New pnm who needs advice please!!!

[pnm384731]

Hi all
I am a PNM who will be participating in formal recruitment this January. I am extremely anxious and nervous about the process and I was wondering if someone could help with a question I have.

I go to a large state school (I am in state). My problem is that throughout the first semester, I do not feel like I have made that many connections with sorority girls. I know a couple of older girls from my high school since I am in state, and my roommate has a sister who is in a sorority here who I have become friends with. Other than that, I have not really made friendships with any sorority girls. I am really worried that this will be a big disadvantage to me. What do you guys think?

Thank you.

[FSUZeta]

Why worry about something that is now out of your control? The semester is almost over. Concentrate on getting good scores on your finals. Continue to cultivate the friendships you have made. Recs might get you on the radar. Do you have them for each chapter on your campus?

[Titchou]

Make sure you have recs for all the chapters. And the sororities have had you on their radar since you signed up for recruitment. Just keep on being your best self!

[BBH]

Your going through recruitment is basically one month. At this point, I would focus more on your conversational skills. Take winter break and practice what you want to say, topics you anticipate being asked. Practice with a friend, etc. Most people underestimate the importance of conversation and making a good first impression.

You only get a short time to make an impression and typically, you only meet a few girls at each chapter so you may not even talk to the ones you know. Be yourself and be genuine but that doesn't mean you have to wing it. There is something to be said about practicing your interviewing and small talk skills. Besides, you'll need them forever. I'm 49 and an introvert and I practice small talk before I go to events to this day. Its a skill I have to work at since it doesn't come natural to me.

[honeychile]

Not having made a lot of sorority friends can sometimes be to your advantage, you will be going in with a clean slate.

Big Trouble is when you've made a distinctly BAD impression on sorority (and/or fraternity) members, ie: being the party girl or such.

[chi-o_cat]

Originally Posted by honeychile

Not having made a lot of sorority friends can sometimes be to your advantage, you will be going in with a clean slate.

That’s also better than making friends in sororities, but then overestimating how much it will actually help you when recruitment comes around. Like “I’ve been hanging out with Alpha Ashley in Psych class, so I can definitely get a bid from her chapter.” Maybe so, maybe not.

[AnchorAlumna]

I wouldn't worry about it. Probably most of the PNMs don't know that many actives.
Yes, I'd concentrate more on your conversational skills and talking with strangers.
Best of luck!