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02-04-2011, 08:17 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Michigan
Posts: 15,821
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Animate: For most women, it is about the thought. The first Valentine's Day after my ex-husband and I got married, our daughter was 1 month old. It was a very cold and snowy winter so I had barely been able to leave the house while he was working 6 days/12 hours a day. I was totally exhausted/sleep deprived and going nuts with a colicky baby who screamed for 12 hours a day. I managed to make him a heart shaped brownie for Valentine's Day and had his favorite meal ready when he got home from work. This took a LOT of effort under the circumstances. He got home from work at 8 pm and didn't even have a card. He said "I tried to find a florist that was still open but couldn't". I was so incredibly hurt that I had found a way to make an effort in spite of my limited ability to get anything done and he hadn't found a way to even buy OR make a card.
He also didn't recognize my first Mother's Day as a Mom that year. Our first year of marriage and two major strikes. Not good.
In neither case did he need to spend a lot of money or make herculean efforts to recognize the special days. There aren't that many special days. It takes 10 minutes to do something nice. There's no excuse not to.
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02-04-2011, 08:39 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Dec 2002
Location: The Ozdust Ballroom
Posts: 14,819
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AGDee
Animate: For most women, it is about the thought. The first Valentine's Day after my ex-husband and I got married, our daughter was 1 month old. It was a very cold and snowy winter so I had barely been able to leave the house while he was working 6 days/12 hours a day. I was totally exhausted/sleep deprived and going nuts with a colicky baby who screamed for 12 hours a day. I managed to make him a heart shaped brownie for Valentine's Day and had his favorite meal ready when he got home from work. This took a LOT of effort under the circumstances. He got home from work at 8 pm and didn't even have a card. He said "I tried to find a florist that was still open but couldn't". I was so incredibly hurt that I had found a way to make an effort in spite of my limited ability to get anything done and he hadn't found a way to even buy OR make a card.
He also didn't recognize my first Mother's Day as a Mom that year. Our first year of marriage and two major strikes. Not good.
In neither case did he need to spend a lot of money or make herculean efforts to recognize the special days. There aren't that many special days. It takes 10 minutes to do something nice. There's no excuse not to.
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I'm thinking a "I didn't have time to get a card/flowers, but let me take the baby for the night and you get a full night's sleep." would have gone a long way in this case. Besides, there are NO florists open at 8pm on V-day? Lame....and besides, 99% of grocery stores sell flowers.
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02-04-2011, 09:57 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: but I am le tired...
Posts: 7,277
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We're going to the casino again. It's become a fun Valentine's Day tradition for us, which I love.
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02-04-2011, 10:48 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Sep 2004
Location: Smiths Station, AL
Posts: 1,753
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Hubby is taking me to Smokey Bones for dinner. He asked where I wanted to go, and that was my response. I have learned that the fancy schmancy places just arent my thing. Give me some BBQ and a movie, and I'm happy.
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AΞΔ - Courage, Graciousness, & Peace
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02-04-2011, 11:09 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: In a house.
Posts: 9,564
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Well unfortunately, I have to work on my day (payback for me having a week off due to storms last year around this time) but the wife and I found a nice little restaurant in downtown DC a few months ago, so I will take her there on Sunday.
But NOTHING can top the surprise party my fams had for me last year despite the blizzard!
....I gotta get back into the habit of taking my day off!
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Law and Order: Gotham - “In the Criminal Justice System of Gotham City the people are represented by three separate, yet equally important groups. The police who investigate crime, the District Attorneys who prosecute the offenders, and the Batman. These are their stories.”
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02-04-2011, 11:20 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Feb 2001
Location: here and there
Posts: 2,647
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amanda6035
Hubby is taking me to Smokey Bones for dinner. He asked where I wanted to go, and that was my response. I have learned that the fancy schmancy places just arent my thing. Give me some BBQ and a movie, and I'm happy.
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ohhh Yum ..I'm jealous .. for some reason Tucson doesn't has any good BBQ :-( at least not that I've been able to find.
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AXD helping women realize their potential since 1893
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02-04-2011, 12:45 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: May 2007
Location: 2 blocks from the end of the internet.
Posts: 736
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PrettyBoy
I agree. Continuing to "date" each other throughout the year is important, because it keeps the relationship fresh and new, but you don't have to do anything fancy for V-Day, man. Just make it a special day for her, to show her how much you love and appreciate her.
This year is a new year. You should try to keep the past out of the present and the future, because you can't have a better year holding onto something negative that happened in the past.
Don't be concerned about what other women think, focus on what your woman thinks. In healthy relationships, it's no longer about you, it's about the other person. It's about serving the other person. I try to go all out on V-Day every year for my lady friend  but that's not what it's all about, it's about spending uninterrupted quality time together, it doesn't matter how you're spending it.
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Yeah...I sound like the bitter old man lol.
I'm really not trying to hold last year against her it just makes things more interesting this year.
I'm not overly concerned with other women. I just find it a rarity to hear women talking about what they are going to do for their guy on the day. The women that do get major kudos from me. I'm not even big on gift giving occasions because i feel like I don't deserve any of it so to get anything is a blessing to me. I did just get an idea on something to do part of that day so I guess plans are in motion.
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Sometimes you want to go where everybody knows your name...I don't. That place is usually called work.
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02-04-2011, 02:33 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: Michigan
Posts: 15,821
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AlphaFrog
I'm thinking a "I didn't have time to get a card/flowers, but let me take the baby for the night and you get a full night's sleep." would have gone a long way in this case. Besides, there are NO florists open at 8pm on V-day? Lame....and besides, 99% of grocery stores sell flowers.
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They sell V-day cards for a month in advance... not being able to come up with something was totally lame. Truth be told, he didn't think about it until he walked in the door and I had his favorite dinner and a heart shaped brownie for him.
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02-04-2011, 05:11 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Mar 2000
Location: In My Skin
Posts: 635
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PrettyBoy
Don't be concerned about what other women think, focus on what your woman thinks. In healthy relationships, it's no longer about you, it's about the other person. It's about serving the other person. I try to go all out on V-Day every year for my lady friend but that's not what it's all about, it's about spending uninterrupted quality time together, it doesn't matter how you're spending it.
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Uh, ... PrettyBoy, ... may I snip a piece of your hair, so that I may clone you?
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Alpha Kappa Alpha
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#1 - Spring 2000
"If you judge people, you have no time to love them." - Mother Teresa
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02-04-2011, 06:19 PM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: CA
Posts: 1,116
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Quote:
Originally Posted by agzg
We're going to the casino again. It's become a fun Valentine's Day tradition for us, which I love.
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That's my kind of Valentines!
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02-05-2011, 12:39 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 63
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Quote:
Originally Posted by amanda6035
Hubby is taking me to Smokey Bones for dinner. He asked where I wanted to go, and that was my response. I have learned that the fancy schmancy places just arent my thing. Give me some BBQ and a movie, and I'm happy.
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Is Smokey Bones like a Famous Dave's?
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02-05-2011, 12:41 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 63
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Quote:
Originally Posted by christiangirl
Get something for B's mom and say it's "from him." At least a card, dude.
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She and I were supposed to do something together with Brandon, but she's now being a bitch about it.
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02-05-2011, 12:43 AM
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GreekChat Member
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Join Date: Sep 2007
Posts: 2,219
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sisco Kid
Is Smokey Bones like a Famous Dave's?
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Sort of, except Famous Dave's>>Smokey Bones.
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02-05-2011, 12:51 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jan 2011
Posts: 63
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Kappamd
Sort of, except Famous Dave's>>Smokey Bones.
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So I take it that Smokey Bones was first? I've never heard of them. Sounds like a good place to eat.
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02-05-2011, 02:32 AM
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Banned
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Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: In my house
Posts: 160
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I don't have any plans, just hanging out with friends that weekend. No man in the forecast, as usual.
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