Rush - What to NOT do or say

[Rushez]

Thanks KSUViolet06!

[Alumiyum]

Do not tell a chapter you want to join or will be putting them first. You might change your mind. My chapter had a couple of girls that they really liked tell them on pref that they would be putting them first. Instead, both single preferenced the other sorority they preffed. I don't think either of them was trying to be rude or sneaky, they just changed their minds right before signing their pref cards. But it still hurt a lot of feelings that year. Instead, tell a chapter if you're interested in them if you are (do this!), but avoid saying they are your top choice, your only choice, or that you will be single preferencing them. That way you've left yourself room to change your mind (and you might...after my first pref I called my mom to tell her I was going XY, and then after the second party I single preferenced my sorority) without any hurt feelings.

But if you are interested in a chapter, even a tiny bit, show them. And if you are not, do not be rude. You certainly don't have to "like" every chapter. Sometimes you just don't have any common ground. But always be polite. They'll be able to tell you aren't clicking.

[Lady Pi]

The only chapters that dirty rush like that are the chapteres that are not strong enough to get PNM's playing by the rules.

[gee_ess]

Originally Posted by Lady Pi

The only chapters that dirty rush like that are the chapteres that are not strong enough to get PNM's playing by the rules.

I totally disagree with this. On competitive campuses, strong chapters can be just as guilty of this.

[beeish]

I am sure this has been covered. But I am still a little confused, how do you let a sorority know you are really interested in them?

[gee_ess]

You show a chapter you are interested by acting interested in what they have to say. Respond with interest. When they ask you a question, answer it and ask a follow up question of your own.
Tell them "Thanks for inviting me, I have had such a nice time. I really enjoyed talking with you. I liked the skit. etc"
You show a sorority you are interested just like you show a friend or a date, by reciprocating the level of interest they are showing you and sounding genuine in your responses.

[BELLAVDG]

question... im rushing this year and i know death isnt a good topic to bring up but zta's philanthropy is breast cancer awareness and my mother passed away from it, so im very enthused with there philanthropy. would it be just awful of me to say or bring this up to them during recruitment?

[Alumiyum]

Originally Posted by BELLAVDG

question... im rushing this year and i know death isnt a good topic to bring up but zta's philanthropy is breast cancer awareness and my mother passed away from it, so im very enthused with there philanthropy. would it be just awful of me to say or bring this up to them during recruitment?

I would say something like, "I've had someone close to me be diagnosed with breast cancer so I'm passionate about your philanthropy". If they ask more specific questions, you could elaborate. This is just because people often have a hard time knowing how to respond to someone's loss, and the conversation could be become very difficult for both of you if the active doesn't know what to say.

I'm so sorry for your loss.

[BELLAVDG]

thank you so much for the advice, and i couldnt agree more, there is always an akward silence after something like that has been said.

thank you for your condolences.

[Preston327]

This has all probably been repeated, but I don't think another repetition could hurt and its stuff I've seen happening that I know from my own experiences (I was a Spring initiate after an unsuccessful Fall) won't do you any favors. The following is just my opinions so by no means should it be taken as gospel truth.

1. Don't ask us when we're giving bids out. That's for us to worry about, and it kind of makes you come off as though you expect one. Just have fun and enjoy the atmosphere, if you're someone we like you'll know it soon enough.

2. If someone asks you who else you're considering, answer truthfully. It isn't a trick or a test, and we won't be offended if you say that you're trying to get a taste of everything. In fact I'd probably respect someone more for admitting as much.

3. Don't ask about or bring up the topic of drinking right off the bat. We are not Delta Tau Chi. Yes, we have functions. Yes, some of these involve alcohol. No, we do not condone or encourage acting like a drunken retard. This one especially makes me want to ram my head into a wall repeatedly.

4. At events, don't spend all your time hovering around the actives. We want to see how you interact with us and with your potential future pledge brothers.

5. If a girl is at a rush event its a good bet she's an active's girlfriend, an active's interest or a sweetheart. Please don't try to hook up with them. It makes you look like an idiot.

6. Don't trash other orgs to us. We all talk, a lot of us have friends in the org you just trashed. No bueno.

7. When you come to our house don't ask me where to buy weed. Had a PNM do this a few days ago, I told him he was in the wrong place and walked away. Seriously? Use your brain.

8. Don't repeat rumors about us/other orgs to us. We've all heard them, 99.9% of them are crap and the other .1% are grossly exaggerated facts.

Thank you, and have a successful recruitment period

ETA: Just realized this was in Sorority Recruitment. Oh well, my points still stand.

[SWTXBelle]

Originally Posted by Preston327

This has all probably been repeated, but I don't think another repetition could hurt and its stuff I've seen happening that I know from my own experiences (I was a Spring initiate after an unsuccessful Fall) won't do you any favors. The following is just my opinions so by no means should it be taken as gospel truth.

1. Don't ask us when we're giving bids out. That's for us to worry about, and it kind of makes you come off as though you expect one. Just have fun and enjoy the atmosphere, if you're someone we like you'll know it soon enough.

2. If someone asks you who else you're considering, answer truthfully. It isn't a trick or a test, and we won't be offended if you say that you're trying to get a taste of everything. In fact I'd probably respect someone more for admitting as much.

3. Don't ask about or bring up the topic of drinking right off the bat. We are not Delta Tau Chi. Yes, we have functions. Yes, some of these involve alcohol. No, we do not condone or encourage acting like a drunken retard. This one especially makes me want to ram my head into a wall repeatedly.

4. At events, don't spend all your time hovering around the actives. We want to see how you interact with us and with your potential future pledge brothers.

5. If a girl is at a rush event its a good bet she's an active's girlfriend, an active's interest or a sweetheart. Please don't try to hook up with them. It makes you look like an idiot.

6. Don't trash other orgs to us. We all talk, a lot of us have friends in the org you just trashed. No bueno.

7. When you come to our house don't ask me where to buy weed. Had a PNM do this a few days ago, I told him he was in the wrong place and walked away. Seriously? Use your brain.

8. Don't repeat rumors about us/other orgs to us. We've all heard them, 99.9% of them are crap and the other .1% are grossly exaggerated facts.

Thank you, and have a successful recruitment period

ETA: Just realized this was in Sorority Recruitment. Oh well, my points still stand.

Preston - no worries. It's a great post - Maybe title it "Fraternity what not to say" or post it in fraternity rush.

[Gusteau]

Originally Posted by ThetaPrincess24

Watch your language!!! The "F" word should not come out of your mouth at all while talking to sorority members at recruitment parties much less multiple times!!!

Clutching of pearls in 3...2...1...

Originally Posted by Preston327

1. Don't ask us when we're giving bids out. That's for us to worry about, and it kind of makes you come off as though you expect one. Just have fun and enjoy the atmosphere, if you're someone we like you'll know it soon enough.

This, additionally, don't ask how many guys we're planning on taking. The answer to that question is "enough."

[cali_gossip]

Originally Posted by Gusteau

Clutching of pearls in 3...2...1...

LOL!

[MUSK81]

Good advice, regardless of where it's posted!

[ThetaPrincess24]

Watch your language!!! The "F" word should not come out of your mouth at all while talking to sorority members at recruitment parties much less multiple times!!!