Lavalier?

[LucyKKG]

Soooo...guess what! He lavaliered me! He gave me the lavalier a few weeks ago, but I didn't write about it until now because we JUST had the candle pass ceremony. I seriously couldn't stop smiling when I saw the lav.

The ceremony was so nice and everyone "oohed" and "aahed" when our president explained what its purpose was. They oohed and aahed a lot more when I turned off the candle! :-)

[Zillini]

Congrats!

Lavaliering and pinning were two of my favorite traditions when I was in school. It was always exciting to walk into the house and see the candle sitting on the table, the announcement there was a candlepass that night. Everyone started speculating on who could it be? It was the talk of the house for the whole day. It can't be Jane, she's only been dating her guy a month. It can't be Susie. She's been dating her boyfriend forever and if he hasn't given her his pin by now, he never will.

Then after dinner everyone would gather around and the pass would start. I loved the song we sang. The candle slowly moved around the room. Everybody watched the girls we thought it might be but they passed the candle on to the next. Wow, not her or her! I thought for sure it was one of those. One of the top "contenders" made a move to blow it out. Psyche! Nope not her either. The candle continued around the circle.

One time around and everyone clapped and cheered. A pinning! Wait, could it even be an engagement? (A real rarity when I was in school.) The singing started up again and the anticipation was even stronger. The field of potential candidates had significantly narrowed. All eyes were now on the girls we knew were already lavaliered. (Every once in a blue moon we'd have a shocker with someone who's boyfriend skipped lavaliering and went straight to pinning.)

Finally the candle got blown out and the room erupted with clapping, cheering and hugs. Not long afterwards the sounds of male singing could be heard outside. All the sisters would file outside to be seranaded by the guy's fraternity. They would sing hello and we would sing/answer back. Then the young man in question would be drug out to the front of the pack to sing to his lady love. The girl would shyly be pushed forward as well and the singing continued.

The whole thing was sweet and it's a lovely memory. (Especially if you don't think about everyone heading to the nearest bar afterwards for an impromptu mixer. Though those were always fun too. )

[SWTXBelle]

Somehow "turning off the candle" just doesn't resonate like "blowing out the candle". Ah well . . .congratulations, LucyKKG!

[Smile_Awhile]

Originally Posted by Zillini

Congrats!

Lavaliering and pinning were two of my favorite traditions when I was in school. It was always exciting to walk into the house and see the candle sitting on the table, the announcement there was a candlepass that night. Everyone started speculating on who could it be? It was the talk of the house for the whole day. It can't be Jane, she's only been dating her guy a month. It can't be Susie. She's been dating her boyfriend forever and if he hasn't given her his pin by now, he never will.

Then after dinner everyone would gather around and the pass would start. I loved the song we sang. The candle slowly moved around the room. Everybody watched the girls we thought it might be but they passed the candle on to the next. Wow, not her or her! I thought for sure it was one of those. One of the top "contenders" made a move to blow it out. Psyche! Nope not her either. The candle continued around the circle.

One time around and everyone clapped and cheered. A pinning! Wait, could it even be an engagement? (A real rarity when I was in school.) The singing started up again and the anticipation was even stronger. The field of potential candidates had significantly narrowed. All eyes were now on the girls we knew were already lavaliered. (Every once in a blue moon we'd have a shocker with someone who's boyfriend skipped lavaliering and went straight to pinning.)

Finally the candle got blown out and the room erupted with clapping, cheering and hugs. Not long afterwards the sounds of male singing could be heard outside. All the sisters would file outside to be seranaded by the guy's fraternity. They would sing hello and we would sing/answer back. Then the young man in question would be drug out to the front of the pack to sing to his lady love. The girl would shyly be pushed forward as well and the singing continued.

The whole thing was sweet and it's a lovely memory. (Especially if you don't think about everyone heading to the nearest bar afterwards for an impromptu mixer. Though those were always fun too. )

This kind of thing makes me wish I was in a Greek system with this tradition. But we're too small (and sororities are unhoused) for it to ever work.

[canadianKKG]

Originally Posted by Smile_Awhile

This kind of thing makes me wish I was in a Greek system with this tradition. But we're too small (and sororities are unhoused) for it to ever work.

Sorry to post again, but up here at my university in Canada, we have one fraternity and three sororities, and have been here less than 20 years. You can always start a tradition

[honeychile]

Originally Posted by Zillini

Congrats!

Lavaliering and pinning were two of my favorite traditions when I was in school. It was always exciting to walk into the house and see the candle sitting on the table, the announcement there was a candlepass that night. Everyone started speculating on who could it be? It was the talk of the house for the whole day. It can't be Jane, she's only been dating her guy a month. It can't be Susie. She's been dating her boyfriend forever and if he hasn't given her his pin by now, he never will.

Then after dinner everyone would gather around and the pass would start. I loved the song we sang. The candle slowly moved around the room. Everybody watched the girls we thought it might be but they passed the candle on to the next. Wow, not her or her! I thought for sure it was one of those. One of the top "contenders" made a move to blow it out. Psyche! Nope not her either. The candle continued around the circle.

One time around and everyone clapped and cheered. A pinning! Wait, could it even be an engagement? (A real rarity when I was in school.) The singing started up again and the anticipation was even stronger. The field of potential candidates had significantly narrowed. All eyes were now on the girls we knew were already lavaliered. (Every once in a blue moon we'd have a shocker with someone who's boyfriend skipped lavaliering and went straight to pinning.)

Finally the candle got blown out and the room erupted with clapping, cheering and hugs. Not long afterwards the sounds of male singing could be heard outside. All the sisters would file outside to be seranaded by the guy's fraternity. They would sing hello and we would sing/answer back. Then the young man in question would be drug out to the front of the pack to sing to his lady love. The girl would shyly be pushed forward as well and the singing continued.

The whole thing was sweet and it's a lovely memory. (Especially if you don't think about everyone heading to the nearest bar afterwards for an impromptu mixer. Though those were always fun too. )

That's pretty much how I remember it, too - except the outside seranading. It's pretty hard to seranade someone on the tenth floor! The only other difference is that very few sisters got lavaliered, but pinning and engagements were rampant!

One way we could narrow down a pinning was if someone who rarely wore the shirt & pullover combination suddenly showed up at meeting in one. After she blew out the candle, there would be the stripping of the sweater!

I suppose that turning off the candle doesn't have the cachet of blowing it out, but when you did blow it out, sisters would hug you, and someone almost always got burned by the just-blown-out candle - but it was worth it!

[PhiLove83]

Congrats on your lavaliering Lucy!!! The other girl who was on here talking about it AEPhiLC also got lavaliered over break!

[Beach Peach]

Im having a similar issue... also i just subscribed today... can anyone tell me how to post a new thread?

[owlkeyalumna]

I would hint at it. But be wary of the "curse of the lavaliere". Seriously, it seems like every couple that has been "lavaliered", they haven't lasted. But that's just me. It depends on how you are viewing the lavaliere. It can be seen as a sign of his devotion to you to go steady, or as a pre-engagement. Plus, he would have to look into Theta Chi to see how they handle this.

Good luck!

[texas*princess]

Originally Posted by LucyKKG

However, I know that's nothing he would think to do, because it just isn't done out here in hippy-ville.

Thoughts? Suggestions?

If you don't think he'd want to do it, then my thought & suggestion for you would be to let it go.

Laveliering is a huge deal - supposedly the step right before engagement.

You wouldn't badger a guy to get engaged to you.. would you badger a guy to lavelier you?

[LucyKKG]

Originally Posted by texas*princess

If you don't think he'd want to do it, then my thought & suggestion for you would be to let it go.

Laveliering is a huge deal - supposedly the step right before engagement.

You wouldn't badger a guy to get engaged to you.. would you badger a guy to lavelier you?

Umm this was quite a while ago, but yeah...I was asking about it because lavaliering wasn't something people at my school had even heard of.

And I know I've mentioned it elsewhere, but I broke up with this guy over a year ago.

[lovespink88]

Sigh...I wish my school did these cute traditions. AFAIK, lavaliering is not done here any longer. Nor is pinning or anything like that. Heck, I haven't even heard of any chapter doing a candle pass!

I once asked my bf if he knew what it was. He didn't know so I explained it to him. When I was done, he pointed at the necklace he gave me and said "There's you're lavalier" in a "I could care less about this Greek tradition" kind of voice, lol

And I know for sure I would never get pinned, because the day after he was initiated he told me that they were told they could not pin a girl with their badge...too many instances of girls breaking up with the guy, and then the guy never getting his badge back, lol. But he doesn't even have a badge...and that's another story...

I believe his fraternity does have a "Sweetheart" pin for those purposes though. But, again, he's not into that kind of thing, and it's not done around here anyways. Oh well!

[Psi U MC Vito]

Originally Posted by lovespink88

Sigh...I wish my school did these cute traditions. AFAIK, lavaliering is not done here any longer. Nor is pinning or anything like that. Heck, I haven't even heard of any chapter doing a candle pass!

I once asked my bf if he knew what it was. He didn't know so I explained it to him. When I was done, he pointed at the necklace he gave me and said "There's you're lavalier" in a "I could care less about this Greek tradition" kind of voice, lol

And I know for sure I would never get pinned, because the day after he was initiated he told me that they were told they could not pin a girl with their badge...too many instances of girls breaking up with the guy, and then the guy never getting his badge back, lol. But he doesn't even have a badge...and that's another story...

I believe his fraternity does have a "Sweetheart" pin for those purposes though. But, again, he's not into that kind of thing, and it's not done around here anyways. Oh well!

I'm glad that I'm not the only person who never heard of this tradition, at lest before GC. Though my fraternity does have a sweetheart pin, I'm not sure how commonly it is used. Lovespink can you PM me if it turns out your BF is a Psi U, because I know we have a couple of chapters in Illinois.

[KSUViolet06]

Lavaliering was more common. I participated in many a candle pass as an undergrad (sometimes 2 in one week). It was always a fraternity member giving his fraternity letters. I don't recall anyone being lavaliered with their own letters.

At my alma mater, there wasn't alot of pinning going on. I only knew one person who was pinned while I was in school.

Most people skipped from lavaliering to engagement.

I know at my boyfriend's chapter of Sigma Chi, Lavaliering a girl was a chapter decision. The brother may bring up the idea at chapter meeting, but it was a vote amongst the brotherhood whether or not they believed the girl was worthy of wearing their letters. Being allowed to wear the necklace and lettered shirts meant you were important to the brothers and they felt you represented the principles of the fraternity.
His chapter tradition usually included dinner with the brother and girlfriend, then going back to the chapter house and having the brothers circle around the couple and sing the Sweetheart of Sigma Chi song.

In contrast, from what I know, Pinning is something that is personal between a brother and his girlfriend only. A pre-cursor to engagement and whatnot. I was lavaliered at his chapter house, then became the chapter sweetheart a year later, and when I finally moved in with him after college he gave me his badge. I wear it with pride, not only knowing I am loved very much by a Sigma Chi, but also as a Sweeheart, by the whole fraternity.

I was never in a Sorority so I never participated in a candle pass but it sounds wonderful! <3