS on this one. I'm a native of S.D. and split my time between "the O.C." and San Diego. Not much pickings for sistahs, particularly those of us who are creeping on 40, as I've probably indicated in my earlier posts.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally posted by Ideal08
I hate dating. I think that's what I hate most about being single. Ok, let me clarify. I like to date, I think it's fun. What I hate is when it moves from more than just dating and friends to whatever is after that. Then the man gets to saying all types of isht. What I need is a class to teach me how to interpret the BS that some of these men spout. Because how can you tell what's real and what's not? And I thought women changed their minds a lot. Man, man, man. Men change their minds and then wonder how you got confused in the first place. BASTARD! I feel like I need a stenographer when y'all speak so that you can't say I got it twisted. I am so sick and tired of being confused and trying to figure it out. If I ask you a question, that means I WANT to know the answer. TELL THE TRUTH!!! Stop trying to spare peoples feelings. And if that's not what's up, then MAKE A FRIGGIN' DECISION.

I need to post those top ten cities for dating. Maybe we all need to relocate.

Soror Ideal--

I hate to say it, but if it ain't work or sports-related, then men do not make that much communcation attempts... Many of them are bruhs.

Lemme put it to you this way: Boys are taught to not share their feelings. To "share"--touchy feely stuh--your little feelings all bottled up inside you--just 'cuz--BULLISHT!!! Besides, folks begin to question their "manliness" and "preferences"... I wouldn't say 80% of men feel this way--more like 90% really do.

THEY JUST DON'T SHARE THAT WAY!!! NUNNA OF THAT DAYUM DR. PHILLE-TOUCHY CRAP!!! MOST MEN WANT TO JOIN THE NRA FOR THAT REASON, ALONE...

Prostelyzing is different. Dreaming about what it would be like in the future--you should see the responses. It does lead one to imply where a man's mind is... If he can't see himself in 2 minutes, how can he see himself in 2-5 years???

It is really easy to figure that chit out.

Now if he's convoluting the story--then SAWRAH--GWIRLFRIEND--he's got something to hide--AND usually it's BIG. Something you may not want to know...

Some men are "crafty"... Those are the one's you've got to watch your back and $$ on. They try to get you to tell them all kinna chit about yourself, including your credit card. Then they scam you and leave you hangin' high and dry.

Usually, I was so oblivious to those kinds of men that when they said some chit to me that didn't sound right--I was gone. Those type of men usually pick fights with you so that they can make themselves feel better for treating you like chit... Those men "MIND FCUK" many-a-woman...

To protect yourself from those types, you call their game... That's another post... For another day...

[oneinamillion]

I haven't been to this thread in a good minute but let me tell you. My sisters who are single or better yet not married...enjoy your single years. I've been on all sides-the married & happy side, -the married & still lonely side,-the married & whateva side, -the single & lonely as hell side,-the single , dating & think I got me a good man this time side. so i tell you like Dave Chappelle imitating Rick James..."ENJOY YOURSELVES"

[LB1914]

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
WHEW! They ain't lying! Yall this city is only 8% black so if its THAT hard for the melanin-challenged, imagine what its like for sistahs!

Telling myself
God is forever faithful. Whomever He has for me is for me.....

One of my boys from college lives up in Wichita. He says that the social climate is terrible. He is pretty much stuck there because of his job though.

[Honeykiss1974]

Originally posted by LB1914
One of my boys from college lives up in Wichita. He says that the social climate is terrible. He is pretty much stuck there because of his job though.

Tell him I said "What's up".

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no, for real. *lol*

[LB1914]

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
Tell him I said "What's up".

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no, for real. *lol*

Well he's not single. However, I could make a trip to Kansas if you'd like(just kidding)

[rho4life]

Originally posted by Attractive#7

I hate that sh*t. My ex told me that. You made me the man I am today. If it wasn't for us, I wouldn't know how to be a man or a good boyfriend...that's all well and dandy, but why in da blue hayull do you think that I wanna know that I made you a good man for the next chick to reap my benefits??? It's like you been playin the slot machine all nite, you turn you back and somebody else cash in and win your earnings.

If I had a dollar for everyone that I've "groomed", and they ended up not getting their shit together until they were with someone else........................

[AKA_Monet]

Originally posted by Ideal08
Best cities for dating
3. San Diego, CA

5. Seattle, WA

I can tell you if you are a sistah, you are not gonna be spoken to in both these cities. You'd have a better chance in L.A. becoming a movie star and making trillions of dollars before brutha man gets the kahonnas to ask a "true" sistah owt...

Worst cities for dating
1. Kansas City, MO
2. Wichita, KS
3. Minneapolis-St. Paul, MN
4. Detroit, MI
5. Louisville, KY
6. Greensboro/Winston-Salem, NC
7. Atlanta, GA
8. Pittsburgh, PA
9. Houston, TX
10. Charlotte, NC [/B]

I guess you need to add the best #3 and #5 to the worst...

The truism is that anywhere you go, there are good and bad parts of dating. Now, as sistahs, we don't have the luxury of men chivalarously chasing us down for a date. In fact, too many women out there throw themselves mercessily (sp?) on brutha man where only one component needs to have a thought process--and usually that just oozes out slimy stuff when up...

So for heterosexual African American women, if we choose to not cross the street, then how do you really attract the best and the brightest African American man that is not too much of a head trip?

[Honeykiss1974]

Ok, I hope no one gets offended or anything, but I have noticed that within this last two weeks, I have had a gaggle of melanin-challenged men approach me. Fine ones at that.

Seriously though. It has me because this has never happened to me before. Are they reading this thread? *lol*

So my question to my single sistahs....would you consider "stepping outside the box"?

[abaici]

I've toyed with the idea. Talked to a Latino guy once. From that experience I gathered that a man is a man. I love my brothas, but if love comes in another package, I'm not about to send it back.

[1savvydiva]

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
Ok, I hope no one gets offended or anything, but I have noticed that within this last two weeks, I have had a gaggle of melanin-challenged men approach me. Fine ones at that.

Seriously though. It has me because this has never happened to me before. Are they reading this thread? *lol*

So my question to my single sistahs....would you consider "stepping outside the box"?

Honestly, (and my sister and I were contemplating the possible reason for this), I've noticed that since I've gone natural I've gotten more attention from non-AA men. Go figure!

[Love_Spell_6]

Originally posted by Honeykiss1974
Ok, I hope no one gets offended or anything, but I have noticed that within this last two weeks, I have had a gaggle of melanin-challenged men approach me. Fine ones at that.

Seriously though. It has me because this has never happened to me before. Are they reading this thread? *lol*

So my question to my single sistahs....would you consider "stepping outside the box"?

HK74,
I've thought about it..and thought about it and just can't. BUt at the same time..its up to God...but I have expressed the desires of my heart to him...and I just pray he'll at least give me that LOL. Even with the finest men of any other race i.e. white or latino...I'm still not "really" attracted to them. Its just nothing like a brother in my opinion. I mean absolutely nothing. (Many white women agree with this I know if I got with a white or latino dude..I'd be settling cause I'd feel I couldn't find a good brother. Maybe because I'm still 4 years away from 30 I am not as "pressed" and because I believe that who God has for me, is for me, regardless of what I do and think...so I could be singing a different tune after the age of 35 if i were still single...but i guess i'll have to see..

[Jorrie96]

I was out at dinner last night and was asked the question would I date someone outside of my race. At this point in my life, if love blooms with someone who isn't Black I'm not going to turn my back on it.....

[Ideal08]

Originally posted by Love_Spell_6
HK74,
I've thought about it..and thought about it and just can't. BUt at the same time..its up to God...but I have expressed the desires of my heart to him...and I just pray he'll at least give me that LOL. Even with the finest men of any other race i.e. white or latino...I'm still not "really" attracted to them. Its just nothing like a brother in my opinion. I mean absolutely nothing. (Many white women agree with this I know if I got with a white or latino dude..I'd be settling cause I'd feel I couldn't find a good brother. Maybe because I'm still 4 years away from 30 I am not as "pressed" and because I believe that who God has for me, is for me, regardless of what I do and think...so I could be singing a different tune after the age of 35 if i were still single...but i guess i'll have to see..

Ditto, basically. Except I'm 30, and I'm still not THAT pressed. I, too, would feel like I was settling. And I'd always be ogling Black men and fantasizing about them. Oh, but I do that now. Holla at me in 5 years and see if I've changed my mind, lol.

Now, I will date non-AA men of color, meaning, still a part of the diaspora. AFRICAN diaspora. Let's be clear.