Can Men and Women Be Truly Just Friends?

[Dionysus]

Originally posted by SummerChild
Hi Quala67,
Not trying to be funny, just curious. Based on your post, it seems like you are a female but the fraternal information indicates "brother." Is that the way that females are referred to in the org or are you a male? Just wondering about the lingo of your org.
SC

She's in APO. Guys and girls are called brothers.

[Quala67]

Dionysus is correct, in Alpha Phi Omega, all initiated persons are referred to as 'Brothers,' no matter what the gender. I am proudly a female Brother of APO.

Any my ex-husband is also my Brother, and his parents, and my sister....made for very interesting conversations!

[SummerChild]

Oh, ok. That's interesting convention. Thanks for the info. I think that my feminist mind would wonder how come everyone can't be called a sister instead. LOL
SC

Originally posted by Quala67
Dionysus is correct, in Alpha Phi Omega, all initiated persons are referred to as 'Brothers,' no matter what the gender. I am proudly a female Brother of APO.

Any my ex-husband is also my Brother, and his parents, and my sister....made for very interesting conversations!

[Munchkin03]

Some of my closest friends are guys, and I can honestly say with the exception of the two that I've dated, I've not felt any romantic sentiment towards them. They are like brothers. Some are gay. I think it can work.

[Steeltrap]

I think I'm going to see whether this can happen. I don't have many straight male friends right now.

[Marie]

Originally posted by SummerChild
Oh, ok. That's interesting convention. Thanks for the info. I think that my feminist mind would wonder how come everyone can't be called a sister instead. LOL
SC

My business fraternity, Alpha Kappa Psi, is the same way. I'm not sure if everyone is referred to as brother b/c it is a fraternity or b/c it was originally an all male organization. I think that it is the former though.

[AlphaFrog]

Originally posted by SummerChild
Oh, ok. That's interesting convention. Thanks for the info. I think that my feminist mind would wonder how come everyone can't be called a sister instead. LOL
SC

I think I remember reading that APhiO voted to let in female members under the stipulation that they are still brothers. It used to be an all male org.

[Quala67]

*off topic, but figured I'd step back in*

Alpha Phi Omega National Service Fraternity was founded in 1925 as the 'Boy Scout' Fraternity. In fact, until the late 60's, all members also had to be affiliated with the BSA. In December 1976, at our National Convention in Atlanta, GA, women were given full memberships rights. In fact, in our National bylaws it states that all initiated members shall be referred to as Brothers. If you want to know more about APO, check out http://apo.org, or feel free to PM me.

*apologizes for getting folks off topic*

[Strongbeauty]

I have a male friend who I have been friends with for about 3 or 4 years and sex has never come up. I have more male friends but I haven't known them as long so who knows what will come up in the future. One in particular I view more like a little brother so that would be like incest.

I say that to say yes men and women can be just friends. That's like saying that homosexuals can't have friends of the same sex because they are somehow genetically wired to want to jump each others bones.

[AKA_Monet]

Are you looking for a mate or are you looking for a friend?

If you are dating and are looking for a mate, it will be tough to become friends depending on your maturity level.

If you are just looking for friendship in general, I think it will be relatively easy for opposite sexes to be friends no matter what the sexual orientation. Commonalities, general likes and dislikes, whatever, the bonds of friendship are shared when one keeps a perspective on the purpose of this relationship...

Whereas, seeking a mate is different. Eventually, those involved could be friends. However, there are many ways to express one's mating habits. If one is attracted physically and sparks fly whenever they are together, then it will be extremely difficult to build any kind of friendship relationship.

That thing about agape and eros...

At any rate, personally, I do not have very many male friends. Especially now that I am married. And my husband has very few female friends that I know all about. Most of the ones I know about are married with children. Besides if he wanted to get with one of them for whatever reason, he knows he'd be giving up on the best thing that happened to him

[DSTCHAOS]

Yes.....

[delph998]

How did I miss all of this?! LOL!