Rudest PNM You Had to Deal With

[AGDee]

I guess we were lucky back in my day because women pretty much accepted only invitations that they wanted and there were no consequences to that. Then again, there were only 4 chapters and quota was like 9 or 10. Women were never intentionally rude though and I don't remember any experiences like these.

[Dutchie]

While this girl wasn’t rude to our faces, she still was probably the rudest girl my sorority has had to deal with in a while. (sorry the back story is long, but my undergrad’s recruitment is set-up a little differently than most schools)
At my undergrad, recruitment events are held during the evening of the week as well as weekends. If a girl cannot make an event (because she has class, is sick, can’t get off of work, etc) but is still interested in a particular sorority, they are told to send a note to that group’s house (after the first day, girls are not required to visit all groups).
Our recruitment is semi-structured so that each group has a certain time slot and no groups overlap for the first week of recruitment (recruitment is 2 ½ weeks long). However my junior year a student passed away and the memorial service was scheduled for the same time as one of our events. Since many of my sisters were friends with the girl & wanted to be at the service, the Greek advisor moved our time slot to the same time as one of the other sororities.
That night, when it came time for voting, our recruitment chair read any notes we had received for that event. When we got to one girl’s note it read ‘Hi, I would love to be at your event tonight but it’s the same time as XY and I’d rather be at their event.’
I’m pretty sure she did not get an invite for the upcoming closed event (we alternate between open & closed events) but she showed up to the next open saying how much she has missed us. Fast forward a week and she did get a bid to the sorority she told us she rather be at. However, she did show-up our events almost to the end.

[KSUViolet06]

In a different thread, an NPHC sorority member asked why people got so worked up over rudeness. I figured I'd repost my response to that here.

I've never cried/gotten upset over a rude person.

My take on rudeness in recruitment:

If you are really rude enough to act that way toward people you just met, you'll probably be a rude brat once you get a bid and make your NM class and the chapter miserable. Your rudeness is actually helping us to weed you out and saving us your drama. So thanks for being rude!

I hold Sigma in such high esteem that I just feel like a complete brat doesn't deserve her. I'm glad that those who aren't worthy of her show themselves every year with their bratty comments.

/soapbox.

[dgdramadawg]

Once, a friend of one of our sisters happened upon an online journal of a PNM on which she posted her rankings of the houses on campus and all her thoughts on the first round. Her thoughts were negative, to say the least, about all but a select few chapters on campus.

Word got around pretty quickly as people from other chapters found out, too. The girl deleted the post, but the damage was done.

[DubaiSis]

UGAalum, I think that would fall into a reasonable question for just the reason you stated. If I met a girl who had lived in 5 states and 6 countries, I'd probably be asking why too.

One of the hardest things to get used to living in Dubai is the first question you ALWAYS get asked is where are you from, and the second is what does your husband do. It seems sooooo anti-feminist, but the fact is 99% of the women I meet are here because of their husbands' jobs. Different context makes it not offensive.

[xoxoxoxo]

We had a PNM who ended up pledging our sorority waaaaaaaaaay back when who told us that another house (known for its wealthy members) asked her during rush, "What does your daddy do for a living?" And she replied, "he brings home the bacon." And my admiration for this new pledge grew even more. There might be another thread for this. Sorry!

[JayhawkAOII]

How about a rude active? This still sticks out in my mind 22 years later. Last house of open house round, the chapter has the pnm's around the perimeter of the room and the active members of the chapter are sitting in front/next to them. I am sitting on a fireplace hearth that is slightly elevated with the active in front kneeling. I am in the middle of describing my summer, which she asked me about, when she pats me on the knee and cuts me off saying "we're going to sing now", then turned and ignored me for the rest of the party. I was like, "um, well, ok." I guess going to an Eastern Block country for the summer to study just wasn't that interesting. Sooo not disappointed when I wasn't asked back.

[DeltaBetaBaby]

Originally Posted by JayhawkAOII

How about a rude active? This still sticks out in my mind 22 years later. Last house of open house round, the chapter has the pnm's around the perimeter of the room and the active members of the chapter are sitting in front/next to them. I am sitting on a fireplace hearth that is slightly elevated with the active in front kneeling. I am in the middle of describing my summer, which she asked me about, when she pats me on the knee and cuts me off saying "we're going to sing now", then turned and ignored me for the rest of the party. I was like, "um, well, ok." I guess going to an Eastern Block country for the summer to study just wasn't that interesting. Sooo not disappointed when I wasn't asked back.

I was late to a party because I was coming from a house way on the other side of campus, and it can be tough to get from the Champaign cluster to the Urbana cluster in ten minutes. Anyway, the active who picked me up at the door was like "Sigh...I thought I was going to get a break this round", and it was all down hill from there.

[TriDeltaSallie]

Originally Posted by DeltaBetaBaby

I was late to a party because I was coming from a house way on the other side of campus, and it can be tough to get from the Champaign cluster to the Urbana cluster in ten minutes. Anyway, the active who picked me up at the door was like "Sigh...I thought I was going to get a break this round", and it was all down hill from there.

Wow.

[trisigma212]

I went to a university with a small Greek community (3 NPC sororities and 3 IFC fraternities) and where there was more mutual respect for each of the chapters on campus. We don't have houses, so we meet in classrooms on campus usually or the student centers. Despite this, almost all chapters were always at total so recruitment was just seen to boost our numbers exponentially since recruitment usually meant that each chapter was adding between 20-25 girls to our numbers.

My sophomore year during our formal Spring rush, during our opening rounds (usually dedicated to sisterhood or just a usual school spirit night) we had a girl come in and text on her phone during our party. She became known as the "texter" and the second we got to drop her, we did. For some reason, when the parties are more casual, the more likely it seems there are opportunities for bad behavior.

My junior year, we had the junior class president come through recruitment. I didn't really like the girl because she was just so in your face about everything (to the point of obnoxiousness). When I talked with her at one of the opening rounds, I discovered that she was only joining a sorority to pad her resume. I told my chapter president, who in turn texted the other chapter presidents during a break about her lofty goals. She was dropped by all three after the first round.

On my campus, because it was so small and the Greeks really stuck together, if you did something rude to one of us, we let all the other chapters know. No one appreciates rudeness, especially since so many of us were friends and even lived with members of other chapters.

[PSKsilver]

I see a lot of of rude sorority pnms, but how about a rude fraternity pnm/pledge?


We had this one guy rush for our fraternity. He was a friend of one of our brothers and was interested in rushing with us. So, he rushed, made through association, and started on his process. Thoroughout his pledging period, we began to like him less, and less, and less.


First, there was a huge age difference. Most of us are like in our twentys, with everyone in the new pledge class under twenty, except him. He was closer to thirty or something like that. Not that it is a reason to not like him, it was just that the huge age difference made things kind of akward.


However, his behavior was absolutely ridiculous. Our social chair would get messages from him whenever we would have a mixer, and always asked something like "So when are the b**ches gonna come over" or "what are we going to do with these b**ches". Incredibly rude, especially since some of the brothers we're dating some sisters in the sororities that we have been mixing with.


Next, he was married, and kept talking crap about his wife, and talked about how he would go after these younger girls in an instant. And some brothers were talking about getting to know some of these women as well.


Third, women were very uncomfortable around him. He would always talk about all the sex he would do, and he acted like an immature 18 year old, definitely not someone his age should be.


Next, our local brat sales. He helped out with them. He cooked the brats, which was great. However, he started advertising them to students. And by advertising, he'd say how "this wiener would help your butt" and how a hot dog looks good in her hands, etc. etc.


Now, as he was still a pledge, we still could have stopped him from being a complete brother. Thankfully, he decided to quit on his own. We figured out from the brother he was friends with that he was uncomfortable with some of us, me included. As much as this sounds horrible, I take great pride in being the reason this person isn't involved with us anymore. We thought we were done.


Of course not. We had one more incident with him.


Now, when he was still pledging, Greek Week was coming up, and all those that wanted shirts ordered them. They were ten dollars. He quit before the shirts came.


Now, when the shirts came, the person in charge of getting them for us emailed everyone to give him the ten dollars for the shirts. We forgot to take his name off the email list. He replied back saying that he doesn't owe anything and threatened to beat all of us up.


What a great guy, huh?

[IUHoosiergirl88]

I had plenty a rude PNM when on the active side, but I think the worst was when I was a PNM myself.

IU recruitment is notoriously competitive, and there's more tent talk than I knew was humanly possible.

First one--We had just walked out the door of a traditionally Jewish house, and at the end of the sidewalk this girl just says "so THAT'S what matzoh ball soup smells like". I was appalled!

Second one--This girl in my rho gam group once belittled everyone who didn't have a perfect list after 19 party (12 houses). She ended up accepting a bid, getting initiated, and transferring to a school without greek life after partying too much

[AXEling]

My AXS chapter gets a few people every year that come to rush events because they want the free food. Whatever, but at least they politely decline if offered a bid. This past fall rush we had someone actually tell a brother that he had no interest in our "stupid club" and he just wanted us to buy his meals a few times. I'm not quite sure he realized he was talking to a member, but it doesn't make much sense to me to use that phrasing when talking to anyone.

[jazing]

Originally Posted by AXEling

My AXS chapter gets a few people every year that come to rush events because they want the free food. Whatever, but at least they politely decline if offered a bid. This past fall rush we had someone actually tell a brother that he had no interest in our "stupid club" and he just wanted us to buy his meals a few times. I'm not quite sure he realized he was talking to a member, but it doesn't make much sense to me to use that phrasing when talking to anyone.

Can't you tell a PNM in fraternity recruitment to not come back? I'm nearly certain in sorority you do just that, but how does a fraternity do it?

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by AXEling

My AXS chapter gets a few people every year that come to rush events because they want the free food. Whatever, but at least they politely decline if offered a bid.

Why would anyone like that get offered a bid?