Indiana University Recruitment 2019

[KSUViolet06]

Big reminders:

The people make a chapter.

The people.

Look around at your pref party at which other PNMs are in the room.

Consider that this is going to be your class. Do you like them?

(Yeah I know that classes aren't everything but at schools like IU, your class lives in together, does things together, etc. It matters if you think those people are annoying.)

[KSUViolet06]

Also consider the best friend you ever had.

Was she instantly your BFF? Probably not.

Same with your sorority, you and everybody in your chapter are not going to be BFFs the minute you sign that bid.

I have a sister who is my BFF to this day (13 years after college.) Like, so close I visited her in the hospital when she had her daughter.

I MET my sister BFF after my first event but we did not really become SUPER CLOSE TIL we were roommates 2 years later.

Another sister I'm super close with is actually in my Little Sis's class. I did not even meet her until I was just about to graduate.

Everything good takes time. Don't balk if you don't see sparks on your Bid Day.

[*winter*]

Amen KSU! Relationships take time...even in sororities. Everyone sees girls hugging and squealing on bid day, but that's just the beginning. Friendships form when you're studying together, doing service work in the rain, bonding over TV marathons, discussing formal dates and swapping dresses...this isn't instantaneous. Especially in such big chapters! My sorority was tiny and it still took me a while to meet people and really make friends. Don't give up the opportunity to participate in something that has the potential to change your life for a bad reason or for one bad day. Think about this as a lifetime investment, because it is! I'm still close with many of my sisters from almost 20 years ago.

[clayton117]

KSUViolet- Love what you said there! I hope my D can find that in her choice. Hoping all the girls can realize that the tier thing at IU is just a bunch of noise and finding a sisterhood is really what it is all about.

My D says she feels like she needs another winter break, or at least a soak in a hot bath. But homework calls...

[MichiganM]

Originally Posted by KSUViolet06

Also consider the best friend you ever had.

Was she instantly your BFF? Probably not.

Same with your sorority, you and everybody in your chapter are not going to be BFFs the minute you sign that bid.

I have a sister who is my BFF to this day (13 years after college.) Like, so close I visited her in the hospital when she had her daughter.

I MET my sister BFF after my first event but we did not really become SUPER CLOSE TIL we were roommates 2 years later.

Another sister I'm super close with is actually in my Little Sis's class. I did not even meet her until I was just about to graduate.

Everything good takes time. Don't balk if you don't see sparks on your Bid Day.

I wish every PNM could read this ❤️ Thanks for sharing KSUViolet, and *winter* My daughter is just one year in, but I feel these same branches beginning to grow.

[Abm91]

I wish all our daughters happiness in what house they get back...ours had an Orgo test this morning so this weekend was both exciting and devastating, emotional rollercoaster ride and lots of introspection needed to get through. I hope it all works out. It is so hard to hear them cry, and my girl is a tough broad so that is how emotional it is! The bruised feelings from being romanced then dropped at the end is hard but builds resilience!!

[clayton117]

I have to say, this IU recruitment isn't a walk in the park. Friends who have kids in smaller schools with less competitive Greek systems have no idea what is going on at schools like Indiana. I have been asked time and again what sorority my daughter is rushing...like she holds the cards I can't even imagine how much more it is amped up in the Southern schools. My husband attended another Big 10 school and was in a fraternity, and he is astonished by the differences, not to mention how different it is from frat rush in general.

I think it has taught the girls a lot of lessons along the way, and has forced them out of their comfort zones: to dig deep, to find strength and confidence and resilience. I told my D this morning how proud I am of her for keeping a cool head and an open mind, and for practicing some analytical thinking, as well as listening to her gut instincts. Whether the girls find a chapter to call home or decide this Greek life isn't for them, I think they all learned something about themselves in the process.

And yes, I have gathered they are to get a bid if they maximized their options along the way, but there always seems to be a story about someone that it didn't work out for...that usually ends up being someone who didn't want the choices they were left with at the end though? My daughter is getting the impression there are a lot of girls "suiciding" this year, against the recommendations of their RGs. Hopefully it works out for those girls, or there will be more of those stories of the bid-less this cycle.

[granipc]

" I have been asked time and again what sorority my daughter is rushing...like she holds the cards"

This always cracks me up! I often wonder if the people who ask that question either weren't involved in Greek life so really have no clue, or attended a school with fewer than 4 sororities... because really, how is this even a question???

[clayton117]

SWTXBelle~That was a great thread. Perfect timing to read those stories. Thanks for sharing!

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by granipc

" I have been asked time and again what sorority my daughter is rushing...like she holds the cards"

This always cracks me up! I often wonder if the people who ask that question either weren't involved in Greek life so really have no clue, or attended a school with fewer than 4 sororities... because really, how is this even a question???

Recruitment is billed as A MUTUAL SELECTION PROCESS.

It's not, really.

THE MATCHING PROCESS AT PREF IS MORE MUTUAL, but leading up to that, the balance of power tips sharply in the direction of the chapters. NOT THE PNMs.

[GreekOne]

Originally Posted by granipc

" I have been asked time and again what sorority my daughter is rushing...like she holds the cards"

This always cracks me up! I often wonder if the people who ask that question either weren't involved in Greek life so really have no clue, or attended a school with fewer than 4 sororities... because really, how is this even a question???

LOL! Yes, people with good intentions ask some of the silliest questions. This is a good one. Not to digress, but I am a mother of fraternal twins who happen to both be girls. I had a neighbor that had fraternal boy/girl twins. One of my favorite questions, along these lines, was when people asked her how she knew her twins weren't identical. We would just look at each other and howl!

[lyrespearls]

Not trying to take anything away from tonight's festivities, but this article came out today in the Indiana Daily Student. Dramatic timing by IDS.

https://www.idsnews.com/article/2019...identity-at-iu

From the article: "The board supports the original purpose of greek life to provide social connection, but sororities and fraternities have largely lost their identity on IU’s campus. Social fraternities and sororities are not inherently bad, but greek culture has developed into something very dangerous."

This is what makes me so sad. So much of what I valued and continue to value from my active days (way back in the day!) is being overshadowed - sisterhood, true friendship, philanthropic spirit, legacy - by the party component which we all know is a a fleeting bond at best.

The Greek system, not just at IU, is in need of a major PR campaign among other things. I am hopeful that things can change and try to keep my daughter at IU focused on what's important. I don't envy the National GLO's to-do lists!

[OldFLDDD]

Originally Posted by granipc

" I have been asked time and again what sorority my daughter is rushing...like she holds the cards"

This always cracks me up! I often wonder if the people who ask that question either weren't involved in Greek life so really have no clue, or attended a school with fewer than 4 sororities... because really, how is this even a question???

I had a neighbor's daughter ask me for a rec a few years back--saying "Can I get a rec from you? I want to rush Tri Delt as a legacy!" Um, not really how that works, sweetie...she got the rec, but I had to explain some things!

[Abm91]

I have a question for those experts on the new system...If our daughter ranked Sorority A first, then Sorority B second...and she is not high enough on the list of A to get a bid - I understand they look at sorority B’s list and if she is not high enough on their list she doesn’t get a bid. She is then open for QA but what does that mean? Do they go back to Sorority A and see where she was on list and see if they can take another girl? Or do they go back to any house that is offering QA and it could be one she ranked higher but didn’t get asked back to Pref night? Sorry I am just trying to figure out how this may turn out for her...Thank you all for the advice!

[Titchou]

Originally Posted by Abm91

I have a question for those experts on the new system...If our daughter ranked Sorority A first, then Sorority B second...and she is not high enough on the list of A to get a bid - I understand they look at sorority B’s list and if she is not high enough on their list she doesn’t get a bid. She is then open for QA but what does that mean? Do they go back to Sorority A and see where she was on list and see if they can take another girl? Or do they go back to any house that is offering QA and it could be one she ranked higher but didn’t get asked back to Pref night? Sorry I am just trying to figure out how this may turn out for her...Thank you all for the advice!

It's a computer program and a litttle more complicated than that. They will run the names for Group A until the women match elsewhere or A fills up. Once all groups are filled or all matches have gone as far as they can go, then they do QAs. QAs are typically matched to the smallest of the groups they listed but she would be placed with one of those two if at all possible. Snap bids can given to women who do not place and some other group lists them on their list...hope this helps.