Should she rush again?

[Pamt]

My daughter did not receive a bid during this past rush. We determined (guessed ) that her visiting a Frat house, during rush week to visit some friends ( a poor decision) and the past year, may have given the wrong impression as innocent as it may have been. She has a great GPA, is outgoing, all the "usual" things they look for as does just about everyone else. If the reason was this, or even if it was one we will never know, is it worth it for her to rush again in the Spring? She is currently a sophomore.

[AZTheta]

Are you asking if she should rush in the hopes that she'll get a bid from a particular chapter? Or is she willing to accept a bid from any chapter that is willing to extend one?

[Pamt]

Originally Posted by AZTheta

Are you asking if she should rush in the hopes that she'll get a bid from a particular chapter? Or is she willing to accept a bid from any chapter that is willing to extend one?

She will accept any bid. This is at a south Florida school.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by Pamt

My daughter did not receive a bid during this past rush. We determined (guessed ) that her visiting a Frat house, during rush week to visit some friends ( a poor decision) and the past year, may have given the wrong impression as innocent as it may have been. She has a great GPA, is outgoing, all the "usual" things they look for as does just about everyone else. If the reason was this, or even if it was one we will never know, is it worth it for her to rush again in the Spring? She is currently a sophomore.

The only way she can get a bid is to rush again. We can't tell you, though, if she could handle another round of rejection if it doesn't work out.

[DubaiSis]

She needs to start working right now at repairing/building relationships with sorority women. Re-rushing is the LAST step in this process.

[33girl]

Didn't you say she had other groups she was going to get involved with? Let her see how that goes. Sorority membership is not everyone's cup of tea.

[Pamt]

She is involved with the Pre-Law coed fraternity which she loves and has a "position" in it this year. Whatever she decides, she is involved in other activities.

[Katmandu]

It really depends on the culture of the school as to the viability of second semester sophs during COB. My question would not be, "should I rush again?", but rather, "what did I learn from this?" If the answer is "none of this is on me, it's everyone else", then re-rushing is moot.

I agree, making connections, making friendships is primary here. She went to the frat house during recruitment for a reason, against your own good and measured advice. What that means, and why, are fodder for reflection.

[BlueCarnation]

As someone posted in your other thread, I know as a mom you want to think the best about your daughter, but you're not there with her every day, and don't know what she's doing 24/7. It's possible some of the things she's done aren't so "innocent." If she really had wanted to be in a sorority so badly she would've listened to your sound advice. One night at a fraternity house isn't what caused her not to get a bid. It just isn't.

Has she said why she wants to be in a sorority? I would encourage her to think about what she hopes to get out of it and go from there.

[amIblue?]

I don't mean this exactly in the way that it's going to come across in text, but every time I see the title of this thread, here's what I think: "Don't know; don't care."

This is something your daughter is going to have to figure out for herself. If there's a reputation issue, she's going to have to consider if that's something that she is interested in correcting and make the on campus connections that will help her to get a bid. She certainly won't ever get a bid if she stops trying, but she's going to have to be honest with herself and figure out what she wants, what's keeping her from getting it (I agree with BlueCarnation that one night visiting a platonic friend at a fraternity house is not the entirety of the problem), and then asking advice for herself on how to fix it.

[LAblondeGPhi]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

She needs to start working right now at repairing/building relationships with sorority women. Re-rushing is the LAST step in this process.

Totally agree.

Pamt - you have yet to make any mention whatsoever about sorority women with whom your daughter is friends, so that makes me think that she's not friends with many.

If she's to have a successful sorority recruitment, she desperately needs strong allies within those chapters who fight for her. That is literally the only change I can see that would make any difference for her if she chooses to go through recruitment again.

[Pamt]

Originally Posted by LAblondeGPhi

Totally agree.

Pamt - you have yet to make any mention whatsoever about sorority women with whom your daughter is friends, so that makes me think that she's not friends with many.

If she's to have a successful sorority recruitment, she desperately needs strong allies within those chapters who fight for her. That is literally the only change I can see that would make any difference for her if she chooses to go through recruitment again.

She's friendly with the sorority girls in her classes but her friends with one exception are not greek.

[adpiucf]

Recruitment at schools like U Miami, FAU, FIU, etc., are not as crazy competitive as their neighbors to the north. This will blow over. Tell her to get good grades, stay involved on campus, and keep a positive profile. The only way to know is to try again. Good luck.

[FSUZeta]

I believe she attends U of Florida.