The Rules According to a Fraternity "Cocksman"

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Ghostwriter

There is just too much that seems out of character in this.

What do you mean by this? Do you know the alleged writer personally or are you saying it's "out of character" for a member of your organization?

I'd be the first to admit that there are some shitheads in my org, too.

[MysticCat]

Originally Posted by agzg

What do you mean by this? Do you know the alleged writer personally or are you saying it's "out of character" for a member of your organization?

I took him to mean it would seem out of character for Kappa Sig HQ to be engaging in a cover-up rather than taking action.

[SOM]

The POV of a woman blogger on this story:
USC Frat E-mail Shocks and Appalls, But I’m Just Appalled
http://collegecandy.com/2011/03/10/u...just-appalled/

[James]

It wasn't that funny. He went for crude over creative.

However, eliminating some of the crudeness, parts of this are not uncommon types of conversation, among men.

[SOM]

Originally Posted by James

It wasn't that funny. He went for crude over creative.

However, eliminating some of the crudeness, parts of this are not uncommon types of conversation, among men.

James: There are a great many ideas and thoughts that maybe common types of conversation among certain groups.

Does that make any of them correct, proper and decedent?

When I spoke, last night, to a Chapter EA he was sicken and disgusted by what he saw. And planned to have a meeting with the Men of the chapter to make it very clear that this line of thought is not condoned.

[Ghostwriter]

Well I hope and pray the originator of the email was not a Kappa Sig. If he was I "pity the fool" as our alums will insist that he be expelled from the fraternity and hound him to the gates of hell.

My suspicion is that the writer is not a Kappa Sig or a member of a fraternity at USC. If he is, he is really stupid as he will be outed for what he is. A true dumbass. We shall soon see as USC says the writer was not a student there.

[modorney]

This news video says writer was not a KΣ.

http://discussions.ktla.com/20/ktla2...rnity-email/10

[Regina.George]

No matter who wrote it, I'm surprised there are so many women who are shocked that there are plenty of guys who think and talk this way. Most of them are just careful enough not to put it in an email.

[southbymidwest]

Originally Posted by Regina.George

No matter who wrote it, I'm surprised there are so many women who are shocked that there are plenty of guys who think and talk this way. Most of them are just careful enough not to put it in an email.

Exactly.

[VandalSquirrel]

Originally Posted by Regina.George

No matter who wrote it, I'm surprised there are so many women who are shocked that there are plenty of guys who think and talk this way. Most of them are just careful enough not to put it in an email.

They still put it on t-shirts and sweatshirts though, saw one in the super market where my whole gender was termed as someone to be paid for sex. It was from a chapter I thought had better judgment than that, can't say that it didn't make me think a bit less of their current membership. The person sporting it is a current member living in house, so it wasn't a former member, alumnus, or non member wearing a cast off.

I figure if the membership as a whole decides to put it on clothing and wear it, it lets everyone know how they think and feel and we can interact (or not) accordingly.

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel

They still put it on t-shirts and sweatshirts though, saw one in the super market where my whole gender was termed as someone to be paid for sex. It was from a chapter I thought had better judgment than that, can't say that it didn't make me think a bit less of their current membership. The person sporting it is a current member living in house, so it wasn't a former member, alumnus, or non member wearing a cast off.

I figure if the membership as a whole decides to put it on clothing and wear it, it lets everyone know how they think and feel and we can interact (or not) accordingly.

The message here is that undergrads need to be conscious that their organization is a brand, and as a brand, it has a certain image. If they want to get quality members, their image needs to be such that those individuals will be attracted to the organization. If they want to get men who will disrespect women, sounds like that particular group can just keep on keepin' on.

[VandalSquirrel]

Originally Posted by Kevin

The message here is that undergrads need to be conscious that their organization is a brand, and as a brand, it has a certain image. If they want to get quality members, their image needs to be such that those individuals will be attracted to the organization. If they want to get men who will disrespect women, sounds like that particular group can just keep on keepin' on.

I will admit my own bias came into this as it really was from a fraternity where I know alumni and just wouldn't expect them to seriously make those types of clothing design. Sure there's a lot of joking and ridiculous not to be taken serious outrageous ideas that never leave the privacy of the group, but I found it even stranger since IFC decided a few years ago to not have parties or themes with women as hoes and such. I've seen clothing that allude to groups and if you're from this campus you would know who they are, but aren't outright the names and letters of an organization. Now with instant publishing with digital cameras and social media one poorly thought t-shirt design may haunt a group for a long time.

I continue to be confused by the women in sororities who play into the party themes of being prostitutes and sex objects. Why would I go to the party where it is made clear my place there is someone who is used for sex and seen not as a person, when the women who founded our organizations fought so hard for education and to be taken seriously. Maybe it is how I was raised, my personal values, or high self esteem but I managed to never attend any party with a theme that degraded women, or any other group of people who may have, or still are marginalized. I'm still waiting for an invite to 33girl's "Federal Express" party where the guys line up by package size and delivery time

I also saw this story as a headline, and immediately thought the USC further from me since the author referred to himself as a cocksman, and the University of South Carolina mascot is the Gamecock. There's also a Kappa Sigma chapter there. Maybe he was also perping crew, and meant coxswain?

[Kevin]

Originally Posted by VandalSquirrel

I continue to be confused by the women in sororities who play into the party themes of being prostitutes and sex objects. Why would I go to the party where it is made clear my place there is someone who is used for sex and seen not as a person, when the women who founded our organizations fought so hard for education and to be taken seriously.

No comment on your organization's ideals, those may ultimately be incompatible with what I'm about to say, but I'm not sure that these women who do attend these parties and play into these themes are necessarily anti-feminist. Heck--they're exhibiting a lack of sexual inhibition, freedom and power, if nothing else. Or at least that's one possible interpretation. And of course, many of the women attending these events, in many cases, will be GDI, so the founders' values concept really doesn't apply.

Maybe it is how I was raised, my personal values, or high self esteem but I managed to never attend any party with a theme that degraded women, or any other group of people who may have, or still are marginalized. I'm still waiting for an invite to 33girl's "Federal Express" party where the guys line up by package size and delivery time

Maybe you're placing too much emphasis on the theme and too little on how people behave? The later is just as important as the former.

[agzg]

Originally Posted by Regina.George

No matter who wrote it, I'm surprised there are so many women who are shocked that there are plenty of guys who think and talk this way. Most of them are just careful enough not to put it in an email.

I'm not shocked. I'm just aware that there's something wrong with them, not with me, for their thinking.

[Lafayette79]

We didn't have the concept of Pimps and Hoes when I was an active, but this just seems to me to be an excuse to dress up and have some fun. Albeit, in a tasteless and stupid format.

I think that the idea of 'Comfy' is important here. When you share hours and days with people doing things like tying crepe paper to chicken wire and getting those awful cuts, then they become very human to you and the organizations tend to grow closer together, (which is the whole point, of course). I think that these types of groups can have fun at this kind of party, which would be inappropriate or even dangerous in other circumstances.

Recently, I was looking through some old albums and found two parties that we had years ago. One was a Roaring '20's theme, much like the KT/ZBT party on Greek. The girls dressed like flappers which meant short dresses and too much makeup. The other was a Pajama Party where some of the women wore baby dolls and some wore flannel. They felt at ease dressing like this in our house because they trusted us, so we all had a great time and got some good memories. They were Comfy with us.