advise for daughter who resigned after 3rd round

[agzg]

Originally Posted by MOMto2

dsh - I applaud you for coming here to get information. Check your private messages for information about Auburn COB. God knows I wouldn't post here with all these sharks!

A simple "check your PMs" without the passive aggressive remark would have sufficed, thanks.

[ree-Xi]

Originally Posted by MOMto2

dsh - I applaud you for coming here to get information. Check your private messages for information about Auburn COB. God knows I wouldn't post here with all these sharks!

Just wondering, why aren't the daughters the ones coming here?

Originally Posted by Daddy Fratstar

I know this is cold comfort, but I am being told by some fairly sophisticated observers (i.e., upperclass AU fraternity men), that this year's PNM pool and pledge classes are deeper and stronger than in anyone's memory.

"They" say that every year.

[katydidKD]

Originally Posted by ree-Xi

Just wondering, why aren't the daughters the ones coming here?

Because mommy has to fix it for her little snowflake princess who hasn't ever been denied of what she wanted

[Titchou]

[QUOTE=ree-Xi;2082174]Just wondering, why aren't the daughters the ones coming here?]

Because she's too embarrassed or thwap, thwap mom is more upset than Susie Snowflake....

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by ree-Xi

Just wondering, why aren't the daughters the ones coming here?

Maybe the same reason that we have so many people telling their daughters' (or cousins' or whoevers') recruitment stories. I just really don't get that.

[HQWest]

Wait a minute

- are you being snarky about her being snarky about people being snarky?

Lighten up, folks! We're supposed to be having fun!

[KSUViolet06]

I'm going to be as honest as possible here.

The groups participating in COB are likely going to include some of the groups she "didn't feel comfortable in" and very few (if any) of those that she liked better.

BEFORE signing up, she should ask herself:

"Is it more important to me to be in one of the certain sororities I liked best?"

Or

"Is it most important to me to be part of the amazing Auburn Greek community?"

Either you want to be Greek, or you only want to be in certain groups. She is certainly entitled to either choice, but that's the choice you have to make with COB especially at a more competitive school.

Good luck to her with whatever she decides.

[AZTheta]

OP, we do not have all the facts of your daughter's recruitment experiences.

It is a fact that we do not discuss membership selection on Greek Chat. Knowing that fact should tell you that the answers for what happened are private and will not be divulged outside the confines of each Auburn sorority's walls.

It's really impossible for us to offer you any words of advice other than this: have your daughter follow up with the Auburn Greek Life Office regarding opportunities for informal recruitment, or COR.

Personally, I believe that everything happens for a purpose and that ultimately that purpose is for good. This is difficult to internalize when one is suffering or in pain, however, it's a lesson that took with me and has kept me sane through all the insane times.

[katydidKD]

[QUOTE=hmills2;2081418]My name is Helen and my daughter did not get a bid at Auburn. She is crushed as am I./QUOTE]

Originally Posted by hmills2

My daughter went through rush at Auburn this year and it did not go well.

She is a cute girl with a lot of friends and from out of state. By the last day she had two choices left and she disliked both of them so she decided to withdraw rather than getting a bid from one she did not want to join or getting shut out completely.

It was very hard on her. Part of her vision of college is being in a sorority and she is very much the "sorority type". All of hers and our friends are very suprised that she did not get into a sorority. Even worse, every one of her close friends got in a good sorority as did all the girls from her HS. It has really been a bad week for her.

Classes began yesterday and she is doing a good job of looking forward and anticipating other activities/organizations. She has already applied to an organization and it would be great for her if she gets into it. The oncoming stress of classes will distract her from thinking about it, too.

In the meantime she has registered her name for COB and is doing her best to get the word out that she is interested. The chances are slim, but it's the best option right now. As time goes on the shock and disappointment of fall rush will lessen and she will be ok and hopefully she might get a bid someday.

We already responded to this poster. Your daughter ruined her chances when she was too good for two sororities.

[Daddy Fratstar]

I know this is cold comfort, but I am being told by some fairly sophisticated observers (i.e., upperclass AU fraternity men), that this year's PNM pool and pledge classes are deeper and stronger than in anyone's memory.

[als463]

Here's the first bit of advice: Learn the difference between "advice" and "advise" if you are going to start a thread. Here's some more advice, if your daughter thought she was too good for the sororities that didn't make her feel "comfortable" or "make her heart sing" (I will NEVER get over that ridiculous excuse--in case anyone has noticed), then she did the various organizations at Auburn a service when she chose to drop. Auburn is full of incredibly intelligent and beautiful girls with very impressive resumes/ grades. I'm willing to bet that the "lesser" or "lower-tiered" sororities have INCREDIBLE ladies in their chapters that your unique snowflake thought she was too good for.

[Titchou]

Keep in mind that the ones she didn't want WANTED HER. And now that she's tossed them in the weeds, they will possibly not be inclined to give her another chance. And they are most likely her only options for COB....

[DubaiSis]

There was no chapter at AU who was inviting every girl in desperation to get SOMEBODY. If she was on a list it was with intention.

I'd love to see a system where the chapters are advised that these girls have been cut completely. Can you reconsider inviting them again? If she wasn't actually cut, but just not high enough on the list, maybe a chapter or two would make an exception. Of course this would have to be done without the knowledge of the rushee, and maybe would open an ugly can of worms, but maybe it would keep a handful of hearts from being broken. I can see a chapter inviting back 5 more girls, spread out over all of their parties, and nobody knows the difference. What would be interesting to see is if that girl, cut completely, might suddenly have a full schedule because everyone from her previous days says, sure, we'd love to have her again.
Am I being ridiculous? (I mean about this particular topic. I know I'm ridiculous otherwise)

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

There was no chapter at AU who was inviting every girl in desperation to get SOMEBODY. If she was on a list it was with intention.

I'd love to see a system where the chapters are advised that these girls have been cut completely. Can you reconsider inviting them again? If she wasn't actually cut, but just not high enough on the list, maybe a chapter or two would make an exception. Of course this would have to be done without the knowledge of the rushee, and maybe would open an ugly can of worms, but maybe it would keep a handful of hearts from being broken. I can see a chapter inviting back 5 more girls, spread out over all of their parties, and nobody knows the difference. What would be interesting to see is if that girl, cut completely, might suddenly have a full schedule because everyone from her previous days says, sure, we'd love to have her again.
Am I being ridiculous? (I mean about this particular topic. I know I'm ridiculous otherwise)

I think you should start a separate thread on this. It's also weird to me to think that there are systems where NO chapter is eligible to COB, ever.

[katydidKD]

Originally Posted by DubaiSis

I'd love to see a system where the chapters are advised that these girls have been cut completely. Can you reconsider inviting them again? If she wasn't actually cut, but just not high enough on the list, maybe a chapter or two would make an exception. Of course this would have to be done without the knowledge of the rushee, and maybe would open an ugly can of worms, but maybe it would keep a handful of hearts from being broken. I can see a chapter inviting back 5 more girls, spread out over all of their parties, and nobody knows the difference. What would be interesting to see is if that girl, cut completely, might suddenly have a full schedule because everyone from her previous days says, sure, we'd love to have her again.
Am I being ridiculous? (I mean about this particular topic. I know I'm ridiculous otherwise)

No you are not being ridiculous, Panhellenic at my school did this, I was actually surprised it isn't common at other schools.