A Parent's Breakfast

[beannes]

Hi. I'm trying to organize a parent's breakfast before our big philanthropy event. However, everywhere on campus, around campus, campus affiliated is booked, and I'm in the boiling pot right now. I have literally tried everywhere, and hotels and other places are kind of a no-go because of the catering rules and costs to rent them out. Which leads me to ask for an opinion. What do you think of a parent's breakfast picnic? If we had the breakfast at school, we would have to travel to the neighborhood park to get to the event and struggle with parking. If we had it at the event site however, the closest parking spots would be open for sisters and parents, no worries about getting lost trying to find the place... Most parents bring their own foldable chairs anyway, so they could bring those or a blanket. There is also a set of bleachers or two they could sit on. Would this be a good idea? It should be warm as it's near the end of April, and I would be able to call it off if the weather proves to be rainy. It would have muffins, fruit, casseroles, pastries, orange juice, and whatever else I could buy in the budget that would taste good.

Also, regardless of where we hold the breakfast, would this be fair? I think so. My family is local, so we would be buying all the food and cooking it, setting up, and taking the leftovers to a homeless shelter. Because of all this, I wanted to make it so that only you and your parents, unless otherwise noted on the sign up list, are expected to come, please no boyfriends or friends. If you'd like a sibling to come, please have it written on the list so I can adjust accordingly. Like with socials, I wanted to make it so that if your name is on the list you are coming. If you don't show up you will be fined, because that's a lot of work and money gone because it's not fair to me nor my family to spend a whole day cooking. I don't want to come off as mean to anyone.

[AlphaFrog]

Where has this been held in the past? Are the participants expecting a 5 Star Restaurant meal?

Are you the parent or the sorority member?

If you are the sorority member, what is your position? Do you have authority to impose fines and such?

If you are the parent, how did you come to be in charge of this event? Are you REALLY in charge, or did you volunteer yourself to take all of this over?

ETA: In the past, have boyfriends/friends been invited?

[wavycutchip]

I'm glad to hear you are taking on some leadership in your chapter! I think your next conversation should be with your council/executive board member that your office works with. She would be able to answer your questions, as well as discuss if the location, food, guest limitations, and attendance requirements are allowed or appropriate for your chapter. Good luck with your event! Let us know how it goes!

[adpiucf]

No. This is not a good idea. In fact, it is a terrible idea. You are basically using a lawn with no seating and no shade, and this is a horrible impression to make on parents. If you're going to do this, you must rent a table, chairs, and fans.

If you want to have a picnic, try it out as a sisterhood event first and see how it goes. You have limited opportunities to make an impression on the parents of your members.

This event should be paid out of chapter dues, a donation to the sorority, or as a ticketed event. It's great that you want to take on the responsibility of cooking and then donating the leftovers, but you have chosen that responsibility. Attendance and morale will suffer if people are being threatened from the outset that they will be punished. Don't put in the effort if you don't want no shows. People will not show up for a variety of reasons to any event-- even weddings. If your family's offer to do this comes with strings attached, then back out now.

This is a band-aid solution that fails to take into account that people are coming from out of town, that some parents or siblings may have mobility issues that makes hanging out in a park difficult (is the area wheelchair accessible, for example?). You do not have adequate seating, and "bring your own chairs and tables" is a huge turnoff for people traveling from out of town. How will you timely and effectively notify everyone if you have to call it off due to weather? There are too many variables with an outdoor event.

Why not have a reception at your chapter house or at the home of a local member's family? You can host an open house where people come and go over a period of a few hours.

Do not have this picnic. It has disaster written all over it. You need to find a facility or rent a tent for the park.

I applaud you for stepping up with a creative solution in the face of a challenging situation, and your family's wonderful generosity. Keep brainstorming, and the right option will click. Talk to your chapter. Maybe form a committee to brainstorm feasible alternatives. Talk to your advisers. And then vote as a chapter so that whatever you decide, the majority are on board and attendance will be successful.

[AZTheta]

Here's something else for you to think about. When handling food, you need to be very very careful that you are doing everything just right. Or people are gonna get sick. You wrote "casseroles" in your food list, and those need to be kept hot.

As for fining for non-attendance, best check your bylaws on whether that's permitted. In many chapters, you can't just fine people unless it's spelled out.

Do you have a facility? I think there must be a back story here that I didn't see? Because if you do, you could simply serve a continental breakfast (pastries, juices, coffee) at your facility. Short and sweet. No elaborate cooking, expense, set-up, etc.

I have some other things to say but I don't llke to speculate and I don't have enough information to say anything else at this point (like, I have some ideas that might work for you depending on what you respond).

Honestly, I'd rethink this and keep in mind that the focus should be on the philanthropy.

[MaggieXi]

Insted of doing this now, why don't you wait until Parent's Weekend and do it then? It gives you ample time to find a location (start looking now). You can request donations, if the parents would like to make them, or do a raffle or something to benefit the Philanthropy.

[LouisaMay]

My sister and I hosted an outdoor brunch for my parents' 30th anniversary. The key was a pavilion with tables. Even though the weather was gorgeous, I can't imagine not having at least a little shelter and seating. Our brunch ended up being beautiful with simple flower arrangments and a lovely view. We aimed for the look of an outdoor wedding, so even though it was a "picnic" it felt sort of fancy.

Heated buffet-style serving trays (the kind with the little propane flames beneath them) were very inexpensive from a party store. I take food safety extremely seriously, and having the heated trays gave me peace of mind. We sat cold things (like fruit salad) in beds of ice.

Good luck. Try not to feel rushed or it will be a chore rather than a joy to prepare. If you have an option to move the date in order to have more time, do it!

[beannes]

I am parent and alumnae relations chair, so I really AM in charge of this. We don't have a house, my school's city doesn't allow housing for large groups or men or women, so that is out of the question. The event is an outdoor event, literally a giant tug of war. Parents are coming to this. I already sent out a sign up sheet, and have about 60% of the girls wanting their parents to come. Formerly, it was held in the university center, with just eggs and bacon and orange juice to eat. When I buy the food, I will be reimbursed for everything, as once my budget is approved, I buy the food then get the money back from the chapter's dues. We don't have a parent's weekend, this is the parent's weekend, and every single place on campus is unavailable. And I'm being treated like I can't handle it properly, but that's completely out of my control if everywhere is booked. Last year at the event, there was a breakfast the morning of for strictly parents, some siblings came also. Then everyone went to the fields and either stood, sat, or brought a chair. Every person at the breakfast went to the event. And I would be able to impose a fine on those who don't show up once they have signed the list. It's like with a social, if you sign up and don't show that reflects poorly on the chapter and you will be fined. The same thing would be happening here. It's not a strings attached thing, it's a normal thing to happen in any sorority

[Titchou]

I think your plans sound fine. Just make it close enough to the start time of the event that they don't sit around bored but no so close as to have outside folks expect to eat also.

[beannes]

yeah, the event starts at 12, i was going to make it 10-1130. but luckily a center opened up right by campus so im good now!

[AZTheta]

That's great news! And I'm sure you're very relieved.

I bet you'll tell the next person who takes your office to book something far in advance, huh?

[Psi U MC Vito]

Also something that might not have occurred to you, but sometimes fraternal organizations like the Masons are willing to rent out locations. My lodge does occasionally.

[Titchou]

Good deal!

[SydneyK]

Originally Posted by beannes

yeah, the event starts at 12, i was going to make it 10-1130. but luckily a center opened up right by campus so im good now!

Wait. The event - the breakfast - starts at noon?

[Gamma Xi Phi]

Originally Posted by Psi U MC Vito

Also something that might not have occurred to you, but sometimes fraternal organizations like the Masons are willing to rent out locations. My lodge does occasionally.

Because of good relationships I've had with Freemasons over the years, I frequently try to ask them first. Problem is, many lodges don't have websites with current contact information. But once you establish a great relationship with a lodge, you can have a partnership for life.