dating a sweetheart and I'm NOT a greek

[PhiGam]

Our sweetheart has never hooked up with any of us, shes just good friends with a lot of the guys. Shouldn't you ask her this instead of us, we obviously have no idea about her particular situation. If you're the jealous type then DON'T date a sweetheart because she is going to have to do a lot of things with the fraternity, including date functions.

[ForeverRoses]

Originally Posted by PhiGam

Our sweetheart has never hooked up with any of us, shes just good friends with a lot of the guys. Shouldn't you ask her this instead of us, we obviously have no idea about her particular situation. If you're the jealous type then DON'T date a sweetheart because she is going to have to do a lot of things with the fraternity, including date functions.

Just curious, if your sweetheart is not dating a member and she is invitedto a date function, can she bring any date that she wants? So say your sweetheart starts dating a guy in another fraternity, is he able to go to your date parties?

[PhiGam]

Originally Posted by ForeverRoses

Just curious, if your sweetheart is not dating a member and she is invitedto a date function, can she bring any date that she wants? So say your sweetheart starts dating a guy in another fraternity, is he able to go to your date parties?

No, she goes with guys who have dates cancel at the last minute. She also finds like five guys dates from her sorority for all of our functions.

[33girl]

Originally Posted by PhiGam

No, she goes with guys who have dates cancel at the last minute. She also finds like five guys dates from her sorority for all of our functions.

ok, who are the 5 guys and why can't they find their own dates?

I dated the Tri Sig sweetheart for a while. I don't think they would have been too jazzed about me coming to a date party, LOL.

[Jestor]

Originally Posted by 33girl

ok, who are the 5 guys and why can't they find their own dates?

This strikes as a touch of snobbery going on here.

Not all Greeks are the most outgoing and social of people and so don't have as large a pool to draw from.

Or it might be that the guys have asked several girls, but the girls have legitimate reasons for not being able to attend.

[PhiGam]

Originally Posted by 33girl

ok, who are the 5 guys and why can't they find their own dates?

I dated the Tri Sig sweetheart for a while. I don't think they would have been too jazzed about me coming to a date party, LOL.

Sometimes people just don't have dates for one reason or another and she wants us to meet as many girls in her sorority as possible to improve relations, they're actually our homecoming partners for next year so its good to meet them now.
Maybe GLOs aren't as big where you're from, they have 150+ girls so its impossible to know them all and when you have 93 guys in your house, occasionally a few of them don't have dates.

[thru_da_wire]

thanks for clearing this up..2 answer the #3 post..they do respect me..and as a matter of fact my girl says its a possible that I can get a bid...ohh yeh that particular chapter is pretty wack. so, I really have no insecurities and jealous attitude towards them but even a square can get a groupie

[DSTCHAOS]

Originally Posted by thru_da_wire

thanks for clearing this up..2 answer the #3 post..they do respect me..and as a matter of fact my girl says its a possible that I can get a bid...ohh yeh that particular chapter is pretty wack. so, I really have no insecurities and jealous attitude towards them but even a square can get a groupie

troll.

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by thru_da_wire

thanks for clearing this up..2 answer the #3 post..they do respect me..and as a matter of fact my girl says its a possible that I can get a bid...ohh yeh that particular chapter is pretty wack. so, I really have no insecurities and jealous attitude towards them but even a square can get a groupie

Just so you know, the NPHC organizations don't give bids. We do things differently from other GLO's. In this thread you have members of different GLO's posting whose processes are different from the NPHC regarding sweethearts and other things. Like I said in my previous post, Iota Phi Theta is the only org in the NPHC that nationally recognizes their sweethearts. The other orgs in the NPHC no longer recognize or permit these groups.

NPHC Fraternities:

Alpha Phi Alpha
Kappa Alpha Psi
Omega Psi Phi
Phi Beta Sigma
Iota Phi Theta

NPHC Sororities:

Alpha Kappa Alpha
Delta Sigma Theta
Zeta Phi Beta
Sigma Gamma Rho

[PrettyBoy]

Originally Posted by thru_da_wire

So I'm involved with this girl who is an iota sweetheart..I'm not a greek and right now not sure if I'm going to go greek..I heard of the other glo sweetheart things like Sigma Doves, Kappa Diamonds or Omega Pearls. My question is are these groupies or what? It already bothers me to an extent that she is so involved with this but I understand how greek life can be for some people...so is it really an organization that does its own thing or just sugercoated groupies?

If it bothers you that she's involved in this, then you should leave her alone. Use your 1st instinct.

Me personally, I've never been a fan of dating sweethearts. I'm sure some are nice women, but I wouldn't get involved in a relationship with one.

[bellwisdom]

In my chapter of Sigma Chi the Sweatheart is elected by the chapter, the chapter advisors, the house mom, and some are even nominated by her sorority. We elect her based on her service to the community and her sorority, her grades, her character, her ambitions, and her love for the Fraternity. No, she does not have to sleep with any of the brothers or any of that foolishness. No, we do not ask her to find dates for any of the brothers for functions. His big brother or pledge brothers usually will help do that. The Sweatheart is like a sister to most of us and that's why we honor her. The only thing we require her to do is that she holds a position on our Mom's Weekend committee along with the House Mom. Other than that everything that she does is her choice. On a personal level I love having the sweatheart around because her point of view on things are sometimes some what different then the Brothers, sometimes a man need a womans prospective on things. She gave me lots of advise on how to improve relations with my little sister. So the Sweathearts and the house moms' are a big deal to me. I understand that there are some chapter's of Sigma Chi who do not have Sweatheart's, they are not a requirement. But I think they should have one. I also know that not every chapter utilizes the Sweatheart in the same way. But I hope I gave a different light on why we have our Sweathearts.

[brownsugardivah]

Im going to put my $.63 and $.64 cents in here. Just because the girl that you are dating is an Iota Sweetheart dont judge her by the organization. I can tell you that Iota Sweethearts are an organization that is here to help the brothers of Iota Phi Theta. And they truly are family. No we are not groupies, and we have done a lot to help support our fraternity since 1963. So if its the organization affiliation, dont stop talking to her just because she is active in an auxilary. And if her doing service with our sweetheart sisters and our frat brothers, going away to national conventions bothers you than maybe you should re-think dating ANYONE for that matter who is involved with a greek organization. Because that same uneasyiness that you feel with HER your going to feel with anyone that you date. A lot of ppl will think that we are groupies of Iota but thats just because we are very protective of each other. Especially being the last org in the d9 and just being disliked, talked about, etc etc....we just have a protective heart towards our brothers and in return they feel the need to protect us as well and guide us in the right direction so we wont end up like the other auxilaries running around aimlessly trying to attach onto a frat. But its nothing but family here.... but its the same case if you were dating a woman in a sorority who were affiliated with a fraternity (whether officially or unoficially) nobody will understand the bond they have with their brothers....so if its that connection that you question then maybe you should just date someone not affiliated with an organization at all.

My boyfriend broke up with me when I told him I was going on court to be an Iota Sweetheart and sadly to say he went on to pledge a fraternity, and 2 years later Ive done more with Iota Phi Theta than he has done with his organization, and I have 1 letter and he has 3. Judge her for the lady that she is. BUT I do say that our selection process is very strict and our brothers are very strict on us about how we act in public so I would love to say that everyone acts as much of a lady as we can 24/7....but she's a woman first before she's an Iota Sweetheart. So judge her on HER CHARACTER, and is she a loving person, does she support you as the man she's dating... does she have morals for herself....not the organization. Because at the end of the day, Iota Sweethearts doesnt make her who she is. It's just the organization that we do service with and for.

[breathesgelatin]

Originally Posted by brownsugardivah

Im going to put my $.63 and $.64 cents in here. Just because the girl that you are dating is an Iota Sweetheart dont judge her by the organization. I can tell you that Iota Sweethearts are an organization that is here to help the brothers of Iota Phi Theta. And they truly are family. No we are not groupies, and we have done a lot to help support our fraternity since 1963. So if its the organization affiliation, dont stop talking to her just because she is active in an auxilary. And if her doing service with our sweetheart sisters and our frat brothers, going away to national conventions bothers you than maybe you should re-think dating ANYONE for that matter who is involved with a greek organization. Because that same uneasyiness that you feel with HER your going to feel with anyone that you date. A lot of ppl will think that we are groupies of Iota but thats just because we are very protective of each other. Especially being the last org in the d9 and just being disliked, talked about, etc etc....we just have a protective heart towards our brothers and in return they feel the need to protect us as well and guide us in the right direction so we wont end up like the other auxilaries running around aimlessly trying to attach onto a frat. But its nothing but family here.... but its the same case if you were dating a woman in a sorority who were affiliated with a fraternity (whether officially or unoficially) nobody will understand the bond they have with their brothers....so if its that connection that you question then maybe you should just date someone not affiliated with an organization at all.

My boyfriend broke up with me when I told him I was going on court to be an Iota Sweetheart and sadly to say he went on to pledge a fraternity, and 2 years later Ive done more with Iota Phi Theta than he has done with his organization, and I have 1 letter and he has 3. Judge her for the lady that she is. BUT I do say that our selection process is very strict and our brothers are very strict on us about how we act in public so I would love to say that everyone acts as much of a lady as we can 24/7....but she's a woman first before she's an Iota Sweetheart. So judge her on HER CHARACTER, and is she a loving person, does she support you as the man she's dating... does she have morals for herself....not the organization. Because at the end of the day, Iota Sweethearts doesnt make her who she is. It's just the organization that we do service with and for.

Great to hear about your positive experience with Iota Sweethearts. It almost sounds like an org itself. Can you be an Iota Sweetheart and a member of an NPHC sorority?

[rhoyaltempest]

Originally Posted by breathesgelatin

Great to hear about your positive experience with Iota Sweethearts. It almost sounds like an org itself. Can you be an Iota Sweetheart and a member of an NPHC sorority?

Some say once a sweetheart or auxillary member, always a sweetheart or auxillary member but if you're asking if someone who is a sweetheart would be active as one once she becomes a sorority member, the answer is no.

Also, even though the young lady talks about being sisters to the Iotas (and that's fine if that's how she sees it), undergrad auxillaries of organizations in the NPHC (and again they are only recognized today by the Iotas) are (and always have been) viewed as little sisters or brothers. This is different from sorority and fraternity membership.

[brownsugardivah]

Yes. I have a lot of sweethearts are currently in sororities now.