A totally honest thread...from long long ago

[Benzgirl]

What a wonderful story. When I went through recruitment our school was past the religion issue, but many schools were still WASPy. I feel bad that you had to experience it but it sounds like you had a very happy ending.
What region of the country did you go to school?

[ellebud]

Pref and beyond:

So, you all have guess that I received an invitation to Pref at the laid back house. As my Rush Counselor handed me my invitation she gave me a meaningful look. I really didn't know that if I went that night I would get a bid so I was really stressed and did what all girls do from the beginning of time until now: Find other girls and get ready together.

I got together with several of the other Jewish girls. While we were excited Rush was an eye opening experience for some of us...and a painful reminder of other anti-semetic times in our lives. (See I said the words...). The anti-semitism was blatent, it was couched in the guise of "Where will all of us be the most COMFORTABLE?" And sometimes it is uncomfortable dealing with someone a bit different. On the other hand, we Jewish girls began talking and the question arose: If we don't try and change the system...who will? Does it need to be changed? (all this while applying eye shadow...). For all but 2 of us this was a moot point. We carried one house to Pref.

Pref was beautiful and meaningful. I knew that joining the laidback house was right for me. The one aforementioned Jewish girl was the first to break and joined a Christian house. My two friends who preffed two houses suicided and became my pledge sisters.

Loose ends:

So, the question becomes: What happened to the house where I had a rec? And what happened to my instant best friend who passed on me first round?

The first question is easy to answer: My cousin told me after rush that her chapter was the first to pledge a Jewish girl. And at the national level they received a lot of grief for that. (She is a good deal older than I am. She pledged around 1965). My cousin knew that I wouldn't get past the first round. The chapter at my school was old line. Okay then....

I saw Ms. Chicago's dress hanging on the door of her dorm room. It was gorgeous, and unused.

As for my new and instant and very temporary best friend? Right after rush I saw her on campus. She came up to me and asked if she could talk. We sat for an hour and her first words were, "I am a sophomore. This was my first rush and it might be my last. You see, despite my name and where I live....I am a Jew. I didn't know that my house didn't accept Jews until your name came up. I am so sorry. They wouldn't give you a chance." She discussed deactivating. (She didn't.) Her parents were devastated. (Her father wasn't born Jewish. He converted, very unusual for that time and place. But her mother was Jewish. And she was raised a Jew.) I listened. Finally I asked what the penalty would be if she told her sisters that she was Jewish. Would she be thrown out? She didn't answer. I still don't know the answer to that.

We saw each other on campus occasionally. But we never became friends.

The good news for me is and was I did find the best place for me. And all these years later I am glad I how things turned out for me. And I am really glad that my daughter, if she decides to rush, will have more choices but I hope the she has the same conclusion that she found the right place for her.

Oh and my rush counselor? She became my Big Sister...go figure.

^^^

Oh you're just terrible. We know you had a happy ending (beginning?) but somehow you left out the part where you're supposed to tell us where you went!

[SthrnZeta]

Originally Posted by OTW

^^^

Oh you're just terrible. We know you had a happy ending (beginning?) but somehow you left out the part where you're supposed to tell us where you went!

There's only a couple it could have been though, right?

[ForeverRoses]

^^^

She told us it was USC (California, not Carolina)

[ellebud]

I actually left out the sorority name on purpose. My point really was the truthful story with the hope that when girls write their stories that rushees (or pnms as they are now called) can learn what to do and not to do under real circumstances. And that if someone posts something about their rush that might not be so flattering about a house or chapter...learn from it and don't be afraid of retaliation if what you said is true, said in good taste, and has a possible benefit to the reader.

So: in full disclosure I will say: I am an alumnae of AEPhi. And I went to USC. (Southern California, not Carolina)

[catiebug]

Thank you very much for posting your story. I thoroughly enjoyed reading it.

Originally Posted by ellebud

I actually left out the sorority name on purpose. My point really was the truthful story with the hope that when girls write their stories that rushees (or pnms as they are now called) can learn what to do and not to do under real circumstances. And that if someone posts something about their rush that might not be so flattering about a house or chapter...learn from it and don't be afraid of retaliation if what you said is true, said in good taste, and has a possible benefit to the reader.

So: in full disclosure I will say: I am an alumnae of AEPhi. And I went to USC. (Southern California, not Carolina)

It was so wonderful to read your story. Thank you for sharing that with us and how wonderful for you and AEPhi!

To the OP (and everyone else), if you haven't already read this rush story, please do so when you get the time because it's my wish that all rush stories could be like this (and like yours too!):

CurlyGirly's UF Experience

I highly recommend it. I'm thinking kdonline (CurlyGirly's HS Journalism teacher) recommends it too!

[AOIIalum]

Originally Posted by ellebud

I actually left out the sorority name on purpose. My point really was the truthful story with the hope that when girls write their stories that rushees (or pnms as they are now called) can learn what to do and not to do under real circumstances. And that if someone posts something about their rush that might not be so flattering about a house or chapter...learn from it and don't be afraid of retaliation if what you said is true, said in good taste, and has a possible benefit to the reader.

So: in full disclosure I will say: I am an alumnae of AEPhi. And I went to USC. (Southern California, not Carolina)

AEPhi must be very proud to claim you, ellebud! Thank you for sharing your story with us.

[SthrnZeta]

I was referring to the org - there's only a couple historically Jewish houses, right? So in "reading between the lines" we could clearly rule out several houses.

[tld221]

^^^ read back a few posts, she already says her affiliation.

[SthrnZeta]

^^ I know that, I was referring to when OTW asked what house she was in. I was saying that we could have easily speculated long before now.

[ealymc]

Oh, Ellebud... you have effortlessly become one of my favorite posters!!! What a wonderful story so expertly told.

[Leslie Anne]

Just wanted to add my thanks for telling us your story. Sounds like it was really difficult with so much prejudice. I'm glad you found your home though.

[honeychile]

Fascinating thread, and an artistic flair in the telling! Just out of curiosity, isn't this the chapter from the book "Loose Change"?