Barbie’s Honest to God Authentic Retro Recruitment at a Very Competitive SEC School

[Little32]

Y'all scared Barbie away. Boo.

[BadCat25]

Barbie goes to the University of South Dixie. South Dixie gained national attention over the recent hiring of former NFL coach Rhett Bob Cooter. Cooter was given a lifetime contract of $87 million per year and his staff was given lifetime contracts totaling $128 million per year. Cooter dismissed those who protested these contracts saying “the state disserves a national championship team and I will give it to them”. South Dixie President James Whitmore claimed the contracts were not excessive when compared to Wall Street CEO’s. Cooter gained national attention when he signed 57 players to NCAA letters of intent although he can only officially enroll 25. Cooter said he intends to run off the other 32. Cooter also dismissed 28 players from last year’s team saying they were not national championship level players. To pay for these contracts the university raised tuition by 300% and cancelled all classes in physics, chemistry, biology, engineering, economics and english lit. It also sold all student dormitories to private investors and fired all but 100 faculty members. Since he was hired Cooter has been accused of multiple recruiting violations including paying players, hiring call girls to entertain them and having other students take the ACT admission tests. Sports Illustrated preseason issue ranks South Dixie number one.

[CougarGrad]

Originally Posted by BadCat25

Barbie goes to the University of South Dixie. South Dixie gained national attention over the recent hiring of former NFL coach Rhett Bob Cooter. South Dixie number one.

I tried to get an update on this thread, but I got as far as "Rhett Bob Cooter" and cried laughing for ten minutes.

[gee_ess]

^^What the heck?! I don't care about the coach. I care about Barbie!

This is the most fabulous thread ever! Go american girls)))

barbie come back WE LOVE YOU

[☮♥ΠΒΦ]

Dearest Barbie,
This is the first post that I have truly enjoyed reading, BRAVO! I hope you and your pink ferrari and your designer shoes made it into the Madame Alexander house because I know that is where you truly belong. Please come back and tell us about the rest of your rush! We would be honored to hear the end!

[tld221]

sidebar: how the eff do you log in with that username?

[texas*princess]

Originally Posted by tld221

sidebar: how the eff do you log in with that username?

LOLZ I was wondering the same thing.

Maybe she uses the Windows character map!?

[Musicwalksuhome]

this is great!!
Barbie I have the perfect dress for you. I hope this is what you wore to pref night.

[☮♥ΠΒΦ]

Originally Posted by tld221

sidebar: how the eff do you log in with that username?

Me? Its the magic of copy and paste my friend.

[Ken_Carson]

My girlfriend, Barbie... she’s the most beautiful girl I know. We’ve been together for 48 years (not including a little break between 2004 and 2006) and she isn’t anything like you all describe. She would NEVER cheat on me, and the only basketball, football, and baseball player she ever did it with was ME... because I’m her perfect boyfriend Ken, and let’s face it... I can play any sport. I even won Olympic gold medals in 1974 and 1997.

As for Midge... I met Midge through Barbie and she is a really nice girl. She has had some issues in the fashion department, even though Barbie tries to keep her informed about all of the latest trends. Even so, all throughout high school, Midge never seemed to take her advice to heart. She marches to the beat of her own drum which I believed could hurt her in recruitment. My fraternity brothers had also met her, but none of them would give her a second look. I always thought that if she’d just change her look a little, I could hook her up with some of my brothers. I hoped she’d catch on when she saw all of the other well-dressed sorority girls. But then again, with chapters like the Rainbow Brights and Strawberry Shortcakes, she could have been led in a much more disastrous direction. Oh, and I must set the record straight... Midge does NOT have a dented nipple... but don’t ask me how I know that.

And I was NOT born Kendra. I am, and always have been, a guy. I will admit that I’ve had my moments, like my earring magic phase (http://www.manbehindthedoll.com/earringmagic.htm), but that’s all it was... a phase. And I understand that the hard, flat, flesh-toned underwear made people question things a little, but I assure you that I’m 100% male. And the huge zipper that I have on one of my pairs of pants is not to make up for something else that is lacking in size... it is simply the gateway to greatness!

[Barbie's_Rush]

Ken, as always you are my knight in shining armor! As for the other posts here, I am completely shocked and mortified! A girl takes a few days away from the computer to discover the cure to cancer while scaling Mount Everest and look what I return to!

It's clear that Bad Cat is really Super Chopper Mom's daughter. I mean, just look at her recruitment story! SEC girl ends up rushing at a Yankee school for mysterious reasons . . . I don't think it takes many brains to know that this simply isn't done unless there's something to hide. Little do Super Chopper and Bad Cat know that affiliates are not accepted at the top tier sororities at my school. Mwahahahaha .... the blades are going to be flying off the copter with that little piece of news!

As for the other gossip, y'all obviously have me confused with some other less than perfect Barbie. Perhaps you have fallen victim to Super Chopper's campaign of terror against my precious self. You'd all better be careful, since I am starting to fluff up my flouncing petticoats!

[SydneyK]

Originally Posted by Barbie's_Rush

As for the other gossip, y'all obviously have me confused with some other less than perfect Barbie. Perhaps you have fallen victim to Super Chopper's campaign of terror against my precious self. You'd all better be careful, since I am starting to fluff up my flouncing petticoats!

LOL at "campaign of terror"!

You're right, Barbie. We must have you confused with someone else. Please set the story straight!

[texas*princess]

Originally Posted by SydneyK

LOL at "campaign of terror"!

You're right, Barbie. We must have you confused with someone else. Please set the story straight!

Yeah, I think Barbie just put Super Chopper Mom & Bad Cat in there with North Korea in George W's "Axis of Evil"