costs of sororities at university of alabama

[33girl]

Originally Posted by MysticCat

Margretlee, I understand what you've said, although it took me a while to get there. But when I read things like "we'd like to stay in a certain range" and requests for rankings of sororities by cost, along with:

Originally Posted by margretlee
What if she likes one of the highest priced ones. We could come up with it, but do we want to do that with little sisters coming up??

I don't think it is unreasonable for someone to infer that your top concern is the cost, not where she feels most like she belongs. That may not be an accurate inference, but I don't think it is an unreasonable inference. It was how I read your posts at first, anyway,

That's exactly how I read her posts, and am still reading them. I mean, she made a big deal out of how they COULD afford it, so what exactly was the point of this thread?

To bitch about old row sororities not disclosing costs, methinks, and bash old row in general.

[margretlee]

Thank you, Bear, for your insights! That is the kind of info I was interested in.

Munchkin03, I never said anything about ANYBODY being shunted aside at all. I did not realize that this was a place for critiquing other people's grammar. You have just reminded me why I seldom ever participate in forums of this nature - why must people insist on trying to stir things up by misreading and misinterpreting things??? I try to give everyone the same respect. It is unfortunate that you would purposely misdirect my point in this manner. If it is in the slightest bit offensive to anyone, then I apologize, as that wa not my intent. But I cannot but wonder how many people would have actually taken it that way without your inflammatory suggestion.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by margretlee

Thank you, Bear, for your insights! That is the kind of info I was interested in.

Munchkin03, I never said anything about ANYBODY being shunted aside at all. I did not realize that this was a place for critiquing other people's grammar. You have just reminded me why I seldom ever participate in forums of this nature - why must people insist on trying to stir things up by misreading and misinterpreting things??? I try to give everyone the same respect. It is unfortunate that you would purposely misdirect my point in this manner. If it is in the slightest bit offensive to anyone, then I apologize, as that wa not my intent. But I cannot but wonder how many people would have actually taken it that way without your inflammatory suggestion.

Stand down!

I wasn't offended, since I can't be bothered to be offended by something a nameless, faceless person has to say, but you have to be aware that Greek Life is socioeconomically diverse. People, regardless of their backgrounds, make a way to pay for what they really want to do. For some young women, it was getting a job, or forgoing a ski holiday, if they wanted to be in a sorority.

The fact that you are, or perceive yourself to be, upper-middle class, has absolutely nothing to do with the point at hand. Right now, a lot of families thought they'd be able to take care of dues--but scholarships and loans are much harder to come by, so family budgets and college funds are stretched to the limit. Even families of modest means, who expected to be able to take care of something like Greek Life because their kids got Bright Futures or HOPE scholarships, can't do it for myriad reasons.

Each year, I write recs for girls from my hometown--some of whom are rushing right now with your daughter at Bama. Since I don't live near my hometown anymore, I talk to them on the phone. Several of them noted the exact same thing I said above--even though their families might not be "upper middle class," their parents wanted their daughters to take full advantage of what college had to offer. But, as you know, home values plummeted, college funds tanked, and credit lines were slashed (not that I'm condoning using credit cards to pay sorority dues, but you get my point). Suddenly, that money that a family was thinking could pay for sorority dues ends up having to pay for insurance. So, yeah--it's not just the "upper middle class" that's feeling the pinch of this here Great Recession!

[littleowl33]

Originally Posted by Munchkin03

Right now, a lot of families thought they'd be able to take care of dues--but scholarships and loans are much harder to come by, so family budgets and college funds are stretched to the limit. Even families of modest means, who expected to be able to take care of something like Greek Life because their kids got Bright Futures or HOPE scholarships, can't do it for myriad reasons.

OP, I definitely understand where you're coming from, and I think it's great how supportive you are of your daughter going greek despite the cost. When I entered college in 2006, my parents had enough money in stocks to pay for 4 years of college and few years of grad school for both my sister and I. Even though I received some financial aid, Hopkins is a pretty pricey school. Today, their financial situation is at a point where they can only pay for less than one year of college tuition for one of us. We're taking out loans, getting a bit more financial aid and making it work, but it's not easy.

As for being Greek - they were never terribly supportive of my going greek. But while they were happy to help me out with dues for the first few semesters, dues are now entirely my responsibility because they have become a luxury. We have had a few girls leave the chapter or depledge because of financial issues, and it breaks my heart. But these are the times we live in - and our dues are FAR less than Alabama's. We don't have houses, and at their highest (as a new member) my dues were ~$550. So, I work 40 hours a week in the summer and 20 hours a week during the year to afford my dues and the optional extras like t-shirt orders, dresses for formals, gifts for Littles and Little-Littles, etc.

My point is, I don't think it's at all unreasonable to expect your daughter to work a part-time job to help cover her dues, especially if she ends up in one of the more expensive sororities. At least, I would expect her to cover extra sorority-related expenses. Obviously it's your family's decision, but if I were you I would tell her that you'll be happy to pay the average cost listed on the website (since that's what you budgeted for), and have her make up the difference if it's going to be more expensive. It probably would have been better to have this discussion earlier, but if you didn't have that information until now, that's not really your fault.

[UGAalum94]

I think that your comment just may have seemed to be a sweeping one, rather than one that referred to your own circumstances, which is what I think you intended.

Don't fret about it.

ETA: in a somewhat related note, I really do hope that girls and their families thing about what the financial obligations are before they get initiated. I've known a couple of girls who dropped out because they decided in the hierarchy of expenses, it wasn't "worth it." The chapter will budget based on the number of members, and when you drop from active status before you graduate in all but the most dire circumstances, you are hurting the chapter and bailing on what you should see as an obligation. Sorority membership isn't designed to be the equivalent of a gym membership or something.

[KSUViolet06]

Originally Posted by UGAalum94

Sorority membership isn't designed to be the equivalent of a gym membership or something.

Yes. It's a big financial commitment.

[KSUViolet06]

I don't think anyone is being mean here.

As far as cost info, if you have materials stating that costs average in the $6,000-$8,000 range, then that is what you should be prepared to spend.

If she gets a bid, there's no way for you to know if her sorority is going to be higher or lower than this approximate amount.

So I'd just assume and budget for her sorority to be at the higher end. If it's not, then you'll be pleasantly surprised.

If costs are an issue, consider her getting a part time job or something to pay dues. It's certainly not uncommon for people to do that.

There are many ways to make being Greek affordable, like cutting back on going out to eat, fewer shopping trips, etc.

[AuburnMom08]

Margretlee - as a mom I understand your questions and concerns, I don't think you are out of line in the least for having those questions and hoping someone here could help you. Good luck to your girl, please stay with us and let us know how it goes!

[margretlee]

How on earth a simple inquiry about potential prices turned into this is unfathomable to me. If I made comments about my personal situation, it was for clarification in response to someone else's comments. I said that we had set aside money because people suggested payment plans and such, not because I am a snob. I referred to the economic crisis because some thought we did not prepare or investigate in advance. Most of my remarks after my initial inquiry were in an effort to explain why I was asking about costs. I really was not seeking out opinions about whether or not my daughter should rush, what personal financial choices my family should make, etc., but thanks for the input. I really just wanted to know if anyone here knew about which ones fell into the upper range. I was also wondering if anyone knew why the discrepancies in the prices found online at Bama's websites. I think it's time for me to bow out of this converstaion before it gets out of hand. I mean, really, "I think most people are aware of the economic crisis you don't need to tell us about it."?That is so rude. Yes, most people are aware of the crisis, but no one here has any idea how it has affected me and my family without my informing them of it. Honestly, is all the negativity helping anything at all? Why not just say that you have no idea what the highest cost sororities at Bama are, or say nothing at all???

At least I do not have listed under my hobbies" Making fun of trashy, pretentious people", as Munchkin03 does. For heaven's sake. Yes I am "nameless and faceless" but so are you, Munchkin. I felt anonymnity was in order since it is the middle of the recruitment process, and it is obvious some people on here are involved in that process.

I hold no ill will, but respectfully ask that you please refrain from the rudeness. Isn't that one of the first rules in a sorority - to treat people with respect???

[KSUViolet06]

I fail to see where people are being rude.

I think what people are trying to say is that if you are hearing that costs are in the $6,000 range, then that is what you should plan on spending.

If your daughter gets a bid to a chapter with lower costs, then no big deal.

Just plan on spending in the higher range, since you can't predict which she'll get a bid from (or if she'll receive one).

You've actually gotten some pretty good advice.

[33girl]

I think the "upper middle class" thing is what stuck in people's craws. You didn't need to throw your status (or what you perceive to be your status) in there - it's tacky.

The fact of the matter is - your daughter is looking for a lifetime home, not a sweater. You can't comparison shop in a bloodless sort of fashion. If the highest figure you have seen anywhere is $6000+, I would go with that and if you can't afford it, your daughter either needs to get a job or drop out of rush.

If this is the first time pamphlets were passed out at Bama, I would wager some of the groups simply forgot them - it's easy to forget your head in rush craziness. To assume that it's a don't ask don't tell or that they don't want members who aren't rich is being just as rude to those groups as you are accusing people of being to you.

[Munchkin03]

Originally Posted by margretlee

At least I do not have listed under my hobbies" Making fun of trashy, pretentious people", as Munchkin03 does. For heaven's sake. Yes I am "nameless and faceless" but so are you, Munchkin. I felt anonymnity was in order since it is the middle of the recruitment process, and it is obvious some people on here are involved in that process.

I hold no ill will, but respectfully ask that you please refrain from the rudeness. Isn't that one of the first rules in a sorority - to treat people with respect???

Wow. I haven't updated my profile in about 5 years; even then, it was an inside joke between me and people who rarely post on GC anymore.

I'm not being rude at all--if you read my second post, you'll see where I explained that it's not just "upper middle class" people feeling the brunt of this recession and having to make a decision between paying sorority dues and paying for books.

In before the flounce and lock!

[CougarGrad]

Pardon me for jumping in, but I think the questions have been asked and answered.

*Edit* I can't type as fast as KSUViolet.

[LadyLonghorn]

Rude? You want rude? I'm taking bets on how long it will take for mom to come back to complain how those snobby high priced old row houses cut the salesman's daughter.

I think you received very good and polite answers to your questions that also took your daughter's happiness into consideration.

You know, I love being Greek but I would have not only survived but thrived without it. I can't believe how many people now think it's some sort of right to go Greek, no matter what their current circumstances.

[VandalSquirrel]

Originally Posted by LadyLonghorn

Rude? You want rude? I'm taking bets on how long it will take for mom to come back to complain how those snobby high priced old row houses cut the salesman's daughter.

I think you received very good and polite answers to your questions that also took your daughter's happiness into consideration.

You know, I love being Greek but I would have not only survived but thrived without it. I can't believe how many people now think it's some sort of right to go Greek, no matter what their current circumstances.

I felt the need to use this, again.