Pregnant Pledge

[roqueemae]

I could only imagine if someone looked up some of the reasons I have seen....

[beta~chi~2004]

i am a mother of 2. A 3 yr. old and a 8 month old. I pledged last semester when my son was only a few months old. yes being a mother is a full time job. so is being in a sorority but my sisters work with me and understand if i can't attend events since i do have childeren. i'm sure that any chapter would be willing to work with you for a situation like that

Originally posted by beta~chi~2004
i'm sure that any chapter would be willing to work with you for a situation like that

That's a really bold statement that I know many would disagree with.

I know that my own chapter, while smaller than most, doesn't have the time or resources to make exceptions like that.

Originally posted by AKA_Monet
... Because I can DAYUM sure tell you all, you are not the first little pledge girl that came up pregnant at a conservative campus...

Just to point out if that statement was meant for me I wasnt a pledge...I was alum, and I was already finished pledging HLs....

[gpb1874]

one chapter at my old campus pledged a girl who was pregnant, but she didn't know it at the time. her parents made her go home at the end of the semester, so that was that.

i think that each chapter needs to take into consideration the actual situation and the PNM involved. She might have great support at home, be financially stable, do good in classes, etc. She may make a great member! But, the opposite of the above might be true too and the PNM may not be able to handle everything with a baby, classes and sorority. whatever the case is, it really needs to be discussed between the PNM and chapter.

For AKA_monet: many universities only allow currently registered students to be active in officially recognized campus organizations. it is mostly for 2 reasons: one, if a non-student member does something against the student code of conduct (but not neccessarily illegal), the univ has no recourse to discipline that person. that member can go on with that behavior and have no repurcussions. universities want and need to be able to protect their students. two, officially recognized organizations receive benefits from student service fees, such as access to buildings, staff and possibly money. since resources are very limited at many colleges, administrators want to make sure the money is being used for it's students. this should apply to all student organizations, not just greek. hth - just wanted to help shed some light on why colleges restrict membership.

[Little E]

Originally posted by gpb1874
two, officially recognized organizations receive benefits from student service fees, such as access to buildings, staff and possibly money. since resources are very limited at many colleges, administrators want to make sure the money is being used for it's students. this should apply to all student organizations, not just greek. hth - just wanted to help shed some light on why colleges restrict membership.

FYI- Many colleges will recognize but not actually FUND greek orgs. Student fees are supposed to go to open membership orgs, thus greeks have dues. Maybe I misunderstood your post though.

This thread still baffels me. I'm not southern and I'm not conservative so I guess I'm just left out of the loop. However, I thought that our orgs were for the betterment of women, why a shut a door before giving someone a chance...I know we'll all never agree. I'm baffled.

[kayla0deegee]

My main argument was not the fact the girl was pregnant. The only difference between pregnant girls and all the other girls were that the other girls got lucky(meaning it could happen to anyone)...I'm not trying to sound cold or uncompassionate, im just saying my sorority would at things that have already been mentioned. I know it's hard enough for me to go to school, work, and still manage to be active in my sorority..so I could only imagine having a child on top of that!

[RUASTgrrl]

I know it's hard enough for me to go to school, work, and still manage to be active in my sorority..so I could only imagine having a child on top of that!

Just b/c you (or I for that matter) wouldn't be able to do it, doesn't mean that there aren't women out there that CAN cope and thrive. Also, we all know, esp. im more traditional conservative locations, that "secret births" are not uncommon.

[IrresistibleDG]

I know a woman who is in a sorority. She pledged last fall and has 2 year old child. She went thourgh as a freshman and now holds a leadership position in the chapter. She also is a very strong student and honestly one of the best mothers i have ever seen. Her little boys is very sweet and you can tell he loves her very much. He is her main priority and her sisters support her in many ways. She is actually a better mother than most women i have met who have no other commitments other than school.

[AKA_Monet]

Originally posted by KDLady00
Just to point out if that statement was meant for me I wasnt a pledge...I was alum, and I was already finished pledging HLs....

No that statement was NEVER meant to be directed toward you... Please do not take it that way and I do sincerely apologize if you did...

I just know that Alpha Kappa Alpha Sorority, Inc. does not discriminate against women who have had children or are pregnant. I guess we see the world differently from a lot of other sororities.

[gpb1874]

Originally posted by Little E
FYI- Many colleges will recognize but not actually FUND greek orgs. Student fees are supposed to go to open membership orgs, thus greeks have dues. Maybe I misunderstood your post though.

i realize that. my old campus did not offer funding to specific chapters, but my new one does. i personally think that greeks should be offered the opportunity to get funding from student service fees. they do discrimiate based on gender, but they are also exempt from having to allow the opposite sex through title 9, or was it 7? can't remember off hand. single sex sports clubs could get funding and they are exempt as well, so i don't see why greeks shouldn't have access.

the amount of funding chapters may get in no way covers all the costs associated with any organization (greek or not), so it is still necessary to collect dues.

fees are usually allocated to the governing councils or Greek Life in general, which goes to support all chapters and their members through speakers, leadership conferences, retreats, greek week, etc. in this sense, non-student members of a chapter would still benefit from the student fees. many administrators are hard core either way, so it can be difficult to show the discrepencies.

[Kaylun]

In response to those of you who say you can not be a parent, a soroity sister and a student at the same time, YOU ARE VERY WRONG!! I am a full time student majoring in Psychology, I have a three month old daughter and I am vice-president of my sorority. I think it is horrible to say what a person can handle for them. I love being a sister, but I also love being a mom. By being a sister, I have NEVER neglected my responsibilities as a mother. Yes it is a lot of work, but if you want it to work out and you want to be a part of something, you make it work. People do not look down on an organization for allowing a pregnant pledge. If they do, you should not value their opinion anyway.

[BetteDavisEyes]

Originally posted by Kaylun
In response to those of you who say you can not be a parent, a soroity sister and a student at the same time, YOU ARE VERY WRONG!! I am a full time student majoring in Psychology, I have a three month old daughter and I am vice-president of my sorority. I think it is horrible to say what a person can handle for them. I love being a sister, but I also love being a mom. By being a sister, I have NEVER neglected my responsibilities as a mother. Yes it is a lot of work, but if you want it to work out and you want to be a part of something, you make it work. People do not look down on an organization for allowing a pregnant pledge. If they do, you should not value their opinion anyway.

I'd say good for you! However, you might be the exception to the rule. I definitely believe that a woman can be a mom, or pregnant, and be a sister. What I also believe is that unless she is extremely good at time management & knows her priorities well, something is bound to suffer & I hate the thought of someone putting their social life ahead of their child or school.

[Kaylun]

Originally posted by BetteDavisEyes
I'd say good for you! However, you might be the exception to the rule. I definitely believe that a woman can be a mom, or pregnant, and be a sister. What I also believe is that unless she is extremely good at time management & knows her priorities well, something is bound to suffer & I hate the thought of someone putting their social life ahead of their child or school.

I agree with this, but to be honest, before I had my daughter, I had horrible time-management skills, but I definitly learned very quickly how to prioritize and fit everything in...WITHOUT neglecting anything. I think for me, having my daughter actually made me a better person in many ways. It is hard to say how motherhood will affect a person, but I still do not think that a person expecting a baby should be turned away from an organization because of that alone. Every woman knows what she can and can not accomplish. So I say, Give her a chance

[Munchkin03]

I think most of us, myself included, are looking at this through the eyes of NPC sororities at residential colleges. From that viewpoint, yes, a pregnant PNM or active can be a problem for a sorority that has to fill a house and is busy all year with different events. We can't assume, however, that every college and every sorority is exactly like our own.

The obligations of Greeks at some commuter colleges might allow "non-traditional" students to be active in Greek life. A lot of these schools don't have Greek Week, Homecoming, mixers every weekend, Formal Recruitment, Dance Marathon, and formals every semester in addition to living in a house or suite. With only one or two major events a semester outside of regular chapter meetings, a student with a family could be an active member of her sorority without letting school, sorority, or family suffer.