Sexualize your daughters? At what age?

[James]

You are misintepreting.

I wrote: "But my qustion is when do you start dressing your daughter up in such a way that they become sex objects to males?"

This is a reality check, if you allow them to dress in a revealing fashion wearing make-up like a grown woman, they are going to be viewed in a sexual way by males.

You seem to be saying, and correct me if I am wrong, that as a mom your daughter should be able ro dress and wear make-up in a way that is perceived as sexuall provacative without anyone looking at them in a sexual manner.

I don't think thats realistic. Thats like if girls that got upset if you looked at their ass even thoughn their was writing on it.

Cuaphi, why is the thread title odd? When you dress your daughter in a way that society deems sexual, you are sexualizing your daughter.

Originally posted by valkyrie
These are really two different questions -- you're asking (1) when should you start dressing your daughter as a sex object and (2) when should you allow her to wear makeup or dress in revealing clothes. The first question, along with the question "Sexualize your daughters?" is, frankly, just creepy, and not at all the same as the second question.

Anyway, on the bra strap issue, I don't think bra straps are a big deal at all. There's nothing inherenly "naughty" about them.

[valkyrie]

I'm not misunderstanding. Why would you dress up your daughter? Her dressing herself is one thing -- you dressing her up is entirely different.

Originally posted by James
You are misintepreting.

I wrote: "But my qustion is when do you start dressing your daughter up in such a way that they become sex objects to males?"

This is a reality check, if you allow them to dress in a revealing fashion wearing make-up like a grown woman, they are going to be viewed in a sexual way by males.

You seem to be saying, and correct me if I am wrong, that as a mom your daughter should be able ro dress and wear make-up in a way that is perceived as sexuall provacative without anyone looking at them in a sexual manner.

I don't think thats realistic. Thats like if girls that got upset if you looked at their ass even thoughn their was writing on it.

Cuaphi, why is the thread title odd? When you dress your daughter in a way that society deems sexual, you are sexualizing your daughter.

[Peaches-n-Cream]

I also think that the title of this thread is strange. Parents shouldn't sexualize their daughters. They should prepare them for the changes in their bodies which inevitably occur. They should prepare them for the reactions they will get from men because men will react. It can be a very difficult time for a girl.

[James]

I don't want to get bogged down in semantics. Parents dress their kids by buying them clothes . . any parents here willing to verify that?

Also parents tend to know what their kids are wearing and have various ways of controlling it. Sanctions and rewards.

Originally posted by valkyrie
I'm not misunderstanding. Why would you dress up your daughter? Her dressing herself is one thing -- you dressing her up is entirely different.

[valkyrie]

Originally posted by James
I don't want to get bogged down in semantics. Parents dress their kids by buying them clothes . . any parents here willing to verify that?

Also parents tend to know what their kids are wearing and have various ways of controlling it. Sanctions and rewards.

Dude, you're talking about sexualizing and dressing up daughters. I don't think it's getting bogged down in semantics to say that sounds creepy as all hell, but hey, whatever floats your boat, so to speak.

[cuaphi]

No. No woman in her right mind is going to choose to dress her little girl is overtly sexual clothing. If I have a daughter someday I will dress her in pretty little dresses and maybe permit lipgloss or tinted chapstick til she's old enough to make her own decisions. If she's like most little girls she'll decide she wants to pick her own clothes somewhere in late elementary school. Then we'll start discussing what is and is not appropriate as she makes choices and I start attempting to guide them while still letting her be her own person.

Pageant mothers and Patsy Ramsey excluded, mothers do not choose to "sexualize" their daughters.

Maybe you're confusing girls with boys. I was picking out my own clothes in 4th or 5th grade. My brother (age 23) still has mom pick him up some khaki's here and there.

[James]

Ok then I completely concede the point. A parent's actions or inaction does not result in the way their child dresses in any way.

Nor does the actions or inactions of the parent effect the sexualization of the daughter. That includes pageant moms etc.


Parents don't dress their kids. Parents don't help them buy clothes and allow them to dress either. Parents have no input and exist in a state of mindless limbo. Therefore they bear no responsibility for how their daughter looks, how she might be perceived or anything else.

Originally posted by valkyrie
Dude, you're talking about sexualizing and dressing up daughters. I don't think it's getting bogged down in semantics to say that sounds creepy as all hell, but hey, whatever floats your boat, so to speak.

[Lil' Hannah]

Oh, probably around age 8 or so. Maybe younger if she's more mature. The sooner the better, eh?

[sugar and spice]

Originally posted by Lil' Hannah
Oh, probably around age 8 or so. Maybe younger if she's more mature. The sooner the better, eh?

I think she might be ready around six. I mean, if she's your daughter.

[cuaphi]

Originally posted by James
Parents don't dress their kids. Parents don't help them buy clothes and allow them to dress either. Parents have no input and exist in a state of mindless limbo. Therefore they bear no responsibility for how their daughter looks, how she might be perceived or anything else.

Okay, by saying "sexualize your daughter" the wording of that implies, to at least three of us, that you are talking about intentionally turning your child into a sex object. That's all I'm saying.

[James]

ahh you are like Jean Binet's parents.

Originally posted by Lil' Hannah
Oh, probably around age 8 or so. Maybe younger if she's more mature. The sooner the better, eh?

[James]

I guess people could ignorantly be doing it or allowing it, but I think people are bright enough to be aware of the consequences right?

We can forsee certain things.

Certainly several of the posters on here have expressed that its a situation to be avoided. That indicates an awareness of where something like that might go.

Originally posted by cuaphi
Okay, by saying "sexualize your daughter" the wording of that implies, to at least three of us, that you are talking about intentionally turning your child into a sex object. That's all I'm saying.

[GeekyPenguin]

If I ever spawn I am sending my kid to a Catholic school with a strict dress code like my parents did, so she thinks just being able to wear jeans is fun.

HOWEVER I am also going to raise her to be a little feminist because the last thing I would want my daughter to do is be a subservient little wanker.

Kthnkxbye.

[Optimist Prime]

Whatever age her friends are.

[Optimist Prime]

Meaning that I trust nature enough to know that girls all start wearing make up/getting ears peierced and I guess putting down barbies at around the same age as each other just like when guys stop trading baseball cards and start noticeing that girls have started wearing make up, and that was our cue to go on. This post really isn't going anywhere. God, writing is hard. This my is pre writing exercise.