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  #46  
Old 07-06-2006, 07:33 AM
kddani kddani is offline
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Again, to reiterate, it's the summer. Many AA's take a break for the summer, many times officers change over the summer, etc.

And like honeychile said, AA is NOT a common thing. Many AA groups would have no idea how to deal with it. They have no idea what the procedures are. And quite frankly, if they don't know much about it, they may even think it's really weird that someone keeps contacting them about it.

It gets frustrating to read various AI threads (not singling out this thread- i've seen this in pretty much all of the threads) of the PNAM being constantly impatient about the AI process. AI is a very rare privilege. It is not a guarantee, it is not a right. As has been said by so many people, it's a process that, if successful, can take a very long time, sometimes years. I have seen so many threads this summer that talk about "why aren't they getting back to me?", etc. This still continues even after it's been explained why they may not be getting back to a PNAM right now. I know it can be hard to be patient, but you (collective "you") knew up front getting into this process that it can take a long time and that AI is NOT a common thing at all. The group may not be getting back to you because they don't know if they should, or maybe they don't think you're a good candidate and are trying to be polite. We don't know.

There are a lot of national/international officers that read these boards, and it really would not take them long to figure out who you are if you are trying to AI into their group. Just as we caution PNMs to be careful with what they say in their rush threads, AI's should be just as, if not more, careful. You're even easier to identify.

/rant about this summer's crop of PNAI's

More specific advice to the OP:
It seems that your life is sorta in transition right now. I personally would advise waiting until you know what you're going to do (i.e. law school, etc.) before you really pursue the AI process. You don't know where you're going to be, etc. It would be a shame for you to pursue AI and then move to a place where there wasn't an Alumnae Association for that group. If your life is in transition and there's a good possibility you would be changing locations, don't waste an AA's time if chances are you're not going to be there. Wait until you have some more stability in your life.

With all of this going on in your life- why now?

If you do get into and decide to attend law school, trust me, that will be more than enough to keep you busy!
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  #47  
Old 07-06-2006, 10:16 AM
blueangel blueangel is offline
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Yes, Kddani, you're very right regarding AI being rare. And as you correctly pointed out... many people in many organizations aren't quite sure what the procedures are. This can cause delays, miscommunications, dropped balls, etc.

And here-in lies the problem. In my case, had I not continued to ask questions, I would still be waiting. I fell through the cracks through no fault of anyone-- just that, AI is so rare, it turned out that some of the people trying to get my situation moved ahead didn't fill out the correct paperwork, and things dropped to a complete stand still.

Looking back at my e-mails, nearly an entire year elapsed at one point with no contact from anyone in the organization. (the whole process took three years-- and I wasn't even seeking AI! I didn't know there was such a thing. It was suggested to me by our district president.) What was I to think when so much time elapsed with no contact? It turns out that it WASN'T because they didn't want me.. but rather that everyone involved thought everything was taken care of. I later found out, everything WASN'T taken care of. Again, through no fault of their own. They just didn't know.

A kind soul on Greek Chat made some inquiries on my behalf, and was able to find out where the ball had been dropped to get things moving for me again.

Prior to that, there were so many times that I didn't know if I should continue to contact the organization, or if I should throw in the towel. Not being psychic, it's so hard to know if a GLO has decided not to admit you in, or if someone just forgot to fill out a piece of paperwork. Are you being assertive by keeping contact, are you being a pain? It's so hard to know when you're crossing the line.

I can't blame the PNAMs for being frustrated. It's far kinder to receive a "sorry, you're not for us" than being left to dangle in the wind.

Since this whole AI concept is so rare and relatively new to most organizations, there generally isn't any one specific person appointed to handle that. Maybe there should be... and maybe that will come in the future.

(edited to add that Kddani is correct that the summer is often very slow. People are on vacation, alumnae chapters generally stop until fall, and many groups are busy with convention. My opinion: I wouldn't advise any followup contact until September or October.)

Last edited by blueangel; 07-06-2006 at 10:34 AM.
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  #48  
Old 07-06-2006, 12:16 PM
MJo19 MJo19 is offline
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If you are that frustrated with us (collective us) then why read the threads? What we need is support and some questions answered, not someone to rant at us like we are kids. Yes, we know it is rare. Yes, we know it is a very special honor. Can that still mean we are impatient? Sure why not? Weren't you (collective you to everyone who rushed in college) impatient or nervous for your final bid to come? Why can't we be impatient for that final vote to come down (in my case) or waiting for that first contact back? I wouldn't even call it impatient; I would put it down as anxious. Sorry, I normally bite my tongue in times like this, but I just get sick of people ranting about this and that when all the person needs is support, especially when it includes me since I am part of this summer's "crop." The same exact thing happened on one of my threads, in the aspect of someone feeling the need to rant, but we are all allowed our opinions. Ecupidelta, whatever you think is right at this point in your life, go for it. Follow your heart (I know it sounds mushy, but it is so true).
P.S. Hmmm...crop..I so claim corn. Ecupidelta..do you want to be soybeans? Maybe someone else could be wheat, pumpkins, oats, hay...

Last edited by MJo19; 07-06-2006 at 12:31 PM.
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  #49  
Old 07-06-2006, 12:19 PM
LouisaMay LouisaMay is offline
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Hang in there, ladies. I certainly did not wait for the "ideal" time in my life to AI.

That being said, it is always important to evaluation all factors when making a major decision about anything.
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  #50  
Old 07-06-2006, 01:03 PM
SmartBlondeGPhB SmartBlondeGPhB is offline
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I would suggest using this advice from BlueAngel.....

"A kind soul on Greek Chat made some inquiries on my behalf, and was able to find out where the ball had been dropped to get things moving for me again."

Find someone willing to assist.

And yes, summer is a VERY slow time for alumnae groups as they prepare for the upcoming year, most of them won't have events until Aug/Sept. It can also be very busy at the headquarters level. I know ours is incredibly busy since we just finished convention and our financial year ends July 31.

But I will agree with kddani, going on and on about the waiting isn't a way to cause people to want to help you........
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  #51  
Old 07-06-2006, 04:46 PM
Jimmy Choo Jimmy Choo is offline
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Ok.... this thread is about a heartbeat away from being a train wreck! All I wanted was some feedback on how long others have waited AFTER they have MET with a group (which FYI I did meet with once the summer began). I never expected the rants that have shown up about my question! I never thought asking a question would be construed as complaining about how long it takes!!!! I doubt this will stop anybody but I respectfully ask that the rants find there way somewhere else. I asked the questions that I have because I want feedback and another viewpoint. I don't per se want the "sunshine blown up my butt" but I don't want to feel like I've been beaten over the head either. I don't ask that everything be sugar-coated but I do ask that it at least be fairly nice!!!!! All I wanted was the take of other PNAM's! I know every experience is NOT the same, but I still wanted to know what some of them had to say.

Oh and as to why now.... b/c I feel that this is the right time in my life. I took into account that I MIGHT be going to school. Notice the word MIGHT. I have not applied to any school and even if I apply it clearly does not guarantee that any of them will take me. And if by some chance they do... well that's a bridge to cross when I get there, not before.

And thank you to those of you who sent some warm words my way!

As for my crop..... strawberries.... I love them!!!
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  #52  
Old 07-06-2006, 08:41 PM
Scandia Scandia is offline
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For my crop, I'll take a nice vintage of grapes.

I'm waiting till this extremely busy month at work is over to contact a local person that I was given the name and email of for one of the organizations. I'll also re-contact the person that first wrote me about it if I don't hear back from her again.

And I'm focusing on two organizations for now, rather than spreading myself thin. These two have philanthropies that are really meaningful to me- and for not so obvious reasons.
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  #53  
Old 07-06-2006, 09:21 PM
Duchovnysfan Duchovnysfan is offline
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To answer your question before all the rants started, I think the waiting period really depends on how each sorority approaches AI. We don't know which sorority it is b/c everyone reveals at the end of their AI journey for preserve disclosure. For some it takes a few months and other a couple of years. I think a gauge of PNAM's waiting period really does not give you any insight b/c there are too many variables involved. Treat your experience as your own and whatever time it takes, it takes. That goes with anything that requires a waiting period in life. Take it as it comes, distract yourself in other things and if you believe too much time b/w communication/exchanges (more like 4 months) then call to see what's going on, many times it could be you were lost in the shuffle for whatever reason.

I know very little about AI, but I do know if they did not want you, they will tell you so in a nice and respectful way.
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  #54  
Old 07-06-2006, 10:11 PM
AlphaFrog AlphaFrog is offline
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I have made myself more familar with the AI process, with my own sorority, and with a friend who is persuing her options, and I feel I just need to say this: In SOME NPC sororities, AI is rare or unheard of or not done. In others, this is simply not true. Some sororities have really developed their AI program as an active part of their AA. Each group is different, and while in XYZ, you may have to have been in a local that was absorbed, or in CDE you may have to be an advisor for a zillion years or a nobel peace prize winner to qualify...in other groups it may have started to become a common process. Let's stop saying ALL ALUMNA INITIATION IS RARE AND A WONDERFUL PRESTIGIOUS HONOR, because you don't know what other groups do about it, unless you look into it. These ladies are working hard to make their dreams come true and deserve some support. I applaud these ladies whether they spend years and jump through 200 hoops to get there, or whether they sign a check and are initiated 3 days later. It is up to each NPC to decide, and up to each lady which and how many groups they choose to persue.
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  #55  
Old 07-06-2006, 10:14 PM
kddani kddani is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlphaFrog
In others, this is simply not true. Some sororities have really developed their AI program as an active part of their AA.

...in other groups it may have started to become a common process. Let's stop saying ALL ALUMNA INITIATION IS RARE AND A WONDERFUL PRESTIGIOUS HONOR, because you don't know what other groups do about it, unless you look into it.
All I can really say to your post is huh? Since when? I think i've talked with people from the great majority of NPC groups about AI over the past 2 years or so, and you're the first person I have ever heard say this.
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  #56  
Old 07-06-2006, 10:28 PM
Drolefille Drolefille is offline
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I know that SK's AI process is about as straight forward as our recruitment process, or perhaps our COB/CR process today. That doesn't mean everyone is familiar with it, or that it happens every day of course, but it's in the handbook as it were.

It IS an honor, but just because it's the Purple Heart (hee SK) doesn't make it the Congressional Medal of Honor.

Capice?
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  #57  
Old 07-06-2006, 10:49 PM
Jimmy Choo Jimmy Choo is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Scandia
For my crop, I'll take a nice vintage of grapes.
Oh sweet grapes!!!!!!! Are you making your own wine? After all of this I could use a bottle or two!
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  #58  
Old 07-07-2006, 03:03 AM
Duchovnysfan Duchovnysfan is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlphaFrog
ALL ALUMNA INITIATION IS RARE AND A WONDERFUL PRESTIGIOUS HONOR,
I think that's a broad brush and really I think AI is rare b/c not many have heard of this process. From what I have gathered, it's very rare and not accepting at the rate that you would see at recruitment or else why would it take so long for someone to become an AI.

Seriously, I think the ranting should stop and go to another post b/c it's really overshadowing ecupidelta's journey and experience which is not fair to her. I think we should respect that there is differing views about AI and focus on her journey. She asked a question and hopefully she got an answer so move on and do it in another thread.
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  #59  
Old 07-07-2006, 07:50 AM
Scandia Scandia is offline
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Ecupidelta- I only have made wine in microbiology class. I still love wine. And grape juice. Hence I picked grapes as my crop.
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  #60  
Old 07-07-2006, 09:29 AM
Drolefille Drolefille is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Duchovnysfan
I think that's a broad brush and really I think AI is rare b/c not many have heard of this process. From what I have gathered, it's very rare and not accepting at the rate that you would see at recruitment or else why would it take so long for someone to become an AI.

Seriously, I think the ranting should stop and go to another post b/c it's really overshadowing ecupidelta's journey and experience which is not fair to her. I think we should respect that there is differing views about AI and focus on her journey. She asked a question and hopefully she got an answer so move on and do it in another thread.
You did just take A-frog's message completely out of context however.. she agrees with you.
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