My Sorority Pledge? I Swore Off Sisterhood

[Ilaria Ame]

Originally Posted by PM_Mama00

And perhaps not everyone can be as strong as you? I'm sick of people on here thinking that everyone thinks and feels the same way they do about experiences. Everyone is different.

i understand what you mean. i was only criticizing the fact that she feels all women are not trustworthy because of her experience; sorry if that's not how it came across. if i were to see one of the people i was talking about in my situation, i can tell you exactly what i'd feel: my blood would run cold and i would want to leave as soon as possible. it would bring me back to a place in my life i have no wish to revisit. i empathize with her in that aspect. the difference is that i've acknowledged my role in that situation and don't place all the blame on the people around me. but as others have said, the fact that she can't get over her distrust of all women, just just the one in particular, shows that she clearly needs some help.

[Ch2tf]

Originally Posted by fantASTic

It's come to a point where my male friends have to check IDs to make sure she's telling the truth that she's over 18 [especially for freshmen], make sure she has consumed not a drop of alcohol, AND make sure that she won't regret it tomorrow. That's a burden, considering all those are things that SHE should control. I'm tired of hearing stories of men accused of "gray rape"; "I invited him into my room, we were making out and ended up having sex. I totally regret it! He raped me!" We shouldn't just assume that everyone who claims they were raped was, indeed, raped.

I agree with you to a certain extent, but I also think it's the responsibility of a guy to ensure his own safety. So if that means he has to check IDs, check and double check that a girl is willing, then so be it.

In general I think it's a bad idea to have sex with someone when either party is "drunk" to the point that either of them are not actually thinking about what they are doing. Not to mention the fact that you're having sex with a person that you barely know. All of it, for both parties, plays are part in the outcome. If the sex is really that important enough to put yourself in such a position, then that is a decision that you consciously made and have to deal with the outcomes.

Originally Posted by fantASTic

This stuff actually happens. And it's ridiculous. A false claim of rape, even if he's not convicted, can ruin a man's life. Ladies: would you REALLY trust someone if you found out that he'd been accused of rape, even if he had been proven innocent? I wouldn't.

On this I totally agree and I think how rape accusations are originally handled /perceived are always biased toward one of the parties, but the only way to avoid this (and it isn't 100%) is to make smarter decisions concerning who you sleep with, and under what circumstances it happens.

[UGAalum94]

Originally Posted by bengay

This was a great article. How did you here about it?

By the way, Rudey is it? Would you be interested in becoming a DIK?

Isn't he already?

[Wolfman]

There's an irony in that many of the posts call for the woman to "get a life and move on." When people who suffer traumas of various kinds do just that and bury them in their "past," one day, prompted by some strange occurance, out of the blue these things may come rushing back into their consciousness with all the same raw emotions and ambivalent feelings about the people involved.These things can't be swept under the rug of our hearts and minds.This is why we do need clergy,friends, family and psychological professionals, at times.

[kathykd2005]

Originally Posted by Wolfman

There's an irony in that many of the posts call for the woman to "get a life and move on." When people who suffer traumas of various kinds do just that and bury them in their "past," one day, out of the blue, these things can come rushing back into their consciousness with all the same raw emotions and ambivalent feelings about the people involved.These things can't be swept under the rug of our hearts and minds.This is why we do need clergy,friends, family and psychological professionals, at times.

Which is precisely why many of us SAID she should seek professional help, including myself. Did you miss those posts?

[Wolfman]

Originally Posted by kathykd2005

Which is precisely why many of us SAID she should seek professional help, including myself. Did you miss those posts?

Been MIA of late.

[kathykd2005]

Originally Posted by Wolfman

Been MIA of late.

Originally Posted by kathykd2005

I hate saying this, but it sounds like this woman simply needs to go to some therapy and move on.

Ok, so I'll post that for posterity, then. Cheers.