I guess I only kind of understand what you're saying. For me it has been much easier to just cut off all communication with my ex, even when we lived in the same small town (WAY small compared to NYC). But, that may have been because it was a very painful breakup and before we stopped speaking, all he ever did was try to make me feel like a bad person for doing things that hurt him in the past. It is also much easier not to have to see or hear or think about him and his new girlfriend, which he enjoyed rubbing in my face every time I talked to him.
I can't believe I ever considered marrying this man.
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